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Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by chiefline, Feb 18, 2017.
Order two ..pass one around and hoard the other, and don't bother with those others passed to you.
Going out to dinner with friends does nor imply/require sharing your plate unless, perhaps, you are out for Chinese which is typically eaten "family style". If I go out with friends, and get a prime rib, I'm not going to cut my prime rib up in little squares and pass it around. If I get a half rack of ribs (6), they are MY ribs. I'm not trading half my Chicken Cacciatori for a portion of someones Spagetti Alfredo. To each his own...literally.
Do you like pie?
Your guests feel special.
Your server feels special.
You get the pleasure of being a thoughtful, generous host.
Yeah, covered by "cuisine appropriate...". Unless you're doing tapas or other shared plates, no one is expecting to share mains. Appetisers get shared between couples pretty often though, no matter where you're eating.
Nope, I'm with you 100%. The only person I'll share with is my wife, and that took a while.
Bring the squid. In its original form.
Restaurants provide you with two forks for a reason: One's for eating, one's for stabbing the hands that reach for your food.
Let me guess, you're not a swinger.
Maybe you mean, gastronomical?
Thanksgiving at your house must be a real hoot...
Yes, you're kinda wrong...kinda. An appetizer isn't supposed to be the meal. And manners - at least the manners I remember - means that at a table things like appetizers are shared. It's kind of a social norm thing. The entree, unless things are being served family style, is individual. And if you don't like the other appetizers, you don't need to eat them. Just politely say no. I do.
But if it bugs you so much, order the appetizer you like as your entree. Problem solved.
Or. order extra calamari so that you have extra to consume.
Sounds like sharing appetizers is the rule rather than the exception in North America. Here in Europe, I'd say it is the other way round. Most places I go to you choose an individual starter for yourself, although they often do sharing platters for everyone to dig into.
So for me the rule is if it comes on a small plate and served to me personally, I'm not sharing it with anyone, but if there's a big platter in the middle of the table, get stuck in everyone.
Order two of the same appetizer.
One for you, one to pass around.
If they ask any questions, cover your plate and growl a lot.
Kind of, at traditional Chinese restaurants, they put the plates/trays in the middle and the different guests take from them.
But I would say in most cultures people do something like this when served at home with guests. There may be individual items some guests "order", but also items for everyone to take from plates in the middle.
I guess the difference is when you go to a restaurant and pay for your own food.
It's an easily solved problem, as a few others have already mentioned. Just be vocal about it, my wife does that all the time when we eat with a big group. She'll say something like, "my husband and I are going to share the <whatever> appetizer, do we want to get some appetizers to share around or does everyone want to get their own?" That way it's an agreed upon choice.
IMO, to the OP's point, it's NOT 100% expected that you pass around a plate of food that you ordered, it's up to you. Unless the group you're with does that all the time, then it's time to just go with the flow... who knows you might try something you love.
To someone else's point, it drives me crazy when someone says, "let's just split the check X ways", when I've ordered iced tea and just an appetizer because I wasn't hungry, and others have ordered a steak and wine/drinks. If you can't add, just ask and I'll tell you what you owe. But I'm not paying $40 for tea and wings!
I bring a couple pounds of giant shrimp, that way I know I will have something good to eat.
Pretty sure the OP and everyone else are old enough to know what they like. The odds of there being an appetizers that you never had before and are dying to try just a taste of in the level of restaurant that people go to for group dinners is nil.
I know I like crab cakes, I know I don't like stuffed mushrooms. I'll have the crab cakes, if you want to try the crab cakes, order your own.
The argument could be made that the people who want to try everyone else's stuff are the ones that need to grow up and learn to commit to trying a new appetizer if they fancy themselves so damn adventurous. Maybe they should have spent the last 30 years trying new things and learning what they like instead of doing it at an expensive dinner.
Have you ever noticed that the wait staff will place entrees right on the placemat of the person who ordered the entree but they place appetizers in the center of the table?
I wonder why they do that. They do observe thousands upon thousands of people dining together.
When you say appetizers I'm assuming there's dinner coming after. I think it's customary for those to be shared, but I'm with you, I hate that.
However, when someone expectantly says, "Mind if I have a taste of your (entree)?" they usually are already reaching for it, and I sweetly tell them that I will sink my fork in their hand if they do.
Better still, sneeze all over your own appetizer plate.