Craigslist/Reverb description that says "don't buy"

I bought an Epiphone Les Paul Custom for about half the new price because it had one of those cracks (it was otherwise new). I figured I didn't care so much how it looked and I could glue it closed later if it became a problem. It's never been a problem. Saved a few hundred dollars.

 

If I see the word "rare" anywhere in the title, or first few sentences of the description I move on. Even quicker if its bolded, or colorful font, etc.

This goes for guns, guitars, tools, boats, etc.

 

"Upgraded..."

Nope.

 

"An easy fix." So why haven't you fixed it?

 

I always find it funny when they put "rare" in the listing but it's something like an Epiphone that you know was mass produced. Vintage is another one...I don't consider a five year old guitar to be called vintage...

 

When they go out of their way to tell you that the natural-finished guitar is made of WOOD.

 

A “collectors item!!”

No. Sometimes things are just discontinued. Often for a very good reason!

 

"I don't know much about guitars..." then lists every nuance & collectible feature known to man. In other words, it's a fake, I know it's faked and when you point something out as being fake I'll reply with the same puzzled look your dog gives you.

"100% original/stock...EXCEPT: pickups, wiring, knobs, re-finished, case, switches, nut, tuners, decal, binding, pickup covers, pickguard, strap knobs, jack, bridge, saddles. The switch tip and pickguard screws are 100% original, local HUGELY respected guitar guy says so."

"Well known tech/luthier/drunken bullsh!tter in local bar says he's totally never seen one in this shape before...and Jimi once threw up on him! He knows his stuff! Incredible! Amazing! Super RARE!"

"Undocumented prototype for sale. Gen4 noiseless Strat pickups found by Leo's gardeners next door neighbor hidden away in Leo's tackle box...hand built in 1956!"

"Broken headstock repaired by well known luthier Claude Balls Jr. and stronger than before. Can support the weight of a collapsing star now!"

"BEST guitar I've ever owned!!! Act now before I change my mind and decide to keep."


Every sentence ends with !!!! !!!! !!!!! !!!! (Did I forget punctuation in the last sentence?) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Makes every point with....BOLD....BOLD TYPE! BOLD!!!!!!!!

SO INCREDIBLE AND RARE IT'S ALL UNDERLINED, BOLD AND ALL CAPS !!!!!!!!!!!

 

"SELLING:"

Mm hmm. Kinda knew that

 

"I really hate to see this go, but..."

 

"I'm selling for a friend and know nothing about Guitars"

 

For real.

"Easy fix, just needs a $5 thing-a-ma-boo and you're golden."

Then, I dunno, maybe drop in the thing-a-ma-boo and tack on 5 bucks to the price?

 

“...best guitar I’ve ever played.”

 

Normally they say that to avoid people sending them a message asking if its still for sale or making an offer then backing out before they can set up a time and place to buy it. I had that problem real bad trying to sell a guitar on craigslist last year. I swear people would send me messages on there just get a response, because they had nothing else going on and no one to talk to.

 

Which proves the madness of relic’ed guitars.

 

The one that gets me is "Won't last".
Well, if you think it won't last, why bother saying it?

 

I have seen the neck crack frequently on strats. You can usually tell if it's just a finish crack because usually it goes in a slight curve about 2 inches long. If you press inside the curve there is some give because the paint has separated from the body underneath that area.

Usually nothing a bit of superglue wicking wont sort out and prevent from getting worse.

 

Some variation of the phrase. "might benefit from a neck reset", especially when it's obvious from
photos that a reset is badly needed.

 

ANY Squier or Epiphone, used, priced at $50 higher than what they go for brand-new.

Come on, man.