I am so dumb that _____.

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by RoscoeElegante, Oct 17, 2019.

  1. RoscoeElegante

    RoscoeElegante Friend of Leo's

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    Jump on the did-it-to-myself train as I turn my growls at an endless series of AWFUL student papers on myself. After all, I'm the one who chose this shaky racket. (And this keeps the thread from being "abusive.")

    I am so dumb that

    I once stared at an orange juice container for 20 minutes because it said "Concentrate."

    I'm listed in "Who's Who" as "What's That?"

    I once studied for a blood test.

    I tripped over a cordless phone.

    It takes me two hours to watch "60 Minutes."

    When driving to the airport, when I saw the sign that said "Airport Left," I just went home.

    When my wife said, "Make up your mind," I put lipstick on my forehead.

    I have to get naked to count to 21.

    My "I'm With Stupid" shirt is inside out.

    If you stand close enough to me, you can hear the ocean.

    I tried to party at the Electoral College.

    I thought innuendo was an Italian suppository.

    I stole a free sample.

    I (sometimes) still think that students can learn, and should work hard to try.

    YOUR TURN!
     
  2. Obsessed

    Obsessed Telefied Ad Free Member

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    :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
     
  3. boris bubbanov

    boris bubbanov Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

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    [​IMG]I'm so dumb that, I thought I could surf a whitewater wave with an SUV.

    After all, I am using my kayak rack.
     
    Last edited: Oct 18, 2019
  4. DugT

    DugT Tele-Holic

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    I don't know what I don't know.
     
  5. DonM

    DonM Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

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    I’m not dumb, and have this tattoo to prove it.

    797CA327-0B47-4B2D-BBDF-EB1E7A91A0AE.jpeg
     
    Seasicksailor likes this.
  6. getbent

    getbent Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I'm so dumb ________
    I think I can figure it out
     
    GoldDeluxe5E3 likes this.
  7. dogmeat

    dogmeat Tele-Afflicted

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    I needed a woman so I spent the night in a warehouse
     
  8. Bedder18

    Bedder18 TDPRI Member

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    ...I spent 10 minutes looking for my reading glasses so I could see how to fix my reading glasses (I only have one pair).
     
    getbent likes this.
  9. Unionjack515

    Unionjack515 Tele-Holic

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    Batavia, IL
    Much like Bill Burr admits, I am so dumb that I spent the first 39 years of my life thinking ponies were baby horses. When are they going to grow up???
     
  10. boredguy6060

    boredguy6060 Friend of Leo's

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    I can’t dig half a hole.
     
  11. Blue

    Blue Tele-Holic

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    I stood in the library by the "talking books" for 20 mins and they didn't say a word.
     
  12. william tele

    william tele Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

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    I'm so dumb I sometimes end a sentence with "LOL"!
     
    stevemc, Matthias, DrASATele and 2 others like this.
  13. DrPepper

    DrPepper Tele-Afflicted

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    Have you ever seen a dog do a face palm?
     
    Seasicksailor likes this.
  14. Digital Larry

    Digital Larry Tele-Afflicted

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    We had a power outage and I kept flipping on the light switches when I went to look for a flashlight.

    I only just now got the "Isle of Lucy" joke in Spinal Tap after 35 years.
     
  15. rcole_sooner

    rcole_sooner Poster Extraordinaire

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    I wouldn't eat a box of animal crackers, because the seal was missing.
     
  16. Seasicksailor

    Seasicksailor Friend of Leo's

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    That should have been:

    A ledge is weakness

    No ledge is power!

    :D
     
    DonM likes this.
  17. Doctorx33

    Doctorx33 Tele-Afflicted

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    Atlanta
    When I was a boy I thought man made lakes were made by digging a huge hole and using hundreds of trucks full of water to fill it.
     
  18. brookdalebill

    brookdalebill Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

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    On my wedding night, I had to sit on the edge of the bed till the swelling went down.
     
    DonM and getbent like this.
  19. Matthias

    Matthias Friend of Leo's

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    My brother convinced his wife once that moths were female butterflies.
     
    getbent likes this.
  20. tlsmack

    tlsmack Tele-Afflicted

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    My boss told me all our burgres are hand shaped, so I made 50 of these:
    hand-burgers-gross-halloween-food-C.jpg
    [​IMG]
     
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