My Daughter on a Colombo mission.

Toto'sDad

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Yesterday afternoon, my daughter called and asked if we were busy, that her and her husband wanted to stop by. We're always happy to see them both so we said c'mon over! When they arrived, she told me that I had mentioned that I thought I had found where my Dad was buried up in Washington. Since she knew all about her mom's family, she decided to delve into mine. I said that I wasn't for sure him that I only thought I'd found where he had died. She said c'mon I'll prove it to you.

We went to my computer, she pulled up his obituary, where I was named as his only son. It was a short obituary, but revealed a lot, that he still knew my name, that someone thought enough of him to put an obituary in the paper, not once but twice in two different papers, and that he is laid to rest in an actual grave, and not incinerated and scattered somewhere.

Additionally, she had done research, found my mother and father's marriage license, several mentions of them as a couple and individually in a Census. She had pictures of some of the gravestones of my folks who had passed before I was born, one was of my great grandmother. She had traced my family back a very long way, people I never knew existed. My head was swimming when she left, but I felt strangely at peace.

My daughter remarked to her mother that mom had always known her family and knew where they had come from and what they were about. She said that she always thought of me as sort of a loner without a past. She undertook something for mine, and her edification, and I'm glad she did. I'm at peace to know where my dad is, even though he's been gone since June of 1971, somehow, I have closure on him. We had the greatest adventures a father and son could ever have in 1951, twenty years before he passed.

Though I was bitter at his leaving me for the last time when I was ten years old, and angry at the treatment I received at his hands, the fact remains, he introduced me to the road of life at an age when most kids have never been more than a block from home. We had many great adventures. Adios Daddy, go with God.
 

getbent

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My ex wife went on a big genealogy kick and hunted up a bunch of stuff about my mom's family, she even took some trips to collect artifacts and things that 'in her mind' would be appreciated by my mom. She DID ask me if I thought it was a good idea and I said, 'My mom is smart, has tons of resources, knows everyone's skill sets, if she wanted this, she would ask for it. If YOU just are curious, well, go ahead, but I'd be very careful about sharing any of the information.' She ignored that and made a big deal about it to my mom and my mom was gracious but told her to please stop and that she did not want to hear more, that she had been much happier NOT thinking about those things.

My ex wife could not understand it and SHE CONTINUED her 'Colombo' quest. She had exhausted her own family and just could not let it go.

It is great that it had a good outcome for you... but, I tend to be careful about telling people about their background etc. You just never know and people WILL tell you if they want to know that information.
 

Telekarster

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Good for you TD! Your daughter did quite well IMO. When my Father died, many years ago now, he had the family tree in his documents that no one knew about. I grabbed it and tucked it away. Years would pass and then all of a sudden I found it in my crap! LOL!! Forgot all about it. I decided to check into it and see just how accurate it was vs. the family folklore that always existed. Bottom line - The folklore turned out to be a bunch of fossilized poopoo, and I could back it all up with documentation LOL!!! When I had the great "unveiling" of what I'd found, a journey that took me over 5 years, you wouldn't believe the resistance I got. People would say "But but but, Grandma Ninny told me back in 1950 that XYZ is where we come from, and we were related to the great Grand High Poobah of Asia Minor!" I'd say "Welp.... sorry... Grandma Ninny was wrong, we didn't even come from that part of the world, and here's the evidence. Prove me wrong ;)" In essence, I set the record strait in the family and now people come to me if they have questions about all that :cool: However what I did find out was a lot of stuff that was more realistic and far more interesting, IMO, than being a descendant of the great Grand High Poobah of Asia Minor ;)
 

schmee

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Interesting story @Toto'sDad . It does bring some peace to know things.
I have been on an Ancestry kick for 5 years or so now. It's been VERY interesting for sure. Amazing the things you can find out. It's also been a bit.... disconcerting .....and puts me in a bit of a sad head space at times.
In the process, I found two journals from family's trip west by wagon train in the mid 1800's. As well as how many children died young years ago. Of two brother's families, 3 died on the trip.

Here's an edited excerpt:
In 1852, (they) decided to move west and sold their land; bought two wagons, six yoke of oxen, two cows and provisions for the journey. A first hand account of this trip across the country in 1852 via the Oregon Trail is as follows:

"My wife favored the plan, we were in good health; and with high hopes we started on that tiresome journey for the far west on the 7th of April, 1852. My brother had preceded us, and we overtook him, with his family, about sixty miles on the road in Wapolo County, Iowa. Fearing a scarcity of feed, we bought corn for our cattle.

