Hot, sweaty family wedding (could get messy)

Mike Eskimo

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Couple hours from now.

8 brothers and sisters . 3 dozen grandkids. And their spouses.
And all their kids. And the in-laws.

That’s just our side , not even counting friends.

And worse , these days ? everybody’s got an opinion/take/grudge/pot on a constant low boil .

Irish.

Oy.

Could get messy . 🫠

Oh - and the sciatica is acting up 🙄

My only saving grace/rip cord is, since it’s a “my family” function , I’m in charge of the exit/when we’re leaving.

I’m giving us 2.5 hours and then we Irish-goodbye it and walk out backward ! 😂
 

Kandinskyesque

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@Mike Eskimo, just the 6 siblings and so far I'm the only one with grandkids (4 of but some siblings are still in their 30s), however my parents are still kicking around and we average 3 kids per sibling.

My mother insists on everyone round for dinner on Easter Sunday all 39 of us (need a letter from the Pope in triplicate if unable to attend).

Opinions also getting stronger and less restrained with time, particularly where alcohol is involved and that's just the kids

And yes, Irish (parents).

We're not even close to being the largest family where I grew up.
 

bettyseldest

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Although Betty was one of thirteen, I only invited ten from the Yorkshire side. My Irish wife, one of eight, invited just about all of her side. Which was a shame, as it was the Irish side that started the fist fight in the evening.

That said, six years ago at my daughters wedding, my ex-wife got upset and threw a cup of tea over the groom, who then threw a punch at her.`

I hate weddings.
 

getbent

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DUDE! We are attending our nieces wedding at 5 tonight. it is like 95º! Fortunately, open bar, but the caterer is 'upscale mexican' so, with this crowd, that could mean too much cotija and just okay, when it could rock.

I'm gonna have a couple of drinks fo sho. I provided the PA, so, hopefully that part works out... serenity now!
 

slauson slim

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Work the room, makes sure all attendees see you, have some food, and when a crucial moment occurs - speeches, cake cut, first dance…. - leave. No one will notice or miss you. Above all, don’t drink alcohol. Weddings are not conducive to congenial imbibing.

Last wedding I went to was in Bryant, Texas in July of 2021. Broiling hot, outdoors, and I was in a suit. Bride had her large extended multigenerational Tejano family. Groom was Anglo Ivy League undergrad and law school, and his guests were school friends, some of whom were South Asian. Tailgating, and then caterer provided bottomless margaritas before event. The whole thing was mad fun. BBQ brisket and tacos served. Bride and Groom walk-off song was 2Pac California Love, and DJ played tejano, R&B, country and Trap for dancing.
 
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Ronzo

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So we're about 3 hours in from the OP, I wonder how it's going? :lol:
I can pretty much guarantee that the photographer is itching for the cake to be cut, so they could leave after getting a couple of goodbye shots to close the album.

25+ years as a wedding/event photographer, over 2,500 affairs photographed, here. Most were normal. A small percentage were not.
 

Mike Eskimo

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So we're about 3 hours in from the OP, I wonder how it's going? :lol:

Success !

We worked every inch of that place - had convos with all the important folks , wife showed off what 10 months of NOOM can do (she’s like a blade of grass) and then she said let’s step out and get some air.

What she really wanted was to put her comfort sandals on , we were already in the car when she did it, and we both said at the same time - “or - we could leave ?”

Boom - gone ! And our time ? 2.5 hours on the dot - unplanned.

Just felt right .
 

getbent

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Success !

We worked every inch of that place - had convos with all the important folks , wife showed off what 10 months of NOOM can do (she’s like a blade of grass) and then she said let’s step out and get some air.

What she really wanted was to put her comfort sandals on , we were already in the car when she did it, and we both said at the same time - “or - we could leave ?”

Boom - gone ! And our time ? 2.5 hours on the dot - unplanned.

Just felt right .

you did better than we did. The heat was incredible, the ceremony was needlessly verbose. The kid's vows were okay, but the officiant blathered needlessly. The couple appropriated a bunch of different cultures in the process which was kind of hilarious because they love to point out cultural appropriation as being an egregious sin... so, the irony was rich and kind of amusing.

Cocktail hour---> terrible bartender and not well organized. BUT they had a HUGE rack of very strong (and salty) Palomas pre prepared that the rank and file (and youngsters) hammered which led to many being inebriated.

food--> 'upscale mexican' oy. dinner took like 2.5 hours and was a disaster. Not enough, not very good, and just a general disappointment.

Highlights--> the cousins did 'Roll um Easy' on guitar and mandolin and it was incredibly good.

fun to catch up with some elderly relatives.

fantastic lemon bars.

and home by midnight. super fun to go with my kids and have them have fun, and all of us could gossip about what we heard and learned from our various conversations... much laughter about some drunken activity of some relatives.... and two happy people--> my niece and her husband... Glad it is in the past!
 




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