My Costco Adventure

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of


Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder


Dog and was in the checkout line when woman behind me


asked if I had a dog.



What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm


retired and have little to do,:idea: on impulse I told her that


no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet


again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I


ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50


pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with


tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in


both arms.


I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that


the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with


Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel


hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well


and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here


that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my


story.)



Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care


because the dog food poisoned me.. I told her no, I stepped


off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit


us both.



I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart


attack he was laughing so hard.



Costco won't let me shop there


anymore.