Hahahaha sounds like NYPD. Sometimes it seems like the role of the NYPD is to make sure they never have to be responsible for ever helping anyone ever. I've never been that helpless in NY, thank god. But I have certainly needed guidance on my London Underground escapades and I was always aided with kindness and discretion. Too many times, perhaps, but you're only 19 once... thank you, London Transport. On a different note, 16 whiskies at a Manhattan bar must have cost you well over $100!