Worst Lyrics

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by TeleToTheRain, Jan 16, 2014.

  1. AlpineHillbilly

    AlpineHillbilly TDPRI Member

    Posts:
    87
    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2012
    Location:
    Boston
    "Is there gas in the car? Yes there's gas in the car." Steely Dan, Kid Charlamagne.
     
  2. Gautfrid

    Gautfrid Banned

    Posts:
    2,747
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2013
    Location:
    England

    What's the matter with that? It's a question and an answer.

    It's probably the least 'worst' lyric in a song that contains 'Just by chance you crossed the diamond with the pearl/You turned it on the world, that's when you turned the world around'

    Not that I think Kid Charlemagne has any 'bad' lyrics. It's another one of the Dan's clever and sly gems.
     
  3. Ted M

    Ted M Tele-Afflicted

    Posts:
    1,309
    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2003
    It's not in the words that you told me
    It's not in the way you say you're mine ooh ooh ooh
    It's not in the way that you came back to me
    It's not in the way that your love set me free
    It's not in the way you look or the things that you say that you do

    This makes no sense at all, and sounds like a work-in-progress lyric they were using until the lyrics actually got written.

    Many will disagree, but I also think the entire lyric to Hotel California is hilariously bad. Lyin' Eyes is even worse.
     
  4. Gautfrid

    Gautfrid Banned

    Posts:
    2,747
    Joined:
    Aug 25, 2013
    Location:
    England

    As a 'wife gone bad' song Lyin' Eyes is light years ahead of Ruby, Don't Take Your Love to Town
     
  5. Skully

    Skully Doctor of Teleocity

    Posts:
    12,412
    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2003
    Location:
    Glamorous NoHo
    I disagree strongly. I think it's a great lyric -- a well-told gothic horror tale with some very good subtext.

    Eh. I'm not going to defend "Lyin' Eyes."
     
  6. MilwMark

    MilwMark Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    10,538
    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2013
    Location:
    near Arnold's
    Almost 150 posts in, and nobody's Hungry Like the Wolf?

    "I smell like I sound".

    Really, Simon?

    Great guitar hook though.
     
  7. Skully

    Skully Doctor of Teleocity

    Posts:
    12,412
    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2003
    Location:
    Glamorous NoHo
    I always thought it was "smell like a sound." Either way, a good line.
     
  8. tonytrout

    tonytrout Friend of Leo's

    Age:
    43
    Posts:
    2,807
    Joined:
    Mar 19, 2003
    Location:
    Brasstown/Murphy, NC

    Watch the documentary about the Eagles and Don H. explains the song meaning. FWIW, I love, "Lyin' Eyes"....I think it's one of their best songs.
     
  9. gwjensen

    gwjensen Friend of Leo's Platinum Supporter

    Posts:
    3,083
    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2011
    Location:
    District of Chicanery
    I love that line! The whole song is about Stanley Owsley, who made the best acid in San Francisco in the sixties, so the song begins with the diamond/pearl reference to the strength/purity of his LSD and concludes with his get a way (is there gas in the car...). In fact, I also like the gas line as it underscores the desperate escape from the law. You can just picture them running around going through this frantic to-do checklist.

    Steeley Dan wrote NO bad lyrics.
     
  10. BigDaddyLH

    BigDaddyLH Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    51,386
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2009
    Location:
    Kelowna, BC, Canuckistan
    Any Bro' Country make the list? I like the repeated use of "party" in "Parking Lot Party":

    Cause there ain't no party like the pre-party
    And after the party the after-party
    At the parking lot party


    Dang, that's a mess of partyin'
     
  11. Skully

    Skully Doctor of Teleocity

    Posts:
    12,412
    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2003
    Location:
    Glamorous NoHo
    I actually like the words to Tyler Farr's "Redneck Crazy," and I'm no redneck. I was know to play and sing it for my own amusement last year.

