If you don’t have anything nice to say

Si G X

Friend of Leo's
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Interesting; some of the most trollish characters online (I am NOT referring to you) self-espouse those exact same traits, even using them as justification for their various critiques.

That is interesting. It should go without saying that if you honestly do believe in those things then they should equally apply to others. If you can't accept others personal choices then you don't deserve them yourself.

Individualism, to me, about taking responsibility for yourself and your actions. It's NOT about doing whatever the hell you like to the detriment of others.

Liberty is something that's often taken to granted in the countries we live in but I think most people understand why it's important.... especially at the moment.

I don't really understand what that has to do with trying to get a rise out of people online. People like that seem to lack any of these principles to me.

People self-espouse many things that their behavior would clearly give away as being untrue, it's unfortunately a very common human trait.


I hope I haven't crossed any forum lines here, apologies in advance if I have.
 

OmegaWoods

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Haters gonna hate.

Ignore button is your friend. Please don't leave. For every a55ho1e here, there are a hundred who are really great.
 

telepraise

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Coming from the older generation, I agree all the sentiments expressed here except "grow a thicker skin". The "ignore" feature can make your forum experience much more pleasant. I've only had to use it a few times and not in quite awhile. Ah, if only the real world had an ignore button.

This is really great place and I enjoy coming here. Of greater concern to me is the world at large, our country particularly. Unfortunately, largely due to a few very prominent public figures, it has recently become acceptable to be rude, belligerent, insulting, and even violent with someone without provocation just because they are different. The concepts of civility and courtesy are lost on a growing portion of our population. Thankfully, not here.
 

Si G X

Friend of Leo's
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England
This is really great place and I enjoy coming here. Of greater concern to me is the world at large, our country particularly. Unfortunately, largely due to a few very prominent public figures, it has recently become acceptable to be rude, belligerent, insulting, and even violent with someone without provocation just because they are different. The concepts of civility and courtesy are lost on a growing portion of our population. Thankfully, not here.

It's changed that's for sure, the other day we'd just been food shopping at the supermarket and we loaded up the car and got in and just over the way there was an old lady who was clearly struggling to get her shopping into her car and hang on to the trolly .. um, 'Grocery cart' I think you call them (the car park is on a bit of a slope) anyway I get out of the car and go over to ask if she needs some help and would she like me to hold the trolly for her while she puts her stuff away. She was very thankful and told me she was struggling because she was 'waiting for a new knee', she must have been at least in her 80's. anyway to cut a long story short... I don't say this to big myself up, it was nothing, but it was Saturday, it was busy and you don't need me to tell you how many people completely ignored her situation... or likely not even aware of what's going on around them.

It's little things like this that make me really concerned for the future.
 

BigDaddyLH

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Kelowna, BC, Canuckistan
It's changed that's for sure, the other day we'd just been food shopping at the supermarket and we loaded up the car and got in and just over the way there was an old lady who was clearly struggling to get her shopping into her car and hang on to the trolly .. um, 'Grocery cart' I think you call them (the car park is on a bit of a slope) anyway I get out of the car and go over to ask if she needs some help and would she like me to hold the trolly for her while she puts her stuff away. She was very thankful and told me she was struggling because she was 'waiting for a new knee', she must have been at least in her 80's. anyway to cut a long story short... I don't say this to big myself up, it was nothing, but it was Saturday, it was busy and you don't need me to tell you how many people completely ignored her situation... or likely not even aware of what's going on around them.

It's little things like this that make me really concerned for the future.

It's those little thing that cost you nothing but mean a lot to the other person.

I'm more optimistic about the future. I see the good in people and good all around me.
 

Greggorios

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NY
My approach is to try to give people the benefit of the doubt. Even if they don't deserve it, perhaps.
"Assuming good intent" is a slogan someone suggested to me a while back and I've found it to be a useful tool to use the moment I start reacting to something that rubs me the wrong way. For the people that clearly demonstrate that good intent was never intended, "...just walk away Renee" is usually the way to go. While lowering the hammer can feel like the right thing to do it usually just leaves me with an emotional hangover. Life's too short.
 

Si G X

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England
It's those little thing that cost you nothing but mean a lot to the other person.

I'm more optimistic about the future. I see the good in people and good all around me.

I try, I really do. 😁

I think most people are good, I just think many are disconnected in some way. The last couple of years haven't helped that... along with self service checkouts and all that stuff. It's all very depressing to me if I'm honest.

There will be books written on 'the lost art of human interaction' at some point I expect!
 

JIMMY JAZZMAN

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I actually feel sorry for "these" people. Perhaps they never were parented in a positive way.
Or even sat down with a Telecaster, in a good amp and played some "blues". In the overall
scheme of things, what comes around, goes around. Being good shouldn't be that hard, but
society makes it challenging. Stay good, that really makes "them" crazy.
 

notmyusualuserid

Friend of Leo's
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In the South
Coming from the older generation, I agree all the sentiments expressed here except "grow a thicker skin". The "ignore" feature can make your forum experience much more pleasant. I've only had to use it a few times and not in quite awhile. Ah, if only the real world had an ignore button.
I'm older than you. ;)
 

BigDaddyLH

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Kelowna, BC, Canuckistan
I try, I really do. 😁

I think most people are good, I just think many are disconnected in some way. The last couple of years haven't helped that... along with self service checkouts and all that stuff. It's all very depressing to me if I'm honest.

There will be books written on 'the lost art of human interaction' at some point I expect!

I think the past two years of the thing we can't talk about may have isolated people, but people are snapping back, if that's the right metaphor (checks... not it's not). My gauge is talking to people while I'm walking Harley. Not on the street, where's it's busy, but on the trails above my neighbourhood:

20200515_121459.jpg


People are friendly and chatty! I recognise people from other walks and even if we don't know each other, they are always polite. Maybe we should all get dogs!
 

Si G X

Friend of Leo's
Joined
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Posts
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Location
England
"Assuming good intent" is a slogan someone suggested to me a while back and I've found it to be a useful tool to use the moment I start reacting to something that rubs me the wrong way. For the people that clearly demonstrate that good intent was never intended, "...just walk away Renee" is usually the way to go. While lowering the hammer can feel like the right thing to do it usually just leaves me with an emotional hangover. Life's too short.

It can be useful in giving you some time to think about your own reaction, but I also think that it's best not to assume anything.

I think it's usually just better to ask them, in my experience people will usually say "Sorry, I didn't mean it to come across like that" or "Sorry, that was out of order I flew off the handle" .... if you get a reaction like "Grow a thicker skin" then it's pretty clear what the intention was. How you choose to proceed is then up to you.
 

Si G X

Friend of Leo's
Joined
Dec 8, 2019
Posts
2,649
Location
England
I think the past two years of the thing we can't talk about may have isolated people, but people are snapping back, if that's the right metaphor (checks... not it's not). My gauge is talking to people while I'm walking Harley. Not on the street, where's it's busy, but on the trails above my neighbourhood:

View attachment 977253

People are friendly and chatty! I recognise people from other walks and even if we don't know each other, they are always polite. Maybe we should all get dogs!

well, I'm jealous! look at that. 😍
 




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