I'm really screwed up with stress and depression.

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by Doctorx33, Jun 21, 2019.

  1. Doctorx33

    Doctorx33 Tele-Afflicted

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    I'm in great despair. My sisters recent death, and I found out this week that an old friend in my home town has passed. I also have some serious problems in my life that I can't talk about that are overwhelming.

    I don't sleep, not eating worth a damn, my blood pressure is up and I'm drinking every day. My stress and depression are beyond description. I pray for serenity but I've been feeling I have been abandoned by God. I do have very good friends that stand by me, maybe that is His way of helping. I don't know because I'm not thinking clearly.

    I don't know why I'm posting this, I guess because you guys are an empathetic group.
     
  2. Flyboy

    Flyboy Tele-Meister

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    First off, you HAVE to look after yourself! Booze will only make the depression worse. Do you have any nearby friends or family you can confide in? You must speak to your doctor, too.

    Stress will do you in as well. What's causing that?
     
  3. viking

    viking Friend of Leo's

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    Seek help
    Professional , or private help.
    Talk about your situation with someone not involved in what is bothering you
     
  4. telleutelleme

    telleutelleme Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

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    Reach out to your friends. My wife always say "This too will pass" and for 46 years she has been right. Life is full of challenges and sometimes they stack up. Press on and know that the community that is TDPRI understands and cares. Prayers and good thoughts are heading your way.
     
  5. Guitarzan

    Guitarzan Poster Extraordinaire

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    The only advice I can offer is: to start exercising vigorously in the morning and the evening. It has a number of benefits including endorphin release, a sense of purpose and accomplishment, and it will make you tired enough to want to eat and sleep again.

    Lay off of alcohol, substances, and sleeping pills.

    Make a list of things that you need to get done each day, push through and get them done, and check them off. It will be the path back to normal daily functioning.

    You may also go see a professional grief counselor, there are people with training that can help that are not exactly psychologists or psychiatrists if you have an aversion to using them. I know such counselors in the Atlanta area and will provide a referral if you wish.
     
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2019
  6. boredguy6060

    boredguy6060 Friend of Leo's

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    Well there are some topics that you have mentioned that are off limits, but my advise,
    Find someone local that you can talk to.
    Grief itself warrants some counseling. Most of the subjects you touched on could be dealt with in that setting.
    Just remember, these negative feelings will pass, the pain will improve, you just have to give yourself more time.
    Good luck,
     
  7. blowtorch

    blowtorch Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I'm really sorry to hear about this. It sounds like you've been struggling quite a bit, and that can be discouraging, and beyond discouraging, really.

    Drinking is a choice. You don't have to drink, and hopefully you are aware that alcohol is a depressant.
    Sleep is very important. In order to get enough sleep, it helps to cut out drinking, lower caffeine intake, and get exercise

    Studies have shown that being outdoors 2 hours every week helps lessen stress and depression. It has to be a minimunm of two hrs every week though, for you to get benefit from it. SO, maybe think about combining exercise and being outside, two birds with one stone. Start out with baby steps.

    Best of luck to you, hang in there. And remember, although you stated you feel abandoned, you are in fact a precious child of God, and He does not abandon His children.
     
  8. stephent2

    stephent2 Poster Extraordinaire

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    It's a good start to talk about it.
    • Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA): 1-800-662-HELP
     
  9. Fiesta Red

    Fiesta Red Friend of Leo's

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    First of all, my sympathies to you for your loss and for the situation you are dealing with...my heart goes out to you.

    Secondly, it’s understandable that you feel abandoned; but (trying not to break religious prohibitions here) know that you are loved. Speak to Him about your feelings and I bet you’ll get an answer really quickly (if you’re watching out for it).

    I would not give you any medical advice, but going to see a medical doctor might be a good idea. Even if you don’t like taking medication, there are things to help us through rough patches in life.

    I also wouldn’t give psychiatric or psychological advice, but a support group might be helpful.

    I hope you get some comfort soon.
     
  10. P Thought

    P Thought Poster Extraordinaire Silver Supporter

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    It's good that you have friends (besides us on TDPRI) around. I hope that you'll seek help from medical or pastoral professionals, too. Depression is no bueno, and when it's severe it is dangerous.

    All my best.
     
  11. blueruins

    blueruins TDPRI Member

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    Very very sorry brother. God will never abandon you....never.
    You are greatly loved and irreplaceable no matter how you are feeling.
    There is a season for everything and I’m very sorry to hear you are in a season of misery and loss.
    It may seem bleak but think on the beautiful and good things and try to be a help to someone even less fortunate than yourself.
    We can all do something no matter how small to make someone else’s life a little brighter.
    There are good days ahead brother and you are greatly loved!
     
