Separate names with a comma.
Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by noah330, Dec 5, 2019.
here ya go
I'm pretty sure that the OP was just trolling, and now we're 6 pages in.
Double Trolling: Blooz Daddies and Bro Bros.
"Dan German and his Bro-Klezmer All-Stars".
An interesting thread that would not exist without @noah330 starting it, so I think bashing him is not really appropriate. It should be a conversation about the topic. What this thread demonstrates is the emotions that music brings to the world. Some feel that part of sharing their music to others can include entertaining apparel. It is part of the life on stage called "presence" and chosen by those on stage. It is as simple as that. "Cultural appropriation" is over thinking it. A band typically wants to be liked, popular and most of all desirable for the next gig. They make choices of music they play, arrangements, strategy for their sets and yes, even the clothes they wear. It is all part of entertainment. No different than the sharecropper wearing their "Sunday best" to play at the Saturday night honky tonk. Ya ain't ever gonna see a cowboy rounding up the herd wearing a nudie suit ... unless it is for entertainment at a rodeo.
I know! Those people in the Philadelphia Philharmonic Orchestra never even knew Beethoven either! Much less they don't ever have to deal with maggots in their food, piss/crap in the streets or the black plaque either like them good ole boys, Mozart and Bach! It pisses me off them damn college educated musicians faking that stuff.
Test to see if you are allowed to play the blues:
THE BASICS OF THE BLUES...
1. Most Blues begin with: "Woke up this morning..."
2. "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the Blues, unless you stick something nasty in the next line like, "I got a good woman, with the meanest face in town."
3. The Blues is simple. After you get the first line right, repeat it. Then find something that rhymes - sort of: "Got a good woman with the meanest face in town. Yes, I got a good woman with the meanest face in town. Got teeth like Margaret Thatcher and she weigh 500 pound."
4. The Blues is not about choice. You stuck in a ditch, you stuck in a ditch...ain't no way out.
5. Blues cars: Chevys, Fords, Cadillacs and broken-down trucks. Blues don't travel in Volvos, BMWs, or Sport Utility Vehicles. Most Blues transportation is a Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Jet aircraft and state-sponsored motor pools ain't even in the running. Walkin' plays a major part in the Blues lifestyle. So does fixin' to die
6. Teenagers can't sing the Blues. They ain't fixin' to die yet. Adults sing The Blues. In blues,"adulthood"
means being old enough to get the electric chair if you shoot a man in Memphis.
7. Blues can take place in New York City but not in Hawaii or anywhere in Canada. Hard times in Minneapolis or Seattle is probably just clinical depression. Chicago, St. Louis, Kansas City, Memphis, and N'awlins are still the best places to have the Blues. You cannot have the Blues in any place that don't get rain.
8. A man with male pattern baldness ain't the Blues. A woman with male pattern baldness is. Breaking your leg 'cause you were skiing is not the Blues. Breaking your leg 'cause a alligator be chomping on it is.
9. You can't have no Blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is wrong. Go outside to the parking lot or sit by the dumpster.
10. Good places for the Blues:
* a. highway
* b. jailhouse
* c. empty bed
* d. bottom of a whiskey glass
11. Bad places for the Blues:
* a. Nordstrom's
* b. gallery openings
* c. Ivy League institutions
* d. golf courses
12. No one will believe it's the Blues if you wear a suit, less you happen to be an old person, and you slept in it.
13. Do you have the right to sing the Blues?
* a. you're older than dirt
* b. you're blind
* c. you shot a man in Memphis
* d. you can't be satisfied
* a. you have all your teeth
* b. you were once blind but now can see
* c. the man in Memphis lived
* d. you have a 401 K or trust fund
14. Blues is not a matter of color. It's a matter of bad luck. Tiger Woods cannot sing the Blues. Sonny Liston could have. Ugly white people also got a leg up on the Blues.
15. If you ask for water and your darlin' gives you gasoline, it's the Blues. Other acceptable Blues beverages are:
* a. cheap wine
* b. whiskey or bourbon
* c. muddy water
* d. black coffee
The following are NOT Blues beverages:
* a. Perrier
* b. Chardonnay
* c. Snapple
* d. Slim Fast
16. If death occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it's a Blues death. Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is another Blues way to die. So are the electric chair, substance abuse and dying lonely on a broken-down cot. You can't have a Blues death if you die during a tennis match or while getting liposuction.
