Ethical question. What to do?

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by Twin and Twang, Oct 5, 2011.

  1. String Tree

    String Tree Doctor of Teleocity

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    Does he want to be forgiven?
    Does he think he did anything wrong?

    Come clean with your friend. When friends can't talk to each other about something, the friendship is in trouble.

    Choose your words and when you say them as carefully as you can.
     
  2. A.B.Negative

    A.B.Negative Friend of Leo's

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    Say nothing. If the people directly involved don't think it's worth bringing up then that's their decision. If you bring it up then you run the risk of being seen as the troublemaker.
     
  3. TaylorPlayer

    TaylorPlayer Tele-Afflicted

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    This.... :D
     
  4. Red Square

    Red Square Friend of Leo's

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    Stay out of it completely. Being involved in any way just puts you in a bad light.
    Move forward as if you were never made aware of it.
     
  5. emu!

    emu! Poster Extraordinaire

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    If the woman who got her butt pinched didn't object, then it is no one elses business.
     
  6. TJNY

    TJNY Friend of Leo's

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    Yeah, not your business! Keep yer yapper closed and carry on!!
     
  7. Durtdog

    Durtdog Poster Extraordinaire

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    This is second hand information?
    Mind your own business.
     
  8. Bolide

    Bolide Friend of Leo's

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    Socrate's rebutal "Cannot an injustice be done by returning a sword to its rightful owner when he is drunk, or telling the truth to a madman." seems a little hyperbolic for this particular, but it points out that you are likely to cause a greater injustice by speaking than by remaining silent.

    Be a friend to the two (or three ?) whom this bum has dissed, be ready to offer aid and comfort when the inevitable happens, but do not hasten the day.


    And his state of toxification only means that he was acting on his inner lack of moral compass without caution, not that he had a moral compass that just wasn't working that night.
     
  9. jtees4

    jtees4 Tele-Afflicted

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    myob
     
  10. Nub

    Nub Friend of Leo's

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    She needs to tell her husband what happened, and the two of them need to work out how to handle it with the scumbag. Also, if she doesn't confront the guy at some point about what he did, it will really bother her.
     
  11. tap4154

    tap4154 Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

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    Two words: Jerry Springer
     
  12. Twin and Twang

    Twin and Twang Tele-Meister

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    Hey folks this is all great stuff!...

    Kelnet: Yeah, I'm new to the forum, but didn't want to spread the rumor to any of my close friends. So, I can stay semi anonymous here and get a good idea of how to respond. Or, not respond at all! Which seems to be the consensus. Kind of like ask the audience in who wants to be a millionaire.

    Brad Pittiful: Totally didn't mean to knock your comment. Drunkenness should always be considered!

    Tap4154: Totally the perfect end to the question! Jerry Springer:D

    Thanks all!! Now to forget it happened and go back to some guitar playin'
     
  13. telleutelleme

    telleutelleme Doctor of Teleocity Silver Supporter

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    Bass player and a drummer at odds? Stay out of it. One of them will end up homeless and at your place.

    Truthfully stay out of it. Any reason works for this choice.
     
  14. stantheman

    stantheman Doctor of Teleocity

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    "Time Wounds All Heals" -Richard P. Quinn :cool:
     
  15. purpletele

    purpletele Friend of Leo's

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    I understand the logic of minding your own business, but consider if she'll feel hurt that you know and didn't tell her. That matters too.

    You probably know if that would bother your friend or not. It WOULD bother me.
     
  16. imsilly

    imsilly Friend of Leo's

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    I say next time you are with your best friends wife goose her and if she gets angry yell, "WELL YOU LET X DO IT AT HIS WEDDING SO WHY CAN'T I?!" Then all the attention will diverted onto X and away from you. Then you could watch as the chaos ensues. As a bonus you got to cop a feel of your best friends wife, which would be cool!

    Or you could just ignore it ever happened.

    I kinda did a similar thing at a wedding, but instead I felt up a bridesmaid in front of my girlfriend. Sure some people were pissed (mostly those I'll never meet again and one or two I don't really care about) for like a week. Plus I only did it to get a rise out of the bridesmaid because she was well uptight and I guess people thought it was funny enough to see the look on her face to forgive me. Then again I have quite forgiving friends.

    Though I'm probably not the best person to take advice on these matters because I have a very laissez-faire attitude to life.
     
  17. Elias Graves

    Elias Graves Friend of Leo's

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    I'd tell my wife what I heard, but since I didn't see any of it myself, I wouldn't speak to anyone else about it.

    EG
     
  18. chrisgblues

    chrisgblues Tele-Afflicted

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    Agreed 100%. STAY OUT OF IT! No good can come from your involvement.
    JMHO.
     
  19. Gilamnstr

    Gilamnstr Tele-Afflicted

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    I had a similar dilemma several years ago when I discovered that my best friend's wife was cheating on him. I didn't want to be in the middle of it - but on the other hand, several other people in our circle of friends knew that I knew about it, and I felt that if he heard it from somebody else down the line and found out that I knew and didn't tell him, he'd feel like I betrayed him. I ended up telling him, and to make a long story short, it destroyed our friendship.

    Likely scenario in your situation: He'll deny doing it and since she didn't tell her husband about it, she'll probably deny that it happened. The revelation will create a huge fight between the groom and his wife, and your best friend and his wife. Their wrath will probably all be turned toward you for creating all the hate and discontent. I agree with those who said stay out of it...you've got nothing to gain and a lot to lose.
     
  20. Mike_LA

    Mike_LA Tele-Afflicted

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    +1
     
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