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Your child's partner's parents.

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by GGardner, Nov 27, 2020.

  1. GGardner

    GGardner Friend of Leo's

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    Recently, my wife and I were invited to a (socially distanced) event with the parents of my daughter's boyfriend (in their McMansion). It was pleasant enough but it occurred to me as i was sitting there making vapid small talk that this couple might be in our lives for the next 30 years. We are worlds apart. I'm interested in hearing other people's experiences because this is a whole new world for me.
     
    Last edited: Nov 27, 2020
  2. WingedWords

    WingedWords Tele-Afflicted

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    Never met 'em.
     
  3. Gardo

    Gardo Tele-Afflicted Silver Supporter

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    I generally try to distance myself from them. Life seems easier that way. I’m polite and make small talk but that’s the limit. I especially avoid conversations about the future
     
  4. Larry F

    Larry F Doctor of Teleocity Vendor Member

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    Whenever I run into someone who is on a different planet, I have to remember that they might say the same about me.
     
  5. P-Nutz

    P-Nutz Tele-Afflicted Silver Supporter

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    Yes.
     
  6. brookdalebill

    brookdalebill Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

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    I charm everyone I meet!
    Doesn’t everyone?
    ;):twisted::lol:
     
  7. Manual Slim

    Manual Slim Friend of Leo's

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    I can charm people, but do I have to like them?
     
  8. Harry Styron

    Harry Styron Friend of Leo's Gold Supporter

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    I have three married sons. I’ve lived my life in northeast Oklahoma and southwest Missouri. My wife is from southeast Missouri. We are small-town people who went to the state university and returned to small-town life.

    Our eldest son went to a selective liberal arts college on a scholarship. After college he went to Japan and taught English in an elementary school on the tiny island of Ikina. In Japan he met a girl from Burstwick, a village in Yorkshire east of Hull and they eventually married, lived in London from several years and now live in Anchorage. Her father is now retired from a career working in a foundry and a refinery.

    Her mother worked in a clerical position. Having only met her parents briefly at a pub in York, they came to visit several years ago at Christmas and stayed in our modest home for 20 days. We had a wonderful time with them. They took walks, cooked and helped with household chores. They were intelligent, well-informed and could not have been more compatible.

    Our middle son is a PhD geologist, as is his brilliant wife, who was raised in the US by a physician who emigrated from Germany and a nurse who immigrated from Cuba. The physician died shortly before we met this family. My daughter-in-law’s mother is a delight. She lives in St Louis, and we’ve spent quite a bit of time with her. She speaks good English and several other European languages. I told her that English does not have a term for referring to my son’s in-laws. She said the Spanish word is “conseugros.”

    My youngest son married a nice woman from West Texas. While their relationship has been troubled, my wife and I enjoyed a good relationship with her parents, who own a business in Terlingua and have been hospitable to us. Their political views and ours don’t match, but none of us rant, and we have similar evaluations of one another’s children.
     
    Last edited: Nov 27, 2020
    Fretting out, JL_LI, Taurus and 11 others like this.
  9. Cheap Trills

    Cheap Trills Tele-Holic Silver Supporter

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    you're very lucky
     
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  10. tah1962

    tah1962 Friend of Leo's

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    +1
     
  11. mkdaws32

    mkdaws32 Tele-Afflicted Gold Supporter

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    Get along with them very very well actually. But one of my son’s past girlfriend’s parents were high upper class. Big homes in multiple countries, fly on a whim to go to dinner in New York, etc. Totally different world. They were extremely gracious and generous people, but I had a hard time being comfortable around them - likely entirely my issue and not theirs.
     
  12. Bryan A

    Bryan A Tele-Meister

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    What’s a McMansion. I know WHAT one is, just wondering what is the heated square footage of one, in your opinion? Just wondering if I live in a McMansion or not.
     
  13. WalthamMoosical

    WalthamMoosical Tele-Holic Ad Free Member

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    Heated square footage, or heatable square footage? I can't afford to heat some of what I have.
     
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  14. thesamhill

    thesamhill Tele-Holic Silver Supporter

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    I was worried about my parents and my in-laws, but it turned out not to be a problem. It has been easy enough to figure out ways to make the logistics not quite work out. They rarely see each other, and NEVER in each other's homes. It's always in our house, or in auditoriums where neither is really "at home." Keeps everyone civil.
     
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  15. Bryan A

    Bryan A Tele-Meister

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    my house is 3000 heated with a 600 ft unheated garage on 1 acre, surrounded by another 15 cleared acres of family farm land. Is this Mcmansion territory, or am I just an uppity redneck, which is what I’ve always assumed that I am?
     
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  16. nojazzhere

    nojazzhere Doctor of Teleocity

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    IMHO, if you have to ask, you DO live in one.
    Those of us who don't live in a McMansion definitely KNOW we don't. ;)
    (you're just seeking deniability, aren't you?)
     
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  17. Bryan A

    Bryan A Tele-Meister

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    the thing is, I live on private land surrounded by family land. I never have, and never would dream of, lived in a subdivision with an hoa telling me how to live. Are McMansions limited to subdivisions?
     
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  18. telleutelleme

    telleutelleme Telefied Silver Supporter

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    Next time bring a keg, Telecaster and amp. Might as well establish any necessary boundaries early on.
     
  19. GGardner

    GGardner Friend of Leo's

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    I didn't mean to use the term, "McMansion," pejoratively. It was my lazy way of describing a beautiful house in a beautiful neighborhood built by the same builder (so they share similar DNA such as vaulted ceilings, an over abundance of bathrooms, huge kitchens, etc.) In my town, the average home is probably $500K. This house was in a neighborhood where all the homes cost seven figures.

    My original point was only that when I got married, I suddenly inherited a whole new family and all new universe of responsibilities, squabbles, dramas, time-sucks, etc. But I factored that into my calculations -- "Is marrying this woman worth being a part of this family forever?" I decided, "sure," and proposed.

    But I'll also be forever attached to the parents of whomever my kids chose. It's not necessarily a bad thing, just a a thing that never occurred to me before. I'm shallow that way.
     
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  20. Engine Swap

    Engine Swap Tele-Afflicted

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    Give it time and you'll find some common ground.
     
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