17. Some Blues names for women:
* a. Sadie
* b. Big Mama
* c. Bessie
* d. Jennie
18. Some Blues names for men:
* a. Joe
* b. Willie
* c. Little Willie
* d. Big Willie
19. Persons with names like Michelle, Amber, Jennifer, Debbie, and Heather can't sing the Blues no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis.
20. Blues Name Starter Kit:
* a. name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, etc.)
* b. first name (see above) plus name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Peach,
* c. last name of President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.)
For example: Blind Lemon Jefferson, Pegleg Lime Johnson or Cripple Peach Fillmore, etc.
21 - I don't care how tragic your life is: if you own a computer, you cannot sing the blues, period.
the boy has talent
Let me ask, then, what is "Blooze"?
That was pretty long so I just sorta skimmed it, but did you include the facts that you can't play the blues in air-conditioning or on a PRS?
Ham-fisted attempts at blues music by people who really have no business even trying.
Probably in the suburbs
Yeah hahaha I guess I talked myself into a corner!
But really, you're self examples are the opposite of what I presume the OP is talking about in terms of graybeard blooze dudes all wearing the same basic getup topped by a fedora.
I don't equate wearing a garment from an iconic garment district with wearing a uniform like costume for da blooze jam.
And I also love my multi culti life experiences from times when i lived and moved through ethinc tribal communities like the Southeast Asians, Puerto Ricans and Greeks in Lowell MA or the Hasidic Jews, Puerto Ricans, Dominicans, Chinese, African American (more American than African) in NYC.
Then there's the ex con and biker clans in 12 step meetings, both common US subcultures though not ethnic based.
Sadly my evolving dressy styles always end up co-opted by one trend or another, and my last one got taken by hipsters, though thankfully they quickly moved past the sorta punk junkie biker hardcore whatever the hell an old Police jacket jeans and black combat boots embodied.
I think one of the best compliments I've gotten was that I don't adhere to any trends.
Another that made me really happy was a Puerto Rican home girl who said: "ooh, you ugly!".
I'm pretty sure she was Puerto Rican because that hood also had Dominican and they stayed separate in style.
Up in Maine I really miss the many distinct cultures I moved among in Boston and NYC.
Bought my last biker jacket in maybe 1999 and really can't bring myself to wear it any more.
Not sure if that makes sense though.
That me was laid to rest.
I love though the blues documentaries by guys like Scorcese and Walter Hill, it's there I learned about blues legends like Lightnin Boy Malone
The internet is really a virtual bridge which we all hide under, hurling anonymous comments from the safe darkness.
Trolling may be helpful, benign, funny, obnoxious, rude or cruel, but it's all trolling.
Random results are seldom controlled by an OP and the nicest questions can start a fire while the most obnoxious can result in many defending rather than attacking.
Never mind that readers have a 50/50 chance of hearing the total opposite of a post's intentions.
I know this came up in another thread, but it's kinda getting rehashed here.
I think you can play the blues if you've had troubles. Relationship troubles, money troubles, job troubles. I've heard it all in the blues.
The blues isn't a defunct style of music, because it speaks to a commonality in all of us: trouble.
So, if you ain't had troubles, you can't play the blues. That's about the sum total in my mind. If you can speak your troubles on your instrument, well, I guess you can start playing those blues.
Good point, especially the PRS thing...
What about jump-blues?
I don't hear any trouble a'tall there
whatta bunch of imposters
Lost in translation you might note that the OP is a college educated pro musician who does music scores for Nat Geo among other clients. He calls amps "maps" and a pedal board a "pedal bored".
What else, he has one or two real Bursts and a bunch of other drool worthy vintage gear he bought with music earnings.
Nutty and sometimes abrasive but not worth getting too angry at...
We who maybe visit the music profession on weekends don't have to live in it.
Not sure that's an excuse...
Hmm... I'd have to research if there's any troubles on their other tracks. Maybe they hide their qualifications.