What are your audition 'red flags'

I was auditioning for a rock band and had only played 1 song when the band leader got really excited and asked me if he could put a band bumper sticker on my car. They were all pretty cool dudes, so I was like "yes...sure" just to be nice. I forgot about it until after the audition, go out there and the "bumper sticker" was in huge letters all across the upper half of my back windshield. lol That butt-ugly sticker was a nightmare to get off and ended up on my car a lot longer than I was with the band....I guess that was a pretty literal bad sign of things to come.

On the other side of things, a band I was in was running auditions for a country lead vocalist. The only guy that could carry a tune, didn't mention that he was living in his car with his whole family until several weeks after the audition...it was in the winter. Immediately before this revelation I had let him borrow one of my acoustic guitars. We all tried really hard to be a good influences and have some empathy for those folks, but he couldn't memorize lyrics to save his life and ended up wasting like 6 months of our time. I think one of the guys in the band even gave him a couple hundred bucks. Singing in a country cover band should have been so far down on his priority list that it was infuriating to watch. Every single week was a new disaster. I try to be a bit more hands-on with auditions now.

 

I forgot one. A group I played with was auditioning a new bass player. The guy we chose played well, and knew most of the songs in the audition. After he joined, he gradually showed his intolerance for those who didn't do things the way he thought they should be done, in the political sense. Gradually his anger issues began to show. I gave notice for a variety of reasons, and on my very last night, he flipped out on me during the last song of the last set. I beat a hasty retreat that night, as I thought he might become physically violent. I stayed in touch with the singer, and he later informed me of a weird, sudden departure by this bass player some months later. to keep it brief, his reason for leaving was an obvious lie. I told my singer friend this. He later found out I had been correct.

Also, as we went along, he quit learning the tunes he needed to know. He *never* was able to correctly play Tulsa Time (it can't much easier than that) but the fact that it was a four measure phrase, with three measures of "E" followed by one measure of "B" really tripped him up, no matter how much time we spent with him on it.

Anyway, short of some sort of interpersonal diagnosis of personality test, how would we have known?

 

I won't try to tell you it isn't fraught with difficulty, but adopting that attitude is sort of like reading a book on shark attacks and deciding you won't swim in the ocean anymore.

Don't let it ruin things for you.

 

Over 50 but still wearing an ACDC T-shirt.

 

Over 50 wearing shorts, T-Shirt and a baseball cap looking like an adult version of Beaver Cleaver.

 

We were looking for a third guitar. I emailed songs to this guy and later talk to him on the phone to set up a jam. While on the phone he tells me my singer is no good and he has some one that can do better and then wants me to rent a rehearsal space for the whole band so he can decide if we are good enough for him since he can bring to the table his fantastic songs (our first album came out in the eighties and got radio play). He owned his own company and it was obvious that he had to be in charge.

 

I want but two things: Play Live, Record.
I ask a LOT of questions to sus out the good from the bad.

My first line of questions revolve around up and coming shows and, what the Band is all about.
Past shows?
Rehearsals?
Equipment? Anybody know how to ring out the feedback in the monitors?
Mic the Drums?
I do.

But, in the end, there is no reward without taking a risk.
YEP!!!

 

Hmmm... I actually might pay to download that.

 

Showing up naked

 

Isn't that pretty much the guitar forum demographic???

 

Poops on stage......not making it up......

 

Bingo! How the heck can you get a good tone with only 15 pedals!
!

 

Guitar player wants to play solos all night long.

Wait, that's me. Explains my career.

 

the 'leader' insisted we practice twice a week every week at HIS house, even though there were no gigs booked.... basically he wanted people to come to his house and be his backing track.

 

We auditioned a guitar player who was awesome, but then proceeded to tell us he doesn’t have time for a band. Another guitar player who didn’t have an amp but was getting one. We were looking for a rhythm guitar player, the candidate kept wanting to play solos.


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I once asked Robbie Bachman drummer for BTO , what advice he could give a budding musician
this is what he replied :

Never carry anyone, either with equipment or with their talent
implying
A) if they dont have their own gear, get them outt
B) if they dont have the chops to pull it off , let them go
C) never carry their personal baggage with in the band

for me its no , and I mean no rockstar personas, period , you dig the trenches with the rest of us
no drug issues while performing

after that its all talent, creativity and fun

 

And now I've gotta write a song about my colonoscopy. Thanks a lot.

 

make no assumptions, an audition is a two way street for the band and the one auditioning. Both are auditioning each other with limited time window

Noodling and too much talking , not enough listening

hormones elevated , guitar players outdoing each other

No audition should take place without a predetermined set, 3, 4 or 5 songs etc. Does the band even know these songs or does the one auditioning know them better than the band ?

No politics, no alcohol , no drugs

allow the one being auditioned to show his or her stuff, give them all the room they need to make it or break it. If they are invited to the audition, let them audition.

NEVER make a commitment at an audition , either way.

 

I auditioned as rhythm guitar player and when it was over the BL (and bass player/singer) says he won't make it to the next 3 rehearsals so could I fill in on bass/vocals. This really happened.

When you audition a drummer and they beat the living daylights out of your kit (had to replace 3 drum heads after that one).

My biggest red flag/pet peeve is someone coming to audition and not being prepared (we always provide a list of 5 songs).