  12. BigDaddyLH

    BigDaddyLH Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

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    As a guy who goes through bouts of depression -- sometimes for no external reason, durn! -- I gotta +1 on not relying on booze. I've tried it and it makes it worse. Then for good measure I tried it the next couple times, too, with the same results. Just to be sure :confused:

    I'm an atheist, so I can't comment on stuff I couldn't comment on in any case, but I have seen a therapist and that helped. Took medication, too, and I'm not sure if it made a difference, but YMMV. The dog helps, too.

    Good luck!
     
  13. uriah1

    uriah1 Telefied Ad Free Member

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    You recognize you have an issue.
    That is cool.
    Try to see someone who sees this everyday,
    an analyst, rabbi or minister or something.
    Especially if it is a clinical type of depression..
    Ya, sometimes it does all suck..for all of us.
     
  14. blowtorch

    blowtorch Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Back when my ex was cool, we had a discussion where we agreed that if we were shrinks, we'd simply tell people to quit drinking/drugging, eat more healthfully, and get more exercise.

    While it's not quite as simple and clear cut as that in all cases, these are all things well within every person's control.
     
  15. gtroates

    gtroates Tele-Meister

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    Don’t put off talking to a doctor about getting help. Depression is a disorder that can make you think only negatively and not be able to see the other side of any situation. Treat it like a disease that you need to get help for, if left untreated it consumes your thoughts until you can’t see the bright side of anything in life. Psychiatric care works with mental coping techniques and at some points medication to change the downward spiraling depression traps people fall into. Good luck, and for your own sake don’t drink or take other depressant drugs to numb your feelings, they only add to the depression.
     
  16. stephent2

    stephent2 Poster Extraordinaire

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    depression isn't cured by a brisk walk in the sunshine and a good diet. It takes work, sometimes medication. all that can certainly help after you've gotten a handle on your depression.

    frankly, those suggestions just make depression worse, the depressed person asking "why can't i fix this myself, what's wrong with me",..

    You can't pull yourself up by your bootstraps when you can't find the bootstraps. Call for help, make an appointment w/ a dr or therapist.
     
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2019
    Larry F, demon, Doctorx33 and 8 others like this.
  17. GGardner

    GGardner Tele-Afflicted

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    I'm not a healthcare professional--or even close. But I lost a childhood friend to depression and it haunts me to this day. Laying off the booze, focusing on physical exercise, speaking with friends, and seeking professional help all sound like GREAT suggestions to me. Medication and/or behavioral therapy reportedly works wonders. My buddy did none of those things.

    Although we would never expect someone with diabetes or cancer to simply will themselves to better health, we sometimes think that people with depression--our co-workers, family members, or bandmates--should just "snap out of it," and that their inability to do so reveals a character flaw. Of course, that line of thinking is completely misguided. It is a mistake that I made once that I will never make again. I hope you get better.
     
    Last edited: Jun 21, 2019
  18. TheGoodTexan

    TheGoodTexan Moderator Staff Member Ad Free Member

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    Right now, as you read this, please... PLEASE... pick up your phone and call your closest confidant... and let go of any pride that you may have and say, "I need help, and I don't know how to get it. Can you please help me?"

    Sometimes it is overwhelming to call a hotline, a therapist, a counselor, a doctor...etc. You don't know how, or who to trust.

    But if you ask a friend to make the call for you, and set it up for you... it is sometimes easier.

    Hang in there buddy. I have helped many people through serious darknesses. Please reach out to a trusted friend and ask them to help you.
     
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  19. Stubee

    Stubee Poster Extraordinaire Gold Supporter

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    I get ‘situationally depressed’ due to difficult and sad family stuff, and it does help me to get out, exercise, get things done and to especially get with friends. Hell, talking to strangers can perk me up. It usually clears but read on...

    I agree with stephen2 and others: call your doctor and tell the office what’s going on. I’ve discussed my situation with my doc and she counsels me to call immediately if the depression doesn’t lift. I know that when you’re in a bad state and really feeling hopeless that it seems nobody cares or can help, and you want to contact a doctor before you get to that point. My doc has prescribed short duration antidepressants a couple of times, and they can help, but if you don’t have a doctor you can call a counselor ‘agency’ like a community mental health hotline, or even walk into an urgent care and tell them what’s going on.

    I’m sorry for what you’re going through. Reach out because this type of thing is tough to handle alone.
     
  20. elihu

    elihu Poster Extraordinaire

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