THE Toilet Paper Thread

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by Torren61, Mar 29, 2020.

  1. Torren61

    Torren61 Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    I recently binge watched Mad Men. Remember, there was a group of ad people who came up with and pitched these commercials to the customer who signed off on them before they were made.









    How fun would it have been to write this skit?

     
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  2. Mike Eskimo

    Mike Eskimo Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I just watched the whole thing over the last month or so too.

    I was shocked what I didn’t remember and what I misremembered. :eek:

    It was advertising-heavy the whole way through even though I remembered them slacking off toward the end.

    Slattery stole every scene he was in, Peggy was the heart of the show, Dick Whitman often lived up to his name, Anna Draper was a great character and I loved every scene set in Cali - especially early when Dick/Don takes off on Pete and he ends up in Palm Springs, how you could tell Matt Weiner hated Betty from the get-go and gave her the cruelest exit/wrap-up, how they mercilessly bagged on Jaguar E-types even when Layne was trying to kill himself ...:lol:

    Great show
     
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  3. koen

    koen Friend of Leo's

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    There may be a TP shortage, but certainly no TP thread shortage :cool:
     
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  4. Switchy

    Switchy Tele-Holic

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    Before you may claim the title of "THE Toilet Paper" thread, you must battle all the other TP threads to the death. :twisted:
     
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  5. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Oh toilet paper sweetest darling dear

    Meany is the times you kissed my rear

    Now of you fond memories linger

    As I think of you, and use my finger
     
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  6. Torren61

    Torren61 Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    http://www.toiletpaperhistory.net/toilet-paper-history/history-of-toilet-paper/

    History Of Toilet Paper


    [​IMG]
    Although we take toilet paper for granted, toilet paper has a relatively short history in the modern world.

    In the 2nd century BC Chinese invented wrapping and padding material known as paper. There are many evidences that confirm that they used that paper like toilet paper too.

    In the 6th century CE toilet paper was widely used in China.

    Historically the first modern toilet paper was made in 1391, when it was created for the needs of the Chinese Emperor family. Each sheet of toilet paper was even perfumed. That was toilet paper as we have come to think of it.


    In the late fifteenth century, paper became widely available. However, mass manufacturing of modern toilet paper began in the late 19th century.

    Joseph C. Gayetty created the first commercially packaged toilet paper in 1857. His toilet papers were loose, flat, sheets of paper. Joseph founded The Gayetty Firm for toilet paper production in New Jersey and his first factory-made toilet paper was "The Therapeutic Paper”. This first toilet paper in flat sheets was medicated with aloe. Gayetty named it “Gayetty’s Medicated Paper.” Joseph Gayetty printed his name on every sheet. Unfortunately, this invention failed.

    Thomas Seymour, Edward Irvin and Clarence Wood Scott began selling some kind of toilet paper in Philadelphia in 1867. In 1879, Scott brothers founded the Scott Paper Company. The Scott Paper Company's toilet paper was the first toilet paper sold in rolls. In 1890 the Scott Paper Company made its Waldorf brand toilet paper in rolls.

    In 1871, Zeth Wheeler patents rolled and perforated toilet paper. In 1877 he founded the Albany Perforated Wrapping Paper Company. In 1897, company began selling and marketing standard perforated toilet paper on a roll.

    In 1879, Walter Alcock, a British businessman, created toilet paper on a roll, too. He was the first that used the perforated toilet roll instead of the common flat sheets.

    In 1880 the British Perforated Paper Company began selling toilet paper. That toilet paper was sold in boxes of individual squares.

    In 1885 Oliver Hewlett Hicks patented package of toilet paper and the manufacturing process.

    In 1896, Irvin's son Arthur Scott joined the Scott Paper Company. In 1921 Waldorf brand represented 64% of Scott's total case sales. Company became the leading toilet paper company in the world.

    In 1928, German, Hans Klenk become the first toilet paper rolls seller in Europe.

    In 1942 toilet paper becomes softer, St. Andrew's Paper Mill in England began selling the first two-ply toilet paper. Today two-ply toilet paper is the standard in many countries.

    In 1935 Northern Tissue invented splinter free toilet paper.

    In 1973, America experienced first toilet paper shortage. In December 1973 after one of Carson’s jokes (Johnny Carson, one of America’s most loved comedians) scared consumers into stockpiling supplies.

    At the time, people did not speak of the toilet paper frequently. In conservative era it was 'unmentionable" to talk about this product. However, people had a desire for better hygiene and toilet paper slowly fit into the consumer market.