    The narrator is the kind of schmuck who would listen to bro' country, but that doesn't mean it's not a good song. It's similar to one of those books that puts you in the mind of a killer, you know?

     
  12. jmiles

    jmiles Friend of Leo's

    Posts:
    3,632
    Joined:
    Nov 29, 2003
    Location:
    ohio
    Parking Lot Party is horrible, but Watermelon Crawl got me to turn off Country Radio!
     
  13. gentlyweeping

    gentlyweeping Tele-Meister

    Posts:
    124
    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2013
    Location:
    Mpls/St. Paul, MN
    Turn The Page.
    Stop whining and grow up. Try another career path if you're so miserable.
     
  14. Blazer

    Blazer Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Age:
    43
    Posts:
    15,505
    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2003
    Location:
    The Netherlands
    Nirvana's "On a plain", the song had been recorded and needed lyrics and so Kurt Cobain just jotted down anything that came to mind.

    I'll start this off without any words
    I got so high that I scratched 'till I bled

    I love myself better than you
    I know it's wrong so what should I do?

    The finest day that I ever had
    Was when I learned to cry on command

    I love myself better than you
    I know it's wrong so what should I do?
    I'm on a plain
    I can't complain
    I'm on a plain

    My brother died every night
    It's safe to say, don't quote me on that

    I love myself better than you
    I know it's wrong so what should I do?

    The black sheep got blackmailed again
    Forgot to put on the zip code

    I love myself better than you
    I know it's wrong so what should I do?

    I'm on a plain
    I can't complain
    I'm on a plain

    Somewhere I have heard this before
    In a dream my memory has stored
    As a defense I'm neutered and spayed
    What the hell am I trying to say?

    It is now time to make it unclear
    To write off lines that don't make sense

    I love myself better than you
    I know it's wrong so what should I do?

    And one more special message to go
    And then I'm done, then I can go home

    I love myself better than you
    I know it's wrong so what should I do?



    On "I am the Walrus" on the Beatles anthology John Lennon said that he heard about literature students trying to decipher his lyrics and he basically went "Decipher THIS!" But Paul also wrote some real stinkers.

    Such as

    Now somewhere in the black mountain hills of Dakota
    There lived a young boy named Rocky Raccoon
    And one day his woman ran off with another guy
    Hit young Rocky in the eye Rocky didn't like that
    He said I'm gonna get that boy
    So one day he walked into town
    Booked himself a room in the local saloon

    Rocky Raccoon checked into his room
    Only to find Gideon's bible
    Rocky had come equipped with a gun
    To shoot off the legs of his rival
    His rival it seems had broken his dreams
    By stealing the girl of his fancy
    Her name was Magil and she called herself Lil
    But everyone knew her as Nancy
    Now she and her man who called himself Dan
    Were in the next room at the hoe down
    Rocky burst in and grinning a grin
    He said Danny boy this is a showdown
    But Daniel was hot, he drew first and shot
    And Rocky collapsed in the corner, ah

    D'da d'da d'da da da da
    D'da d'da d'da da da da
    D'da d'da d'da da d'da d'da d'da d'da
    Do do do do do do

    D'do d'do d'do do do do
    D'do d'do d'do do do do
    D'do d'do d'do do do d'do d'do d'do d'do
    Do do do do do do

    Now the doctor came in stinking of gin
    And proceeded to lie on the table
    He said Rocky you met your match
    And Rocky said, doc it's only a scratch
    And I'll be better I'll be better doc as soon as I am able

    And now Rocky Raccoon he fell back in his room
    Only to find Gideon's bible
    Gideon checked out and he left it no doubt
    To help with good Rocky's revival, ah
    Oh yeah, yeah

    D'do d'do d'do do do do
    D'do d'do d'do do do do
    D'do d'do d'do do do d'do d'do d'do d'do
    Do do do do do do

    D'do d'do d'do do do do, come on, Rocky boy
    D'do d'do d'do do do do, come on, Rocky boy
    D'do d'do d'do do do d'do d'do d'do d'do
    The story of Rocky there


    But by far the biggest stinker of all lyric-wise (because the song is still good)

    You say "Yes", I say "No".
    You say "Stop" and I say "Go, go, go".
    Oh no.
    You say "Goodbye" and I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello.

