Well....the universe did its thing, again, last night

EugeneWeemich

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A young man, 15 years old, ...a good kid, lost his life, yesterday.

He did nothing wrong. Was out rowing with boat club teammates in the evening; a good, healthy activity.

Had a medical event, an epileptic seizure, rolled out and disappeared in front of his friends and escort boat. Murky river water. Coach jumped in right after and could not locate.

An hour later, rescue people found him and brought him back to the dock, where his parents were waiting.

Just Gone.

And that's that. Life.

I did not know him. believe his name was Leo. My wife rows there and I've kayaked those waters. Not turbulent...just easily murky.

It's just really one of those double-middle fingers to the sky moments, where all you can do is sit in the dirt afterwards, and nothing helps.

Despite my theological degree, am not a believer in thoughts/prayers/heaven, etc. more of a quantum deterministic person which is a very cold way of looking at things, I know.

yet I'm here, I see i feel, maybe, who knows how/why things tick.

so, if you've got a spiritual connection to something, put in a good word for the family, who, I am guessing, are in a real tough place right now. And his teammates and coach, also.

Rolled out and gone....and there's the existence we abide in.

Sorry to dump this on you. You're just some of the best and I've no one else I care to commiserate with at 1:00 a.m.
 
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getbent

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when youngster die senselessly... if it is possible, we feel the hurt sharply and our attempts to create reason and order are proven wrong in dramatic fashion. Maybe John Donne says it best... when we have a sense of loss that screams the loudest silence.... maybe it is Mac Sledge when he learns of his young daughter's death and he says, "I have never trusted happiness, not for one minute, I would not trust happiness as far as I could throw it."


No man is an island,
Entire of itself.
Each is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
As well as if a promontory were.
As well as if a manor of thine own
Or of thine friend's were.
Each man's death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
Therefore, send not to know
For whom the bell tolls,
It tolls for thee.



You feel this loss deeply and I feel that too. I am proud of you for grieving but I hope it does not consume you.
 

chris m.

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Was he known to be epileptic? It’s sad as hell, regardless, but possibly even more so because any epileptic should be wearing a life jacket when in an open boat. If doing athletic rowing, they make these light weight, minimalist ones that automatically inflate from a CO2 cartridge once they’re submerged a couple of feet.
 

gimmeatele

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In my time in the police i saw the unpredictable consequence of death many times, it's something you never seem to come to terms however much you come into contact with death and sudden death in particular.
I gave up trying to fathom out reasons, it's is as you say, part of the universe.
 

Skyhook

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Was he known to be epileptic? It’s sad as hell, regardless, but possibly even more so because any epileptic should be wearing a life jacket when in an open boat. If doing athletic rowing, they make these light weight, minimalist ones that automatically inflate from a CO2 cartridge once they’re submerged a couple of feet.

With as much respect as possible(apologies if that's not enough):

2AqXu9ud_400x400.jpg
 

telemnemonics

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My wife asked me today, how many times I should have been dead.
(I thought of starting a thread asking how many times you almost died, I'm sure there's plenty of stories here)
One memorable NOT was at 15, landed on my head in what I didn't know was a shallow part in the middle of a swimming pool.
Had a headache and neck pain ever since.
46 years is a long headache but it beats the alternative.

I can think the teen is a poor kid but it might be more true that living to adulthood makes us rich and lucky. Especially compared to kids in war torn Middle Eastern and African countries.
I mean of course it's sad but I don't know the kid and can't say his life is more important than any other kid who died today.
I'm not so much cold as saddened for more than one lost life.
Death is a thing we may turn away from and make into a special event but it's more like breathing. Lifted my Mother after she passed, just like pets who died on my lap or with head in my hand, mortality is in us and we get a bit of time then become fertilizer again.
I can fell the lives, and also feel the deaths of passed loved ones, if that makes sense.

Sorry for the family and friends, and the boy who one hopes is at peace.
Some believe a bit of time after death is terrifying.
I'd fix him a meal and remind him I'm thinking of him if he was my kid.
You know, just in case.
 
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EugeneWeemich

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Was he known to be epileptic? It’s sad as hell, regardless, but possibly even more so because any epileptic should be wearing a life jacket when in an open boat. If doing athletic rowing, they make these light weight, minimalist ones that automatically inflate from a CO2 cartridge once they’re submerged a couple of feet.

He was. not sure if the boat club was aware.

Agree on the precautionary measures.
 