We got to Council Bluffs on the Missouri River all right, the company had now increased to twenty-six wagons, cattle, horses, men, women and children. We commenced the river crossing, but it took four days to land all on the other side.

Our route lay on the north side of the Platte River, through a level country entirely unsettled, mostly without timber, and sometimes making it difficult to get a few sticks with which to build a fire at night. After crossing the River we began to see Indians. They did not bother us much, but often-appeared in camp to beg food, or to find what we had left on the ground. We saw no buffalo or animals larger than coyotes or prairie dogs.
We corralled our cattle at night. One night we encountered a severe storm of rain and wind which blew down our tents and stampeded our cattle, which took nearly all the next day to find. My oldest son found them about three miles away from camp. We found the dust very uncomfortable in so long a train. Often we could hardly see the team we were driving, and it shut out all distant view. Gradually the country became more rugged, and we began to ascend hills.

On the Fourth of July we camped on the summit of the Rocky Mountains, starting at night to descend toward Green River. When we reached the River we found a ferry kept by the white men. We paid them eight dollars to take us across the stream. Soon after this, My brother's team failed, so he had to leave his heavy wagon and take one of mine that was lighter. We took his things and family into one of my wagons.

Reaching the Snake River, we found someone with rope stretched across the river and a wagon-box for a ferry. We asked him if we could join his company. We brought up our teams and the next day we all got across safely.

Putting our wagons together again, we pursued our way as usual, until four o'clock in the afternoon, when my little son, five years old, was taken violently sick with cholera. No medicine seemed to do him any good, and he died. The next morning we put him in a chest, it not being long enough we had to knock out one end which left his feet sticking out. It was sad, indeed, to lay him down for his last sleep in this wild place, but we had no alternative - the Indians gave us no chance to stop - we must push onto keep out of their way. There were several persons buried there that day. The others became sick, my brother Timothy, and his little daughter, aged two years. We did all we could for them, but after a few days of suffering they died on the 8th day of August, as well as many others.

There was neither comfort by day nor rest by night. My second and third boys, were very unwell, and it was not wonderful that my dear wife, worn and fatigued with the long journey and sorrow, should be the next victim. The situation seemed very hard; everybody was frightened at the cholera and the Indians.

That was a dreary and hopeless night as I watched my dear wife, the companion of my early years, battling disease and yielding up that hope that had sustained her through many trials. She lingered until noon the next day, when she breathed her last. We were left almost alone to perform the sad rites of burial. Most of the company had hastened on. Mr. Fisk and August Lewis were, with their wives, kind enough to stop with us until it was over. We buried
her on a little mound beneath a tree, and smoothed it down as well as we could, lest the Indians might disturb the grave."
 

Toto'sDad

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Good for you TD! Your daughter did quite well IMO. When my Father died, many years ago now, he had the family tree in his documents that no one knew about. I grabbed it and tucked it away. Years would pass and then all of a sudden I found it in my crap! LOL!! Forgot all about it. I decided to check into it and see just how accurate it was vs. the family folklore that always existed. Bottom line - The folklore turned out to be a bunch of fossilized poopoo, and I could back it all up with documentation LOL!!! When I had the great "unveiling" of what I'd found, a journey that took me over 5 years, you wouldn't believe the resistance I got. People would say "But but but, Grandma Ninny told me back in 1950 that XYZ is where we come from, and we were related to the great Grand High Poobah of Asia Minor!" I'd say "Welp.... sorry... Grandma Ninny was wrong, we didn't even come from that part of the world, and here's the evidence. Prove me wrong ;)" In essence, I set the record strait in the family and now people come to me if they have questions about all that :cool: However what I did find out was a lot of stuff that was more realistic and far more interesting, IMO, than being a descendant of the great Grand High Poobah of Asia Minor ;)
So far we haven't turned up any Poobahs grand or otherwise. I would like to contact someone who actually knew him, alas I fear it is far too late for that.
 
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Telekarster

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Interesting story @Toto'sDad . It does bring some peace to know things.
I have been on an Ancestry kick for 5 years or so now. It's been VERY interesting for sure. Amazing the things you can find out. It's also been a bit.... disconcerting .....and puts me in a bit of a sad head space at times.
In the process, I found two journals from family's trip west by wagon train in the mid 1800's. As well as how many children died young years ago. Of two brother's families, 3 died on the trip.

