Quit drinking last weekend...

When my Dad died, I didn't realize how much my drinking had picked up, until I almost killed myself and a very good friend who had just become a father. I quit drinking cold turkey, for 365 days with no cheating. On the 366th day I drank a beer. Fortunately I can set a limit and keep it, and I Uber if I'm going out and having drinks. I think it's a personal choice for most, sickness for some.

 

That's more of the European approach.

 

I guess Joe Cocker was a heavy alcoholic, after getting sober, he continued drinking in moderation...probably an exception to the rule..[/QUOTE]

Nobody ever always and nevers. Who knows? There's always exceptions, but it's usually someone else, not me

 

i dont drink or do anything of the sort. Life is too short to waste it not in clarity! Good on you stepping up for your kid.

 

Excellent advice. It MAY send you down another road you do not want to go down.

 

I created a post and then deleted it. I could have offered advice had he request it in the OP. My opinion doesn't matter here because I don't know the OP and based upon what he posted, he may just be a binge drinker and not an alcoholic.
He didn't ask specifically about the 12 steps nor did he say he is an alcoholic. If someone wants to know about addiction recovery and/or the 12 step program I could tell them about it.
I decided I didn't need to offer anything in this thread and that's why I deleted what I initially posted.
I'm out of this thread now.

 

To the OP.

Without reading all this, just your initial post.

Good for you, way to look out for yourself and your kid.

 

I guess Joe Cocker was a heavy alcoholic, after getting sober, he continued drinking in moderation...probably an exception to the rule..[/QUOTE]

We can guess all sorts of things and much of our speculation here is guessing.
Generally anyone who can drink in moderation is not someone who cannot drink in moderation. Cannot drink in moderation: AKA an alcoholic.

This is where guessing and presuming that all daily drinkers are alcoholics (etc) is a real problem in the process of actually understanding the problem.
Not that understanding is required or even possible on a large scale.

Before AA was formed the medical community had done lots of R&D trying to "treat" alcoholism, and had finally concluded that it was hopeless and there was no medical solution.
They of course had some success with drinkers who were able to either stop or moderate.
They labeled the drinkers who could not stop or moderate: alcoholics.
That was and is a medical term.
Not a moral brand.
Not a social commentary.

Many drinkers drink a lot, and then when it becomes a problem they quit.
For laypersons to label everyone who ever drank or drinks a lot alcoholics, is like diagnosing everyone who coughs a lot as having lung cancer.

The courts send lots of cons with DUIs to AA, but a DUI doesn't make the driver into an alcoholic.
Neither does any 12 step program diagnose whoever walks in to a meeting; with one of the medical problems like alcoholism or addiction.
Most drinkers can stop drinking and many can even drink in moderation, what is meant by alcoholic is a medical term, and those with that medical problem are literally on a suicide mission.

Addiction is the core of alcoholism, and the distinction is easier to see in the addict.
IV users will keep using while their limbs literally rot off.
Drinkers who stop when drinking becomes an inconvenience are clearly not alcoholics in the medical definition.

We do not know if the OP is an alcoholic.
But the OP posted about his first attempt to quit drinking here.
So what we are seeing is a typical cross section of society sharing their individual experiences and beliefs about quitting drinking.
Which is more often done by those who are not alcoholics!

 

According to Welcome to Marwen, wearing high heels, (like I know you do sometimes) can lead to trouble, a LOT of trouble.

 

It's not po-lite the go sneakin and peakin.

 

I know an apology is in order but your ankles, they are such a delight, the urge to see them was overpowering.

 

Wow!

 

Two liters of wine seems like a lot to me. 0.375L (two glasses) is where I stop enjoying it.
For me the danger in Jack and Coke lies in the caffeine.
I still use a jigger for preparing Spirits based drinks. Limit 3 oz/Day.
You guys are way ahead of me or I’m behind.

 

(Gets out pencil)
Glass of wine: 150ml
Bottle of wine: 750ml
Glasses/bottle: 5

SoOOOooo Two litres is more than two bottles, about 13 glasses of wine.

 

Great to see all the interesting drinking suggestions!

I wonder how our friend @Axegrinder77 is doing with not drinking?
My wife will be having a bottle tonight and I'll go to a meeting while she imbibes.
I have no problem being around drinkers drinking but it gets a bit lonesome if I'm the only one not in on what makes random stuff so funny or interesting.
Watching people get drunk is really pretty boring, while the drinkers clearly think it's great.
I do recall how much it enhanced having fun, and the lower inhibitions also made it easier to say certain stuff.
For romance though it never really enhanced that sort of, uh, activity.

@Toto'sDad covered the uninhibited speech pretty well...

Again, it's all good until somebody loses an eye!

 

Alcoholism and "drinking" are not the same thing at all, and this thread includes many mostly well-intentioned comments and advice that are dangerously wrong. Alcoholism runs strong in my family and I can say with complete certainty that real addiction to alcohol has no cure -- medical science is not committed to developing one, as the profit is in treating relapse, not "curing" the condition -- so true alcoholics need to find the admirable courage, treatment, and support systems to achieve their own sobriety. If you are a true alcoholic, you will be challenged to accomplish this, but it can be done. Alcohol abuse, which is not alcoholism, is more common and van be addressed in a variety of ways. And since the abuser has more agency in the abuse, making changes becomes much more possible. Addicts cannot choose; abusers (to some degree) can. Having a true alcoholic follow methods that might work for an abuser is not merely a waste of time; it will actually make things worse by fostering inevitable failure, relapse, and despair. To the OP: you have made a courageous choice that others will support with lip service but which they will never really understand. You will be surrounded by aggressive invitations to relapse. Read some of Eric Clapton's common-sense, non-pitying descriptions of his fight -- as a true addict -- and you will find some inspiration to reinforce your own quiet heroism. Great accomplishments are hard.

 

there it is, BINGO! Sometimes relapse is as much a part of the getting it, as staying clean and sober.
My sobriety is not based on working a good program , what ever in the hell that is, I have no idea.
It' fear. Fear of going back out there and going through all that pain and suffering involved in all the self hatred and denial while watching my life , so called turn into a great big steaming heap of pooh. and being endlessly lost in addiction.
that scares the pooh out of me, It seems to work for me despite what 37 years of hearing the neigh Sayers telling me how wrong I am an how fowled up my program is.
I mean it only has to work one day at a time, right, it's so simple, I like simple. so I keep it that way