    Today the manufacture of toilet paper is a large industry. The modern toilet paper has definitely made life much easier and more hygienic for us all.
     
  7. Torren61

    Torren61 Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    http://www.toiletpaperhistory.net/toilet-paper-history/used-before-toilet-paper/

    Before Toilet Paper


    [​IMG]
    What did people use before toilet paper was invented?

    Before the advent of modern toilet paper many different materials were used for the same purposes. Different materials were used depending upon the country, weather conditions, social customs and status.

    People used leaves, grass, ferns, corn cobs, maize, fruit skins, seashells, stone, sand, moss, snow and water. The simplest way was physical use of one's hand. Wealthy people usually used wool, lace or hemp.


    Romans were the cleanest. Wealthy used wool and rosewater and others used sponge attached to a wooden stick, soaked in a bucket of salt water.

    The Greeks would use clay.

    In Coastal Regions, mussel shells were used (and sometimes coconut husk).

    Europeans used hand (but they also used fountains with luxury of warm water).

    People from Islamic cultures used they left hand with little water (they are still doing that today). This is why it is offensive to greet someone with your left hand.

    The Eskimos would use moss or snow.

    The Vikings used wool.

    The Colonial Americans used the core center cobs from shelled ears of corn.

    The Mayans used corn cobs.

    The French invented the first bidet (of course without of modern plumbing).

    The Chinese invented the first toilet paper as we know it in the 14th Century.

    Later people used pages from a books, newspapers, catalogs, etc.
     
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  8. WingedWords

    WingedWords Tele-Afflicted

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    Is it true that Joni Mitchell's famous song (also covered by Judy Collins) is being reissued as part of a public information campaign to maximise the use of TP?
     
  9. Mike Eskimo

    Mike Eskimo Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Moss or snow ?

    Never !
     
  10. memorex

    memorex Friend of Leo's

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  11. thunderbyrd

    thunderbyrd Poster Extraordinaire Silver Supporter

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    some years ago, I read a very unusual book by a former military officer who put forth the belief that all problems between the western world vs the eastern world could be solved by the way we wipe our behinds. I wish I could remember the author's name or the title, but I can't. but the bizarre thing was that by the time you read the whole book, he convinced you he was right.

    I remember that he called the eastern way of wiping "the little bath".

    oh, yeah, one of his other propositions was that children should be taught martial arts so they could handle bullying situations themselves. If there was no more bullying, the human race could evolve into more peaceful and rational pursuits. and once again, he made it sound very credible.
     
  12. flathd

    flathd Poster Extraordinaire

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    Mirror, mirror, on the wall.

    Who is the biggest TP whore' der of them all?
     
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  13. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Not commonly known, but:

    Jesse Chisolm learned on his cattle drive that eating sparingly, eschewing spices altogether, allowed him to limit his bowel movements to approximately one a week. Bouncing around all day in the saddle packed things down nicely in his elementary canal to the point, that if he held off long enough, he could jump from his saddle, take a dump, and remount in under thirty seconds. His anal sphincter had become so strong from holding back the tide so to speak that when Mr. Chisolm made his deposit on the prairie, it snapped back together with such elasticity the deposit was cut so cleanly there was nary a smidgeon of the offending material left upon his person.
     
  14. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    A poster who shall remain unnamed

    had eighty rolls or so he claimed

    Excuse he made, but we all know

    He da king of toilet paper hoes
     
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  15. flathd

    flathd Poster Extraordinaire

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    Here I sit, broken hearted.

    Reached for the TP, and the last roll has departed.
     
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  16. ricknbaker

    ricknbaker Tele-Afflicted

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    badgersarsetoilettissue.jpg
     
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  17. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Grimaced he did as he untied his shoe

    Then he reached for his sock

    After he wiped away the pool do

    Only a little dry brown rock

    He slipped on the sock and put on his shoe
     
  18. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Dear Santa, I know it's a little early, and to tell you the truth, I haven't been all that good, but a lot of that has to do with having to wipe my rear end on stray cats! So, you know, if you ain't too busy and all, if you happen to take your sleigh out to you know, like charge the batteries up, would you mind dropping me a 30 pack of that good Costco toilet paper? I promise I'll try and be a better little boy, and I won't have to spend half my time trapping alley cats.
     
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  19. Guitarteach

    Guitarteach Poster Extraordinaire

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    Go roman... a sponge on a stick.

    Shared too... :(

    4FF10FB8-4BBC-40FF-BC38-222CC005ABDE.jpeg
     
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  20. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    During the aforementioned practices of wiping one's heinie, I'm thinking nose picking wasn't a top priority.
     
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