Here's an edited excerpt:
In 1852, (they) decided to move west and sold their land; bought two wagons, six yoke of oxen, two cows and provisions for the journey. A first hand account of this trip across the country in 1852 via the Oregon Trail is as follows:

"My wife favored the plan, we were in good health; and with high hopes we started on that tiresome journey for the far west on the 7th of April, 1852. My brother had preceded us, and we overtook him, with his family, about sixty miles on the road in Wapolo County, Iowa. Fearing a scarcity of feed, we bought corn for our cattle.

We got to Council Bluffs on the Missouri River all right, the company had now increased to twenty-six wagons, cattle, horses, men, women and children. We commenced the river crossing, but it took four days to land all on the other side.


Our route lay on the north side of the Platte River, through a level country entirely unsettled, mostly without timber, and sometimes making it difficult to get a few sticks with which to build a fire at night. After crossing the River we began to see Indians. They did not bother us much, but often-appeared in camp to beg food, or to find what we had left on the ground. We saw no buffalo or animals larger than coyotes or prairie dogs.
We corralled our cattle at night. One night we encountered a severe storm of rain and wind which blew down our tents and stampeded our cattle, which took nearly all the next day to find. My oldest son found them about three miles away from camp. We found the dust very uncomfortable in so long a train. Often we could hardly see the team we were driving, and it shut out all distant view. Gradually the country became more rugged, and we began to ascend hills.

On the Fourth of July we camped on the summit of the Rocky Mountains, starting at night to descend toward Green River. When we reached the River we found a ferry kept by the white men. We paid them eight dollars to take us across the stream. Soon after this, My brother's team failed, so he had to leave his heavy wagon and take one of mine that was lighter. We took his things and family into one of my wagons.

Reaching the Snake River, we found someone with rope stretched across the river and a wagon-box for a ferry. We asked him if we could join his company. We brought up our teams and the next day we all got across safely.

Putting our wagons together again, we pursued our way as usual, until four o'clock in the afternoon, when my little son, five years old, was taken violently sick with cholera. No medicine seemed to do him any good, and he died. The next morning we put him in a chest, it not being long enough we had to knock out one end which left his feet sticking out. It was sad, indeed, to lay him down for his last sleep in this wild place, but we had no alternative - the Indians gave us no chance to stop - we must push onto keep out of their way. There were several persons buried there that day. The others became sick, my brother Timothy, and his little daughter, aged two years. We did all we could for them, but after a few days of suffering they died on the 8th day of August, as well as many others.

There was neither comfort by day nor rest by night. My second and third boys, were very unwell, and it was not wonderful that my dear wife, worn and fatigued with the long journey and sorrow, should be the next victim. The situation seemed very hard; everybody was frightened at the cholera and the Indians.

That was a dreary and hopeless night as I watched my dear wife, the companion of my early years, battling disease and yielding up that hope that had sustained her through many trials. She lingered until noon the next day, when she breathed her last. We were left almost alone to perform the sad rites of burial. Most of the company had hastened on. Mr. Fisk and August Lewis were, with their wives, kind enough to stop with us until it was over. We buried
her on a little mound beneath a tree, and smoothed it down as well as we could, lest the Indians might disturb the grave."

Yeah man.... I've uncovered similar stories in my journey too. Likewise it took me over 5 years to gather everything up and collate it all, and put it in a way that made sense to people. The stuff I found out gave me a much greater appreciation for those who lived back then, even 100 years ago. Tough people. It's hard to imagine some of the things my family had to go through, endure, way back then. It seemed death was just around every corner, young and old, 24/7.
 

Telekarster

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So far we haven't turned up any Poobahs grand or otherwise. I would like to contact someone who actually knew him, alas I fear it is far too late for that.

You just never know TD. Through my research I found a long lost cousin, literally over 50 years had passed since she had conversed with anyone from my family! I didn't even know who she was in fact. Guess what... she was a pro genealogist and had practiced her art for over 40 years! That's how I found her i.e. our research crossed paths. I looked her up cause I was thinking "Who is this person? They have the same info I've got! I have to find out who they are and try to contact em if I can" So I looked her up and within 10 minutes of a phone call "Oh! I get it now Telekarster! You're so and so's son! Ha! Guess what? We're cousins!"

Oh man.... it was amazing and to this day we talk from time to time, especially when she or I come up with something new. I got her in contact with people in my fam she'd not had any convo's with in over 50 years. People didn't know whatever happened to her! :eek: It was really an amazing turn of events and man did it open up the floodgates for me in terms of data, cause she shared with me all the info she had obtained over the years as well; it really cleared up some questions for me and filled in some gaps.

