I never outgrew notions like friendship, love and loyalty...

bgmacaw

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Sure, I trust my friends...

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Cheap Trills

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Trying to teach my kids these things, but sadly I know it will only make them "weird" and cause them hurt since it's just not how other kids are being raised. Another parent was extolling the virtues of "I'd rather have my kid be a bully than be bullied" then giving an anecdote from a TV show and how it's preparing them for life. It's a cutthroat generation coming up, generation "me" is on its way in a boom.... and it's our fault, the cultures gotten out of hand.
 
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FuzzWatt

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Interesting timing this thread, I was thinking in this vein today.

I've had everyone I know turn their back on me at one time or another, and I never expected family to do it, and when they did it really stung. I disappeared deep down a bottle for many years afterwards and although I'm now sober, I don't think I'll ever forget the pain of knowing the people closest to you can turn when the bond becomes inconvenient for whatever reason.

People are easily bought and easily lost. This is my experience, and as a result I have very little loyalty nor time for anyone anymore. It isn't that I turn on people, I just choose to not let them close to me in the first place, because what's the point.
 

bottlenecker

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Trying to teach my kids these things, but sadly I know it will only make them "weird" and cause them hurt since it's just not how other kids are being raised. Another parent was extolling the virtues of "I'd rather have my kid be a bully than be bullied" then giving an anecdote from some TV show and how it's preparing them for life. It's a cutthroat generation coming up, generation "me" is on its way in a boom.... and it's our fault, the cultures gotten out of hand.

Not where I am. It seems the opposite. Bullies were real physical threats when I was a kid, and adults could be trusted to do absolutely nothing at all to stop it. That doesn't seem to be the case anymore. My kid starts school next month. I will do anything to keep him from being a bully or being bullied.
 

Dan German

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Not where I am. It seems the opposite. Bullies were real physical threats when I was a kid, and adults could be trusted to do absolutely nothing at all to stop it. That doesn't seem to be the case anymore. My kid starts school next month. I will do anything to keep him from being a bully or being bullied.
I have a granddaughter starting school in the fall. I don’t know what scares me more, the thought of her being bullied, or becoming one. She’s being raised right (as much as one can be sure of that), but it’s a strange and complex world, and you can’t be sure of anything. I do think that there is better support for those who are bullied than there was when I was young.

As for friendship, love, and loyalty in general? I don’t think those have ever been the universal commodities we wish they were.
 

Toto'sDad

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...and as I look around my little world,








I can't help but notice plenty of folks who have
You know when you're a kid in high school, and you swear those lifelong friendships where you'll always be loyal and true, and that little girl you were dating was always going to be your gal? Those are the finest hours most will ever know.
 

Chud

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Joining the Marines out of high school was the greatest decision of my life for many reasons. One of the most resonant is that I have a huge group of lifelong friends that a) I pretty much literally went to hell and back with, b) we’re nothing like each other except that we’re Marines who fought and (most of us) came home together, c) we will always have each others’ backs no matter what, and d) we have several built in reasons every year to get together and swap lies and pretend we’re 19 again.

SFMF
C.H.U.D.
 

FuzzWatt

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You know when you're a kid in high school, and you swear those lifelong friendships where you'll always be loyal and true, and that little girl you were dating was always going to be your gal? Those are the finest hours most will ever know.

“I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?”

-Stephen King
The Body (Stand By Me)
 

Toto'sDad

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Kind of comical for me sometimes. One of my runaround buddies who we drank, smoked, slipped into drive in movies, and the drags at Famoso, got drunk on New Year's Eve the first year of high school, you know that kind of buddy. He became a PREACHER! When him and his wife have been around me, I can hear the eggshells crunching he's walking on. ;)
 

Toto'sDad

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“I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?”

-Stephen King
The Body (Stand By Me)

That's what I'm talking about! It seems like everyone forgets, but I never do. Those guys from my past only a few left, but I would and have helped them anytime. It's really rare when you find someone who would reciprocate! My real buds are all pretty much gone.
 

Toto'sDad

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There's something about that way back time. I really know what the Blues Brothers were talking about when Elwood said, "It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses." And Jake said, "Hit it!" I've been there with a buddy before you really can't ever go back there. It's a heck of a feeling though, even if you have only known it a time or two.
 

nojazzhere

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...and as I look around my little world,








I can't help but notice plenty of folks who have
It seems that way......but sometimes I wonder if people just didn't do a better job of concealing their evil ways back in the "old days"? There has always been dishonesty, deceit, unfaithful spouses, scofflaws, you name it. Today, with the massive amounts of media coverage and internet outlets, I think (maybe) we have a greater awareness of what EVERYONE is up to. I know my father occasionally let a curse word slip out......but it didn't spew from his lips non-stop like so many adults today......and YES, VIRGINIA......that's an indicator of character. We (society) just don't have the "filters" that once existed.
 

FuzzWatt

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There's something about that way back time. I really know what the Blues Brothers were talking about when Elwood said, "It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses." And Jake said, "Hit it!" I've been there with a buddy before you really can't ever go back there. It's a heck of a feeling though, even if you have only known it a time or two.

My favourite scene! That reckless and circumstantial adventure that only happens during such an ephemeral period of life.
 

Jakedog

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My best friend when I was eight years old, is still my best friend today. My little brother and I are closer than we’ve ever been. I have some other close friends I’ve had for twenty years or better at this point. Not a lot, but enough.

There are still people who care about these things. As I get older, it does appear to be getting more rare. But it’s not gone. And, some of these younger folks are doing it right.

I was just talking with a friend last night about how we seem to be living in a culture where winning is everything. Society as a whole seems to be losing its collective grip on that sense of integrity that used to reel us in and remind us that it’s not enough to simply win, but that how we get there matters.

Well I haven’t forgotten, and I won’t allow my kids to, either. Maybe they’ll get laughed at. I know I do. I have people tell me all the time that I’m never going to get anything for myself without learning to step on folks. I guess there’s just not anything I need that badly. Lifting the whole is still more important to me than lifting myself.

I’m not religious. I don’t believe for a second I’m in for any kind of reward or punishment when I move on. I truly believe the only thing I’ll leave behind are people’s memories of me. It’s important to me that there be more good there than bad. That’s the sign of a life well lived. If that makes me a chump, I can live with that. I also feel just fine about setting that example for the humans I created.

I’ll never be perfect. I have failed at times to clearly see and do the right thing. I’m sure it’ll happen again. But it won’t ever be because I wasn’t trying or didn’t care. One of the things that keeps me going is the unwavering confidence that even though sometimes it feels like it, I am not the only one living this way.

We find what we go looking for. If we look for bad things and bad people, we can all clearly see there’s no shortage of them to find. Finding good things and good people is admittedly harder these days. But they are there, and the more we contribute to that side, the more others will see when they go looking. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
 

Dan German

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“I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?”

-Stephen King
The Body (Stand By Me)

My best friend when I was eight years old, is still my best friend today.
I bounced geographically when I was young. Good for the mind, not good for the social life. In January of 1975, I switched schools (9th grade) from middle-class Tulsa to working-class Winnipeg. A guidance counsellor at the school in Winnipeg thought it would be tough to adjust, so he pulled three guys out of class for the day to show me around. I remained friends with all of them through Grade 11, two of them through Grade 12, and one of them has been my closest friend until right now. In fact, he moved to my island, thousands of kilometres from where we started, and now lives 15 minutes away. I don’t think you choose loyalty and friendship, it just happens.

EDIT: I hope that guidance counsellor (name forgotten) had a good life, because he helped me have one with one simple act.
 




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