    I say "High", you say "Low".
    You say "Why?" And I say "I don't know".
    Oh no.
    You say "Goodbye" and I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    (Hello, goodbye, hello, goodbye. Hello, goodbye.)
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello".

    (Hello, goodbye, hello, goodbye. Hello, goodbye. Hello, goodbye.)
    Why, why, why, why, why, why, do you
    Say "Goodbye, goodbye, bye, bye".
    Oh no.
    You say "Goodbye" and I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello".

    You say "Yes", I say "No".
    (I say "Yes", but I may mean "No").
    You say "Stop", I say "Go, go, go".
    (I can stay still it's time to go).
    Oh, oh no.

    You say "Goodbye" and I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello, hello, hello".
    I don't know why you say "Goodbye", I say "Hello-wow, oh. Hello".
    Hela, heba, helloa. Hela, heba, helloa. Hela, heba, helloa.
    Hela, heba, helloa. (Hela.) Hela, heba, helloa. Hela, heba, helloa.
    Hela, heba, helloa. Hela, heba, helloa. Hela, heba, helloa.



    The funny thing was that when Paul was writing "Hey Jude" he actually didn't want to include the lyric "The movement you need is on your shoulder" because of it making no sense but when he told John that that line would not be in the song John went "Are you mad? It's the best line of the song!"
     
  15. joelster

    joelster TDPRI Member

    Posts:
    74
    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2010
    Location:
    Portland, OR
    In the darkest depths of Mordor
    I met a girl so fair
    But Gollum and The Evil One
    Crept up and slipped away with her

    (I always post this one when I see these bad lyric threads...)
     
  16. TwangyWhammy

    TwangyWhammy Friend of Leo's

    Posts:
    2,354
    Joined:
    Jan 10, 2014
    Location:
    South Hemi GMT+12
    Yay… I won!

    Get the prize
    Prize the get
    Prize, prize, prize get
    Get, get, get prize!

    Whoohoo!! :D
     
  17. omahaaudio

    omahaaudio Friend of Leo's

    Age:
    64
    Posts:
    2,459
    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2015
    Location:
    Omaha
    That's a GREAT line and, probably, the only time that the word "moot" has been used correctly in a song!

    For bad lyrics, pick a Grateful Dead song...

    "Through the transitive nightfall of diamonds?
    Mirror shatters in formless reflections of matter.
    Glass hand dissolving to ice petal flowers revolving.
    Lady in velvet recedes in the nights of goodbye."
     
  18. Colo Springs E

    Colo Springs E Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    15,069
    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2003
    Location:
    Colorado Springs
    Skulls, I've always had such respect for you! :lol: Just funnin' we all have our guilty pleasures.

    One thing I will say, the way lyrics flow in a song matters. So when laid out in writing, may not be that impressive (or maybe even suck), but in the context of the arrangement... sometimes it all comes together and works.
     
  19. Blazer

    Blazer Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Age:
    43
    Posts:
    15,505
    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2003
    Location:
    The Netherlands
    So who dunnit?



    Was it you or was it me?
    Was it he or she?
    Was it A or was it B?
    Or was it X to Z?

    Who dunnit?
     
  20. Colo Springs E

    Colo Springs E Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    15,069
    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2003
    Location:
    Colorado Springs
    I don't consider that solo sloppy... I would call it unorthodox, and I actually kind of like it.

    Foreigner lyrics? Yeah, I'm with ya.
     
IMPORTANT: Treat everyone here with respect, no matter how difficult!
No sex, drug, political, religion or hate discussion permitted here.


  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.