Listen closely to what your friends have to say, you might be missing something.

[Toto'sDad]

A while back, I wrote about a former client and old friend stopping in his company truck and talking to the wife and I while we were out walking our little dog. He had his charming old father with him, whom I have also known for probably twenty-five years. Everything was fine.

Not long after that, my friend called and said we needed to get together and have lunch. I said sounds good, he sounded slightly different, but it kind of failed to register at the time. He said he'd get in touch with me to set something up, but that he was presently training someone. I should have picked up on that for sure, but I didn't.

Yesterday, a former fellow employee texted me and let me know my friend had passed away. I don't know why, but I always have the same reaction, I thought this has got to be a mistake. I called around, then thought to call my friend's number, his answering service said that he'd be out of the office for a few weeks, and gave a number and name to call, which I did. The fellow who answered informed me that my friend had passed the day before.

As Johnny Cash said in song, it all comes undone. The fellow who passed not long after my son passed, invited me to lunch with his wife. They were dead serious, they made me an honorary member of their family that day. Though we had several get-togethers after that I am so ashamed that I never got to see my friend again before he passed. Time speeds by, we get wrapped up in our own lives, and soon, it all comes undone.

 

[posttoastie]

"Sooner or later, it all gets real"

 

[Mjark]

My dad told me what funeral director he wanted me to use just this week.

 

[Paca G51]

Last year a best friend buddy and I were planning to drive up to Oregon and visit my cousin . I called him and told him of our plans and said we would be heading his way next Friday. Cousin said that’s great , can’t wait to see us ! The following Wednesday his wife called and said no need to come at this time. Cousin had a stroke and died the previous day! Man-O-Man , I wished we had traveled sooner

 

[Kandinskyesque]

My closest friend died in 2016, he knew it was coming, so did I but I tried to pretend it wasn't.
He had lived in Vancouver since 2001 and came back home to Scotland in August 2015 to see family.
I'll always be grateful of the day we spent in my garden back then, just sitting talking, playing guitars and playing records from our teenage years.
We didn't talk about the present, other than the music we were listening to, nor the future, just the journey through life, almost as if we were certain we'd be doing the same thing tomorrow like we did as teens.

"Thanks for making today so effin' normal." he told me on leaving.
"See you soon" I replied as usual.
"Hopefully not but it's been great." he said.

We spoke via Skype a few times after up until he could talk any longer by January 2016, but that face to face one was special.

When my old sponsor from 2010-17 died a few weeks ago (funeral this Thursday), we had spoke for a couple of hours on the phone 48 hours before. We'd even arranged for him to visit me during the week ahead.
Now that the initial shock has sunk in, I'm sort of glad our last conversation was "so effin normal" as my teenage buddy would say.

 

[dougstrum]

You never know. We went hiking with friends on New Years day and just a week later he died of a massive heart attack

 

[BluesMann]

It is really hard to process when someone you know, especially in your own neighborhood is here today and literally gone that evening. Most of the time, none of us see it’s coming whether it’s to ourselves, loved ones or friends. My mother in law is heading for 95 this year. She is a real gem. We get along famously, and yet my wife and I are bracing for that day. She’s 18 hours away by plane in the Rio Grande Valley, near the southern border at Brownsville, TX. We try to get down there as often as possible. And even though we know it WILL come one day, it just doesn’t seem possible. Things the mind just can’t grasp I guess.

 

[Fendereedo]

Sorry for your loses, all of you. My dad was sitting eating his breakfast with my mother when he passed. She said she saw the light go out of his eyes, and the colour in his face go - a year later she was gone too.

 

[gitold]

Sorry for your loss.

 

[eclecticsynergy]

Most of us never know when our time will come.
And those who do often won't want to talk about it.

"Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment, until it becomes a memory"
- Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss)

Keep in touch with the people in your life, especially those you care deeply about.
You can't ever tell when it'll be the last time.

One thing about growing old - the list of people we've lost starts getting longer rapidly.

 

[Toto'sDad]

It is really hard to process when someone you know, especially in your own neighborhood is here today and literally gone that evening. Most of the time, none of us see it’s coming whether it’s to ourselves, loved ones or friends. My mother in law is heading for 95 this year. She is a real gem. We get along famously, and yet my wife and I are bracing for that day. She’s 18 hours away by plane in the Rio Grande Valley, near the southern border at Brownsville, TX. We try to get down there as often as possible. And even though we know it WILL come one day, it just doesn’t seem possible. Things the mind just can’t grasp I guess.

