Japanese toilets
- Thread starter 4pickupguy
- Start date
Band name?
You go first.
You go first.
I realise my butt is still living in the Dark Ages
Some things are best left dark
This is the control panel for my wife’s fancy toilet.
The simple one lever model was good enough for me
The simple one lever model was good enough for me
Got sent to Japan again on a moments notice. I am accustom to traveling but this last little rent house (provided by customer) has a toilet that has more computing power than a modern airliner. There are features and buttons that simply don’t belong on a toilet. Most buttons seem to want to deploy something to violate you in some way, but only one will flush the damn thing. Had to use my phone with the translator app to figure it out. List of features built into the two arm rest on this toilet that don’t belong:
1. Heated seat.
2. Bluetooth speakers (ok that ones pretty good).
3. All manner of little squirty things (one of which should be labeled “High Pressure Episiotomy” as it is derived apparently from a high pressure industrial water saw used to cut various ceramics, marble, and plate steels)
4. A poorly labeled “stop” button it takes 5 agonizing minutes to find that disengages feature number 3.
5. A button that translates “Self clean mode” but given feature 3, I am afraid to push.
6. Seat massage. (seriously)
7. All manner of “eco” symbols presumably to control water usage, power consumption (probably a turbine to turn flushes into electricity to power the heated seat, speculating)
There is a phone number to the “help desk” on the L/H arm and a QR code. I wouldn’t be surprised if there is an app. The phone number is probably to get an IT guy to remote into the the toilets mainframe server for updates etc.
Captain Kirk would be proud to own this thing. That is all.
4pickupguy
Doctor of Teleocity
Sorry, for me that would just sound like a flock of small birds struggling to push car with four flats down a muddy road….…………… poor birds
.……I mean, …m y,…. g o d..
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Knows3Chords
Friend of Leo's
.
This thread needs some J-Pop
Bidets were the BEST thing about our visit to Japan. I loved 'em so much that I installed one when I got home. Admittedly, it's just fits under the seat and connects to the water line, not fancy like most. In the summer, it feels great: nice and warm water on my "area." In the winter, it's...ummmm...brisk, to say the least. When we sell this house and move into another, I will have a pro install a "real" bidet: the whole toilet bidet. I can NOT wait for that day.
And FWIW, the squatters things are more of a China kind of thing, not really Japan.
And FWIW, the squatters things are more of a China kind of thing, not really Japan.
Why is the seat stained? I believe that color is “c diff chocolate”How bout Toto? Already taken?
Yeah, I would have gone with "ember red". It's supposed to show it's toasty warm on a cold winter's morn
bettyseldest
Friend of Leo's
My neighbour in France bought one about eight years ago. Every visitor to the house was taken to the cloakroom to view it, but he would not let anyone else use it, not even his wife. A couple of years later when she moved him into a nursing home, we were invited round to try it, and I can report that it is very efficient, and not at all unpleasant.
4pickupguy
Doctor of Teleocity
The only thing wrong with this approach is. If I’m using my phone to pilot the toilet, what phone am I going to use for TDPRI?
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Hey everybody, Pops is in the home now. We can all use the blinged out ****ter.
