Perhaps deep down you like being depressed and like things that feed depression. Not that there's anything wrong with that. If some people are incurable optimist, I suppose the world finds balance in some of us being incurable pessimist. Personally, I don't care for bad endings, I've encountered enough of those in my own life. I know in most cases happy endings are make believe, but isn't most of life? Lots of things in our life are not real, we just pretend they are, sometimes forever, or at least until that big sandman visits that puts us to sleep for the last time. Note: Some would find my closing statement depressing, I find it neither depressing, or uplifting, only true. There is a difference.