How Not To Advance Your Gig

Old Deaf Roadie

Poster Extraordinaire
Gold Supporter
Oct 11, 2017
Goonieville, OR
So, I have an annual client moving into the venue. This is a faith-based group who holds a worship service every night they are here, with seminar sessions during the day.
In the past, this group would bring in a cathedral organ as a demo unit from a dealer, then it progressed to "we just need a piano and a mic" (with a band materializing out of nowhere 20 minutes before their start time and expect a soundcheck). Spoiler Alert: There's no soundcheck, you will be lucky to get one monitor mix, and now everyone is going to suffer a 20 minute delay while you set up your gear.
This year, they "advanced" their gig. What a rare privilege to have a such a great band leader with as much foresight as this guy. The image below shows the extent of what they think I should know about their tech needs, and came with a "If it could all be ready by 3 PM, that would be great". Where's the beef. Telling me 9 XLR's tells be nothing, zero, zilch. Apparently, there is a drum. And a computer.
Spoiler Alert #2: It won't be ready because you told me nothing beyond a random thought, and "great" would be if you had supplied me with what I asked for to begin with, and that would be a stage plot. It takes next to nothing to draw it out on a piece of printer paper (or a napkin) and email or texme a picture of it. Instead, I am posting your lame reply to a bunch of strangers because they actually understand better than the "experienced" music teacher. Yeah, I went to college, too...
For the record, springing stuff on your audio provider at the last minute is the quickest way to have a bad night for everyone. Of course, it will be hilariously painful to watch you deal with it.
Rant over...


Mar 20, 2011
Fort Worth
I play a fair amount of full band live music, and I work with "subs" that other people hire all the time. Let me tell you the music director/school band leader titled folks that tell me about their "masters degree in education" are the some of the worst when the song is actually kicked off.

This is absolutely to be expected.


Ad Free Member
Mar 26, 2003
The North Coast
Hardly anyone in this business knows what the hell they’re doing anymore. It gets worse all the time.

If one more person tells me to lighten up because we’re just having fun I’m gonna lose it. I *can’t have* any fun when everything is disorganized and poorly handled and nobody knows what’s going on. I *can’t have* any fun when nobody knows how to be on stage. Which let’s face it, is a much different scenario than most rehearsal rooms. I can’t have any fun when people are late. Or when they have a cobbled together junk rig that makes freaky noises, cracks and pops, or maybe doesn’t work at all when they finally get it set up ten minutes after start time.

The folks in question in the OP obviously don’t even have any idea what a “Stage Plot” is, when it’s pretty glaringly obvious just from the name. Any minimally intelligent person could discern from the two words involved what was being requested. The person who sent that in just doesn’t care. But they’ll be all upset when things aren’t to their liking.

Sorry. Just a lot of crap flying around lately. @Old Deaf Roadie I’m sorry you’re having to deal with this. Best of luck.