I gave up on playing tennis a long time ago, because when it comes to tennis I am The Big Bam, The Sultan of Swat, The Caliph of Clout, The Home Run King! But apparently, hitting the ball out of the court and into the next county is not actually what tennis is about, as several highly annoyed tennis partners have tried to explain to me over the years. And besides, I never could figure out where the bases are on a tennis court and when I asked people they just looked at me funny and walked away. But a couple of weeks ago, Mrs. Steerforth brought home two electric tennis rackets. But they’re not for tennis, they’re for flies. I had mutilated several dozen regular fly swatters recently, and I guess she got tired of finding them bent and broken. And trust me, with horses around, you need anti-fly weaponry. These things are great! You press the button on the handle and swing at the fly and they get to ride the lightning! Sparks, excellent electrical sizzling sounds, the works. And I’m getting good with these things, too! I’ve nailed quite a few in mid-air with the old Wimbledon backhand. If you don’t have a couple of these, you’re missing out. Personally, being half-bright with building tube amps, I want to take one apart and see how they work. I’d like to build a really big one out of tough, reinforced hardwood, with a circuit that would turn everything in its path to cigarette ash instantly! Yes, look into these electric fly swatter tennis rackets. Highly recommended!