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What are your audition 'red flags'

Discussion in 'Band Wagon' started by briany, May 17, 2019.

  1. basher

    basher Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    Ha, your post popped up as I was writing about just that same thing. WTF is up with that? It's like a fish saying he isn't a swimmer.
     
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  2. TeleFunk Man

    TeleFunk Man Tele-Afflicted

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    Bass player with 15 or more pedals.
     
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  3. TeleFunk Man

    TeleFunk Man Tele-Afflicted

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    A married or dating couple in the band...big no, no for me....
     
  4. matrix

    matrix Tele-Meister

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    - 2 points for showing up with a bottle of whisky in his jacket
    + 0.5 points if he offers to share
    - 1 point for suggesting that we "jam on d" instead of trying to learn the changes. to anything
    - 3 points for tripping over the drum kit
    - 7 points for patchouli
    - 2 points for needing a smoke break after a 3 minute song.
     
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  5. Tim Disney

    Tim Disney TDPRI Member

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    This is probably more of a millennial issue, but my biggest problem is with people planning and talking and not taking any action. Like not even getting to the point that an audition/experimental practice takes place.

    I know too many people my age who will start a conversation and then drop out in the middle, or simply avoid answering pointed questions because "yes" or "no" is too much of a commitment or something. Clear communication is a rare commodity. This can happen with anything, not limited to music at all. Like simply getting together to hang or go out. I know a lot of people who will complain that they are excited to do something but they "know it won't happen".
    I used to be pretty bad about this myself, but it's something I noticed happening a while ago and I made it a point to work on it. Why bother planning something if you don't really intend to do it?

    I guess my biggest gripe is that it's gotten hard to find people who are willing to put work and effort into something in order to achieve something that they actually want. Laziness?
     
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  6. basher

    basher Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    An indicator that I'm probably not a good fit for a band is if I'm the only one with tattoos.
     
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  7. joealso

    joealso Tele-Holic

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    They sat that's how Bill Wyman got the gig. He had a PA and a van.
     
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  8. SecretSquirrel

    SecretSquirrel Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    My girlfriend and I are (were?) the core of our (former?) band. People sometimes assume that we form a bloc, ready to outvote the others. Ha! We disagree on more than not. But we're always ready to put the music first.
     
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  9. Digital Larry

    Digital Larry Friend of Leo's

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    Not to mention 3 original songs in a row about his colonoscopy! A little goes a long way with that sort of thing.
     
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  10. AJ Love

    AJ Love Friend of Leo's

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    If I suck, I probably am not a good fit for the band.
     
  11. brookdalebill

    brookdalebill Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

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    Eeeeew, deal breaker!
     
  12. Telecastoff1

    Telecastoff1 Tele-Afflicted

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    A lot of the above. But once in a while they'll fool ya. They play great, sing great, have good equipment and everything seems to fall in place perfectly. Advance three months....and that person has turned into a pumpkin on ya. Bad, outrageous attitude, can't really play what you need him to, wants to change the band and suddenly wants to be the leader...because 30 years prior he had his own band...UGH! More of that kind of crap than I can care to list. So now, when someone auditions for a spot and they seem too good to be true, I have to start wondering why they aren't presently in a band. Big red flag these days for me.
     
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  13. Digital Larry

    Digital Larry Friend of Leo's

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    Sigh... back to the drawing board I guess. As far as a compelling dramatic story with an emotional arc, I'd say it's up there with most rock operas. I'd already worked out some of the stage design and choreography... where's Ken Russell when you need him!!??
     
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  14. 1300 E Valencia

    1300 E Valencia Friend of Leo's

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    If I did "everything else right", and didn't get the gig, THAT is a big red flag.
    Also, "pre-interviews" where there's no music played, and you are grilled by two sycophantic band members before even meeting the oh-so fabulous lead singer. Yes, she ended up being a looker, had pipes but couldn't count to four.
    No. Thank. You.
     
  15. getbent

    getbent Telefied Silver Supporter

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    hey man, I kind of liked 'my muddy river runs clean again' had a nice loping rhythm to it... and the way he introduced it as being a song from his EP 'songs in the key of bunghole' was pretty clever.
     
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  16. getbent

    getbent Telefied Silver Supporter

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    during aqualung if snot actually ran down their nose.
     
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  17. beyer160

    beyer160 Friend of Leo's

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    I've never felt the need to have any rules, you just kinda know. Like the time I auditioned for a band and the rhythm guitarist laid on the floor with a vocal mic pointing down so he could sing. He wasn't drunk, just couldn't be bothered to stand. Before anybody played a note I knew it wasn't gonna work. Then I figured out the singer and the keyboard player were a couple, which really sealed the deal. It's bad enough being in a band with siblings, but you never, ever EVER want to be in a band with a couple.

    Then we started playing and their songs were terrible, so I was vindicated. The only problem then was how to get my SVT up the stairs so I could escape.
     
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  18. Mid Life Crisis

    Mid Life Crisis Poster Extraordinaire

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    When you say to the auditionee "OK, let's start off with [song title 1 from the audition list you sent him three weeks ago]" and they go "Huh? How does that one go?"
     
  19. RoyBGood

    RoyBGood Doctor of Teleocity

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    Wearing an ABBA T-shirt.
     
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  20. schmee

    schmee Doctor of Teleocity

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    Too loud, unless your band is also loud. Then he's trying to hear himself!
    Drummer with no finesse, just hard hitting.
    Inability to hear dynamic changes.
    Singers: Pitchy.
    Mechanical playing, not getting in the groove and feel.
    Drummer that can't "feel" and needs to be counted to come in if the music is already going.
    Over playing everything.
     
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