EugeneWeemich

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My wife asked me today, how many times I should have been dead.
(I thought of starting a thread asking how many times you almost died, I'm sure there's plenty of stories here)
One memorable NOT was at 15, landed on my head in what I didn't know was a shallow part in the middle of a swimming pool.
Had a headache and neck pain ever since.
46 years is a long headache but it beats the alternative.

I can think the teen is a poor kid but it might be more true that living to adulthood makes us rich and lucky. Especially compared to kids in war torn Middle Eastern and African countries.
I mean of course it's sad but I don't know the kid and can't say his life is more important than any other kid who died today.
I'm not so much cold as saddened for more than one lost life.
Death is a thing we may turn away from and make into a special event but it's more like breathing. Lifted my Mother after she passed, just like pets who died on my lap or with head in my hand, mortality is in us and we get a bit of time then become fertilizer again.
I can fell the lives, and also feel the deaths of passed loved ones, if that makes sense.

Sorry for the family and friends, and the boy who one hopes is at peace.
Some believe a bit of time after death is terrifying.
I'd fix him a meal and remind him I'm thinking of him if he was my kid.
You know, just in case.

Post your thread idea. I'm sure you'll get a number of great responses. Can think of 3 moments that easily come to mind.

17 years ago i escorted my older sister to that dark door on the mountain. 47 years old... and cancer. listened to the last beat of her heart. hard, final, moment. had to call mom after.

just hope I go before my kids.
 

Muadzin

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I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair. Then I thought, 'wouldn't it be much worse if life *were* fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?' So now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.
Marcus Cole, Babylon 5

I take great comfort in this philosophy myself.
 

ChicknPickn

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C.S. Lewis, in his book "The Problem of Pain," was writing after losing his wife to cancer. He wrestled with the question of why such a dear person had to suffer so much. Where was God? His epiphany, after his journey through grief, was that the world is absolutely logical. Examine any event, no matter how sad or tragic, and you see why it had to happen in a universe that is orderly. While we tend to pay attention to how this brings tragedy, one can see that it works in our favor, too. For instance, our bodies are designed with powerful self-healing mechanisms, and for the most part, those things work day after day. And then, there is the miracle that we have ever had life in the first place. As the Buddha said, to have this human life is less likely than finding a particular grain of sand on a beach.
 

Fuelish

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As someone who has had a history of szs, and they rear their ugly head every year or two, now, pretty well controlled if I control my stress levels - docs have never found a "cause," so to speak.....after reading a lot after I starting having them as an adult, I seem to recall the ancients (Greeks? ) used to believe that when you had a sz, you were "touched by the gods" .......I'm tired of being touched, thank you very much. So sorry for the kid's family/friends/acquaintances, that's horrible. I used to love white water rafting and mountainbiking......kinda scares me nowadays. Although, it's weird, I could have one, a big one, and snap right back out of it and be fine, fully alert and oriented, usually not having bitten my tongue nor peed my pants, which happens, and is not fun.
My wife is used to it now, I'll "come to," she'll ask me if I'm OK..."Yeah, why?" "You just had a sz...." "No I didn't...." The human brain is a strange thing....the med I take is proven effective, but they don't know exactly how it works (Used to be a nurse, had access to all kinds of med info at work).
Well, as much as his situation sucked, he was loved, will be missed, it happened doing something he enjoyed, and he was "touched by the gods" ... peace and love
 

Rufus

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JFK was on record as stating that this was his favorite poem...

I Have a Rendezvous with Death

BY ALAN SEEGER

I have a rendezvous with Death
At some disputed barricade,
When Spring comes back with rustling shade
And apple-blossoms fill the air—
I have a rendezvous with Death
When Spring brings back blue days and fair.

It may be he shall take my hand
And lead me into his dark land
And close my eyes and quench my breath—
It may be I shall pass him still.
I have a rendezvous with Death
On some scarred slope of battered hill,
When Spring comes round again this year
And the first meadow-flowers appear.

God knows 'twere better to be deep
Pillowed in silk and scented down,
Where Love throbs out in blissful sleep,
Pulse nigh to pulse, and breath to breath,
Where hushed awakenings are dear ...
But I've a rendezvous with Death
At midnight in some flaming town,
When Spring trips north again this year,
And I to my pledged word am true,
I shall not fail that rendezvous.
Source: A Treasury of War Poet (1917)

Personally, I have always preferred the Stevenson Requiem:

Requiem
Robert Louis Stevenson - 1850-1894


Under the wide and starry sky,
Dig the grave and let me lie.
Glad did I live and gladly die,
And I laid me down with a will.

This be the verse you grave for me:
Here he lies where he longed to be;
Home is the sailor, home from sea,
And the hunter home from the hill
.

 




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