Snake story.


Poster Extraordinaire
Jun 28, 2019
left coast
This is a true story, only the swear words have been changed to protect the innocent.

I've caught a few snakes in my time.
I worked as a wildlife rescuer for 6 years and my specialty was reptiles of all types, snakes lizards....lizards and snakes...and that's it, luckily I live on the mid north coast of NSW so no crocodiles for me.
My tale starts as they all did with a call from the phone operator from WIRES (Wildlife,Information rescue service).
Jimmy we have a single mother with 5 kids who says she has a snake in her roof and could I come and take it away.
This was strange because I technically wasn't allowed in roofs to catch anything for insurance reasons but being stupid I said OK, I'd done it before so no problems, it could only be a carpet python and I'd caught hundreds of them so no worries.
I get to her house and she walks me inside and shows me the kitchen skylight and sure enough there's the silhouette of a snake lying on top of the skylight sunning itself, the skylight is in the corner of the kitchen not far from the edge of the roof so there won't be much room for me inside but she's worried and a little bit cute so of I go.
I scramble my way to the skylight and eventually get myself close enough to touch it, I'm sitting on a roof beam, my knees are up around my ears and I'm hunched over with very little room to operate, I have my snake bag and snake stick(modified golf club with a padded end for holding them down or herding them into the bag) with me and things are very claustrophobic.
The skylight has a corrugated foil surround and I see I can probably just lift one side of it up and grab old snakey and just stick it in the bag so with my the end of my snake stick I slowly lift up the edge of the foil surround, as I lift i start to see scales and so I lift further and further and I keep seeing the same scales from the same snake and I suddenly realise this particular snake might be a big one so I decide I'm going to lift the remainder of the foil up quickly and try and grab the beasty behind it's head and just cram it into the bag.
I jerk the foil up fast and freeze, lying their looking at me is the largest carpet python I've ever seen and it's not alone, what I've stumbled upon is a mating ball, basically a snake orgy where several males will copulated with the same female.
Hold your hand at arms length in front of your face, that's how big it's head was.
Having been disturbed the horror ball now starts unraveling and the huge female starts crawling out straight into my lap.
I can't do anything, carpet pythons are insanely strong and this one is massive so I sit there all hunched up in a freaking roof while snakezilla takes a leisurely crawl over me and disappears into the roof beams.
When I was sure she was gone I made a valiant effort and managed to catch two of the males both of which were of a respectable size but had to leave two other males and the giant behind as God himself couldn't have gotten me back in that roof.
The next day the guy who taught me how to wrangle reptiles came around and finished the job, he simply lifted the skylight out and dumped the big girl into a bag...wish I had of thought of that.
End of story.

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oh wow! great story great picture thanks for posting!