Breaking News! New Corp-Speak identified

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by geoff_in_nc, Jul 26, 2014.

  1. JayFreddy

    JayFreddy Poster Extraordinaire

    Age:
    54
    Posts:
    8,759
    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Location:
    Dallas TX USA
    It's good work if you can get it! :lol:
     
  2. 1293

    1293 Poster Extraordinaire

    Posts:
    7,434
    Joined:
    May 18, 2006
    What ever happend to just getting **** done?
     
  3. Murky

    Murky Tele-Meister

    Posts:
    431
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2009
    Location:
    Central Florida
    I've sat in too many meetings with all the project double-talk. Some of us with a sarcastic side would occasionally play "buzz-word bingo" by trying to catch all the old phrases and add new ones. The wheels thought we were giving their BS approval when we'd say "bingo" during a particularly good stretch. They remind me of Satch Mahoney's language contortions in the old Bowery Boys movies.
     
  4. stnmtthw

    stnmtthw Friend of Leo's

    Posts:
    4,348
    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2012
    Location:
    New Mexico
    To a certain type of manager, the appearance of getting **** done is more important than actually getting any **** done.

    And I work in management, so I see it every freakin day.
     
  5. Joe Sailor

    Joe Sailor Tele-Afflicted

    Posts:
    1,841
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2011
    Location:
    Longmont, CO
    I started working construction in the early 80's and engineering in the late 80's. the WWII vets were still there, getting **** done.
    Today it's managers who maintain metrics and mission statements.
     
  6. AirBagTester

    AirBagTester Friend of Leo's

    Posts:
    3,871
    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2010
    Location:
    Maryland
    Just when I was getting used to the much more pedestrian turn of phrase, "Let's put our heads together." I thought that one was pretty accurate since often after doing that I had a massive headache.
     
  7. ddewerd

    ddewerd Friend of Leo's Ad Free Member

    Age:
    60
    Posts:
    2,458
    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2003
    Location:
    Willow Springs, Great-State-of-Texas
    My un-favorite is

    "At the end of the day..."

    I hate it. Does that mean that at the end of the day tomorrow something will be different? Or you only have one day to accomplish it?

    I work in a huge company, so I am surrounded by it every day. I try not to get caught up in it, but every once in a while it gets the best of me and I think "Did I just say that?"

    Cheers,
    Doug
     
  8. idjster

    idjster VERY grateful member Silver Supporter

    Posts:
    5,109
    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2012
    Location:
    Saskatchewan, Canada
    My least favourite, at least in some of the religion/theology circles I roam in (long past history) is 'unpack' as in, "let's unpack the idea of divine grace" or something like that. Drives me crazy!
     
  9. blowtorch

    blowtorch Telefied Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    29,043
    Joined:
    May 2, 2003
    Location:
    Wisco
    I was told during my last review that I was expected to come up with "efficiencies" while I learned my new job (which is a combination of duties that used to be done by three different full time folks). Wasn't sure if that meant they thought I was inefficient, or that I should make notes on all the time saving shortcuts that I find as I go along, so they can fire me and share those with the new sucker they get to fill the position.

    I plan to tell them at my next review that I've learned that skipping lunch is a great "efficiency" (I miss a lunchbreak as often as not), but that I've still not learned how to be in two places at once.
     
  10. Rich_S

    Rich_S Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

    Posts:
    4,584
    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2006
    Location:
    Potsdam, NY
    Not necessarily. It's seems to me as though he's still thinking inside the box.
     
  11. rokdog49

    rokdog49 Friend of Leo's

    Posts:
    4,358
    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2010
    Location:
    Ohio
    That's pretty lame, but not nearly as good as the new one where my daughter works. When they are having a meeting to do detailed analysis, it's called "Deep Dive." It is actually written that way in their meeting schedules. These people are so full of ***t ...God help us all.
     
  12. regularslinky

    regularslinky Tele-Afflicted

    Posts:
    1,030
    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2004
    Location:
    NEPA USA
    Brilliant.
     
  13. BigDaddyLH

    BigDaddyLH Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    52,160
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2009
    Location:
    Kelowna, BC, Canuckistan
    If you want to be driven up the wall, you should hang out with Buddhists. All them koans and one-hand-clapping.
     
  14. AirBagTester

    AirBagTester Friend of Leo's

    Posts:
    3,871
    Joined:
    Nov 7, 2010
    Location:
    Maryland
    LOL :lol: why not just call it "space exploration" or "spelunking" or some other equally ridiculous euphemism?
     
  15. Post Toastie

    Post Toastie Poster Extraordinaire

    Posts:
    9,578
    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2008
    Location:
    California
    Just run it up the flag poll and see if anyone salutes it.
     
  16. creading

    creading Tele-Holic

    Posts:
    588
    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2012
    Location:
    California
    Lot of low hanging fruit to be picked here. Don't let it ripen on the tree! Lets see if we can shift the paradigm and create a new vantage point.
     
  17. adeiderich

    adeiderich Tele-Afflicted

    Posts:
    1,612
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2011
    Location:
    Medina, Ohio
    I hate when I have to "double-click" on a topic, I never know what to do. Back in the early 2000's the book "Good to Great" was the corporate buzz bible........"Good to great companies first got the right people on the bus–and the wrong people off the bus–and then figured out where to drive it." If you ain't "on the bus", you don't have a job!
     
  18. Nogbad

    Nogbad Tele-Holic

    Posts:
    876
    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2007
    Location:
    Washington UK
    He actually pronounced Socialise with a "z" ha ha what an ignoramus!
     
  19. BigDaddyLH

    BigDaddyLH Tele Axpert Ad Free Member

    Posts:
    52,160
    Joined:
    Sep 1, 2009
    Location:
    Kelowna, BC, Canuckistan
    Makes me wonder what a British pointy-haired boss would be like.
     
  20. idjster

    idjster VERY grateful member Silver Supporter

    Posts:
    5,109
    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2012
    Location:
    Saskatchewan, Canada
    I Know! I often fall asleep to the sound of one hand clapping...:lol:
     
IMPORTANT: Treat everyone here with respect, no matter how difficult!
No sex, drug, political, religion or hate discussion permitted here.


  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.