She who must be obeyed to do list.

[Blue Bill]

TD, I'm with you, brother. I guess I'm semi-retired carpenter, 'cause every few weeks, I can look for a job outside the house, so I can get some rest.

This cracked me up:

 

[Toto'sDad]

TD, did she just make you say that? Is she there now?? Making you repeat that mantra, again and again?! If you can’t talk just blink, once for yes, twice for no.
We’re here for you! I mean not all of us, obviously. But some of us. Some of them. (Personally I’d love to help but I’ve got a list in front of me that you just wouldn’t believe.)

I appreciate the offer, but I know, that anyone who understands the position I'm in already has plenty to do. It should have been a clue when we say, "I do." Cause what that means, I do this, and I do that, until my wife runs out of things for me to "do."

 

[Toto'sDad]

TD, I'm with you, brother. I guess I'm semi-retired carpenter, 'cause every few weeks, I can look for a job outside the house, so I can get some rest.

This cracked me up:

View attachment 1056912

Old Mickey Rooney used to say, if I can get away with it, I don't fill out the marriage license 'cause I can use it again next time I get married.

 

[Toto'sDad]

I don’t mind a list. In fact I need one. If left to my own devices nothing will get done. But this? This is…Just. Not. Right.
Knowing absolutely nothing about your situation, my guess is that there’s something about you which she envies and which she therefore finds annoying. And for that you will pay. It’s the only explanation that makes sense, damnit!
Ps, if she gifts you with an apron for Christmas, game over. View attachment 1056888

How did you know what she gets me for Christmas? EVERY YEAR!

 

[Toto'sDad]

Sounds like it's too late to right that ship. Now you know why men don't live as long as women.

The poor things are plumb tuckered out from all the honey dos.

 

[Toto'sDad]

Suck it up and give your wife a big hug and a kiss and tell her you love her. Life is short and is full of hard work, disappointments and strife. I try to not drive my lovely wife crazy and dump more stuff on us that we are already bearing. I'm blessed that we found each other and that we endured this crazy life for over 21 years. She puts up with my crap and I with hers. I wouldn't have it any other way.

I do all of that, and besides all of that, I caddy for my wife. She had the audacity to pick her own club yesterday and chunked one into the hole from off the green on the hardest hole on the golf course!

 

[Matt Sarad]

I must buy new Christmas lights. Saturday will be the Tree. All the leaves have been blown off the roof, onto the yard. and into the street. I fixed her lunch and drove her to work.

Who thought that the second wife was going to be an improvement?

 

[Toto'sDad]

Hope the misses doesn't read your post But if she does, just tell her you were bragging and not complaining (suggestion based on P Thought comment).

My wife doesn't read these posts, if she did, I'd have been dead a long time ago.

 

[Toto'sDad]

That is best handled as a "tacit understanding".

I'm pretty sure I don't understand DB's question, or your answer!

 

[Toto'sDad]

I must buy new Christmas lights. Saturday will be the Tree. All the leaves have been blown off the roof, onto the yard. and into the street. I fixed her lunch and drove her to work.

Who thought that the second wife was going to get an improvement?

I sometimes think back to those days when on Saturday she used to fix me a giant rib steak, potatoes, and eggs breakfast, and asked me if I would like anything else? Now it's a box of Cheerios and be quiet I'm watching the news!

 

[Toto'sDad]

Happy wife
Happy Life.
Keep up the good work TD.
Methinks she's workin' those pounds off you that you're worried about.
Mrs. TD obviously cares about you.

If I didn't like the program, I would have quit it a long time ago!

 

[David Barnett]

Old Mickey Rooney used to say, if I can get away with it, I don't fill out the marriage license 'cause I can use it again next time I get married.

Wasn't he also the one who said "Next time I think I want to get married, I'm just going to find some b**** I hate and give her half my stuff"?

 

[Toto'sDad]

Wasn't he also the one who said "Next time I think I want to get married, I'm just going to find some b**** I hate and give her half my stuff"?

I don't know but it sounds like Mickey!

 

[David Barnett]

I don't know but it sounds like Mickey!

I've also heard it attributed to Rod Stewart

 

[fretknot]

Sounds like a cross between a Country song and The Blues.