The TDPRI Limerick Thread

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by TeleTex82, Nov 1, 2015.

  1. TeleTex82

    TeleTex82 Friend of Leo's

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    Howdy,

    I've always gotten a good chuckle out of a well crafted Limerick. I figured with all the creative types round these here parts a thread like this was a no-brainer...

    And now, for my meager contribution

    There once was a man from Lancaster.
    Who loved to collect Telecasters.
    His wife said, "you take it too far,
    it's me or guitars."
    Now he's a single, guitar-slinging bastard.
     
    Last edited: Nov 2, 2015
  2. Tonemonkey

    Tonemonkey Poster Extraordinaire

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    Back in South of England !!
    He came online from San Antone,
    Inviting all to write a poem,
    Expecting all to write five lines
    Well this ones four, looks like you're ******
    Your colleagues can't count and also rude!
     
  3. telexander

    telexander Tele-Meister

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    It once was guitar into amp,
    Simple as licking a stamp,
    Now everyone selects
    Three dozen effects,
    They even come stock on the Champ!
     
  4. TeleTex82

    TeleTex82 Friend of Leo's

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    Brilliant.
     
  5. BigDaddyLH

    BigDaddyLH Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

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    Kelowna, BC, Canuckistan
    ... Having trouble rhyming "intestinal blockage"...
     
  6. TeleTex82

    TeleTex82 Friend of Leo's

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    Too soon!
     
  7. fendertx

    fendertx Poster Extraordinaire Ad Free + Supporter

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    Sausage, now let's hear it
     
  8. scrimmer

    scrimmer Tele-Afflicted

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    North Carolina
    Sitting here with intestinal blockage
    From eating way too much sausage
    Becoming regular and clear
    Is impossible I fear
    Now my gut has become a mere hostage


    ...I figured someone's gotta do it, so why not me! :p
     
  9. TeleTex82

    TeleTex82 Friend of Leo's

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    Well done sir...
     

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  10. uriah1

    uriah1 Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Around
    Once had a stomp from the bronx
    Tried to play rock but could only play funk
     
  11. scrimmer

    scrimmer Tele-Afflicted

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    57
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    North Carolina

    (In my best Elvis voice)
    Thank you. Thank you very much.
     
  12. Jupiter

    Jupiter Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Osaka, Japan
    I once played a gig in Nantucket,

    ah, better not...
     
  13. Paul in Colorado

    Paul in Colorado Telefied Ad Free Member

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    R.I.P. 2019
    There once was a man from Capri
    Who could buy Telecasters duty-free.
    He'd load up a box
    And ship them by ox
    But he never sold more then just three
     
  14. ravindave_3600

    ravindave_3600 Friend of Leo's

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    Newly Indiana
    There was an old picker from Tucson
    Who said as he strummed with his hat on
    "My tone's always sweeter
    On this old Tele beater
    Than a Les Paul or PRS Dragon."
     
  15. kelnet

    kelnet Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Port Moody, BC
    My bass player recently said
    "I've been writing some songs in my head."
    I said, "Good for you,"
    "But the thing you should do,"
    "Is learn our set list instead."
     
  16. lendryesky

    lendryesky Tele-Afflicted

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    The one about the guy from Nantucket is highly exaggerated. I was at the urinal next to him one time.
     
  17. Sandia Man

    Sandia Man Tele-Meister

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    Albuquerque, NM
    With paint and a cheap Telecaster
    And nothing but basics to master
    The getting it right
    Takes all day and night
    But the screwing it up happens faster
     
  18. dlew919

    dlew919 Poster Extraordinaire

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    A blonde telecaster is best
    Unless you are sunburst impressed
    Black maybe cheaper
    it don't matter: keep her
    The twang makes us all want the rest.
     
  19. ColonelPanic

    ColonelPanic Tele-Meister

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    Yorkshire, England.
    There was a chap from the UK,
    His Telecaster sounded all day.
    With an almighty twang,
    His amp then went BANG,
    And frightened the ladies away.
     
  20. ColonelPanic

    ColonelPanic Tele-Meister

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    Yorkshire, England.
    There once was a man from Manhattan,
    Who struggled, with a flat-picking pattern.
    His fingers eroded,
    His head then exploded,
    After trying to play Danny Gatton.
     
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