You need to play one. They are a great experience. But play it for more than a few minutes. More like a few days.
I won't go bit by bit through your list, but, for example, the headstock dive is specific to some models. Earlier versions with thinner necks and vintage tuners don't have it. OTOH, later baseball bat necks and full size Grovers - yeah there are considerations. Use a strap with a rougher interior (unfinished leather) and don't wear a silk shirt at the gig.
Another reason they dive is that they are so darn light in the body. The neck isn't heavy - the body is light. If you're willing to have it weigh a little more (like most guitars), you can just add some weight in the body cavity.
As for the neck location, it's the same as any Gibson and roughly the same as Fenders, scale length not withstanding. The difference is the location of the lower bout relative to the neck. Sitting, it feels left displaced. At least when you first play one. The feeling vanishes after you have a few hours with them. Stand up and it's like any other guitar.
I've had my Epi SG since 2020...
( I'm mainly a Fender player that just wanted 1 'representative Gibson style' guitar - and finally picked an SG for light body/comfort)
... I play sitting down, and have become used to the 'shift' with neck-body join; you play it enough, you adjust.
I love it- no neck dive ( light vintage tuners), all the controls are IMO, in a great place to navigate sitting down, and Epi pickups have come a long way (I know, from previous)- balanced and clear, clean or dirty. Fun guitar for everything.
And I love that Classic '60's Cherry mahogany look.