So... again you just never know what you'll find, but it's quite possible someone is still out there who could give you some details about your Dad. Ya'll just have to keep diggin' and pay close attn. to details, cause they can lead to other veins of gold... just like what happened with me ;)
 

schmee

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Yeah man.... I've uncovered similar stories in my journey too. Likewise it took me over 5 years to gather everything up and collate it all, and put it in a way that made sense to people. The stuff I found out gave me a much greater appreciation for those who lived back then, even 100 years ago. Tough people. It's hard to imagine some of the things my family had to go through, endure, way back then. It seemed death was just around every corner, young and old, 24/7.
Yeah, My Great Grandmother had siblings that only lived to be:
1 day (her twin sister)
3 years
6 years
16 years
20 years
25 years
 

stxrus

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Mom got into it very seriously in the late ‘70s until the early ‘90s. She even went 2-3 times to Salt Lake City to a huge database of genealogy. Mom was able to go back on both sides of her family to the, I believe, mid-1700s.
My niece got involved and they would spend time talking to each other long distance to compare their findings
 

Toto'sDad

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Mom got into it very seriously in the late ‘70s until the early ‘90s. She even went 2-3 times to Salt Lake City to a huge database of genealogy. Mom was able to go back on both sides of her family to the, I believe, mid-1700s.
My niece got involved and they would spend time talking to each other long distance to compare their findings
My daughter showed me how to pursue the search, I don't know that I want to though. It's enough for me that someone somewhere took a liking to my dad enough so that he had an obituary, and funeral. Also, he was sick from having a heart attack for a short while before he succumbed and was in a care facility for that time. He had way better of it at the end than I would have guessed. Maybe in his later years he settled down, might even have had a woman in his life, that would be an easy conclusion to draw from the obits, and funeral, being in a rest home etc.
 

Mike Eskimo

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Cool that your daughter did that for you TD and it was seemingly just enough information.


My worthless dad always had the most interesting things. Actually, that was one of the most annoying things about him. Because you’d have to ask him “hey what’s that ? “ because you actually were curious though what you really wanted to do was punch him square in the face.

Anyway, I noticed in the crazy western historical room of his house, he had a framed immigration/naturalization form for some guy with my actual name, that is not a common name. It was from 1851.

But it was a fairly common name in Ireland when all the spud-kickers came over in the 1850s through early 1920s.

And so I asked him, “hey old man is that a relative of us, like a direct relative? “

He made some fairly racist quip comparing the shanty Irish with another group and finished it up with a beautiful “ah - all us mongrels are related aren’t we ?”

Yeah, whatever dude…🙄😩👊🏽
 

Telekarster

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“ah - all us mongrels are related aren’t we ?”

What's interesting is that now that we've mapped the human genome and all the DNA stuff we know now, he's pretty much been proven right? :eek: Still, if you ever wondered about your lineage it's pretty easy to get started these days. It's a heck of a journey once you get into it.
 

Toto'sDad

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What's interesting is that now that we've mapped the human genome and all the DNA stuff we know now, he's pretty much been proven right? :eek: Still, if you ever wondered about your lineage it's pretty easy to get started these days. It's a heck of a journey once you get into it.
I suspect if my dad and I were somehow through a quirk in time, perhaps by our time travel vehicle, seen standing together and a photo of us were taken we would probably pretty much be a pair of matching.

1661801191343.png

All dressed up with nowhere to go.
 

Toto'sDad

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My brother-in-law likes to crow (given the slightest opportunity) about how his great, great, great or some such uncle was a colonel during the civil war. So far, the highest-ranking soldier I could find in our bunch was a corporal in the Mississippi 2nd Calvary. Oh well, some things never change. ;)
 

Toto'sDad

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@Toto'sDad so happy that you have resolved your childhood and found out about your dad. I did some research on my father's ancestors and mune
It surprising to me, how much relief I felt at knowing the final destiny of my father. He had remained a shadowy image in my life for all these years. My final encounter with him was when I was ten years old in 1953. I'm glad to know that someone in the end cared enough about him to look after him, see to his funeral, and see him buried. It was good to see myself mentioned as his son. I'm truly sorry at this point that our paths never crossed again.
 

Fretting out

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This reminds me

The other week I met my long lost uncle for the first time in 20 some years…

There’s no bitterness he just left family type stuff to go do his own thing

Point is he did research a long time ago about our family history back when it took a lot of work and more than a computer

Anyway I’d like to reconnect a little at least enough to get the lowdown on our family origins
 
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