Most people I think have at least a while to contemplate death before being faced with it. I was eight years old the first time I witnessed someone dying. I gave a former boss mouth to mouth, along with two other guys we kept him going for twenty-two minutes after he suffered a heart attack for the ambulance to arrive but died just as he got to the hospital. I was with my mother, when she passed from this world. My oldest son left us nine years ago.

My time out on the highway in diesel trucks I saw so much carnage, I wake up some nights thinking about it. I once saw two guys sitting up in the seat of their car, they got hit head on by a larger car, both were gone. We brush by death every day, totally unawares.

 

[ellendawn]

Having listened to Fairport from the start, it was twenty years after her passing when I discovered Sandy Denny's tragic end.
"One More Chance"

 

[GGardner]

We all need to eat healthier, drink less whiskey, and get back to cardio. Well, I do, at least. Sorry about your loss.

P.S. I write this after consuming my day's allotment of tacos and bourbon.

 

[Mike Eskimo]

Tacos and bourbon,
That’s all we got
Some make it til next week
Some die on the spot
If I see you, I might wave hello
Tacos and bourbon, not a bad way to go

 

[GGardner]

@Mike Eskimo

Bourbon and tacos
It's real easy to do
We're drinking not thinking
Then crash when we're thru
If I dream of us, I could wave hello
Tacos and bourbon, not a bad way to go

 

[String Tree]

A while back, I wrote about a former client and old friend stopping in his company truck and talking to the wife and I while we were out walking our little dog. He had his charming old father with him, whom I have also known for probably twenty-five years. Everything was fine.

Not long after that, my friend called and said we needed to get together and have lunch. I said sounds good, he sounded slightly different, but it kind of failed to register at the time. He said he'd get in touch with me to set something up, but that he was presently training someone. I should have picked up on that for sure, but I didn't.

Yesterday, a former fellow employee texted me and let me know my friend had passed away. I don't know why, but I always have the same reaction, I thought this has got to be a mistake. I called around, then thought to call my friend's number, his answering service said that he'd be out of the office for a few weeks, and gave a number and name to call, which I did. The fellow who answered informed me that my friend had passed the day before.

As Johnny Cash said in song, it all comes undone. The fellow who passed not long after my son passed, invited me to lunch with his wife. They were dead serious, they made me an honorary member of their family that day. Though we had several get-togethers after that I am so ashamed that I never got to see my friend again before he passed. Time speeds by, we get wrapped up in our own lives, and soon, it all comes undone.

You are absolutely right.
I have been around long enough to see it a few times as well.

I'll not share those times as I don't want to look like I am trying to Quantify how much better or, worse my experiences have been.

Suffice it to say. those times were Devastating for me and, Mrs String Tree.

Our Hearts go out to those who have had to endure the same.

-ST

 

[Chester P Squier]

One thing about growing old - the list of people we've lost starts getting longer rapidly.

It's that rapid part that gets me.

 

[andy__d]

Thank you. I got a really weird text from an old friend today, and had decided to ignore it. This thread changed mind.

 

[Flat6Driver]

My dad told me what funeral director he wanted me to use just this week.

I had dinner with my dad and mom and wife of a year. He made some passing mention of re-fi'ing the house "so mom would never have to worry about it" (he handled all the money). OK, whatever. It didn't register as important or anything. A few weeks later, he had a heart attack, was in the hospital a week in a coma and died. In the middle of planning for the funeral, I get a call from a lawyer to handle the closing. (I don't recall why he called me). After pausing for a moment, I recalled the re-fi conversation. In no way do I think my dad had a notion he was near the end, I think it was all subconscious/subliminal or something.

 

[Mjark]

I had dinner with my dad and mom and wife of a year. He made some passing mention of re-fi'ing the house "so mom would never have to worry about it" (he handled all the money). OK, whatever. It didn't register as important or anything. A few weeks later, he had a heart attack, was in the hospital a week in a coma and died. In the middle of planning for the funeral, I get a call from a lawyer to handle the closing. (I don't recall why he called me). After pausing for a moment, I recalled the re-fi conversation. In no way do I think my dad had a notion he was near the end, I think it was all subconscious/subliminal or something.

My dad is 93 with some significant health issues. He still lives independently but he's on the edge.