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Another quit drinking thread...and thanks!

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by WilburBufferson, Jun 6, 2020.

  1. telemnemonics

    telemnemonics Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I wasn't down with a forever thing either, and fortunately most 12 step programs stress the just for today or one day at a time principle.
    Something we may not be able to see as a plus to not using chemicals for our happiness and well being, is that there are so many other great enhancements to happiness and well being.

    While we may come up with solutions on our own that work, the range of solutions we can learn about in 12 step meetings is far larger than an individuals imagination can come up with.

    Now I find that instead of wanting this or that thing to make me feel good, I have a sort of internal system of practices that have eliminated the idea that I need to "GET" something in order to feel good.

    Society is very focused on getting stuff that makes us feel good, and has little focus on the deeper well being that is not product or service/ event based.
    Even in med tech, Doctors have given up expecting us to take care of ourselves and offer pills for all our ills.
    Even the gym is a replacement for getting out and doing stuff, though not a bad replacement.
    I do know plenty of people who got addicted to working out, and need that until it stops working, at which point their lives and emotions go to crap.
    The flaw I see in using things outside ourselves to make our insides feel good, is that eventually we will get bored with the fixes, or one way or another they stop working, we need more and more, they are not longer available etc.

    Usually many different life affirming practices end up being what really lasts and keeps the formerly substance dependent individual happy in the long term.
    Then there is really no need to or interest in going back to dulling the brain with chemicals!
     
  2. Deeve

    Deeve Poster Extraordinaire Silver Supporter

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    Nocasters Anon ;)

    it's another recovery group that uses 12 steps and identifies a substance other than alcohol as something they were powerless over & contributed to making their lives unmanageable.

    OP - there are a lot of us on this platform.
    I'd welcome a PM if you have questions (will share my experience, etc) and I bet many others would, too.

    Peace - Deeve
     
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  3. telemnemonics

    telemnemonics Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Just one of the many "A's".

    AA
    NA (Narcotics Anonymous, named during the '50s when all illegal substances were called narcotics, and a program that considers alcohol to be just another drug)
    OA (overeating)
    GA (gambling)
    S&LA (sex & love obsession)
    CODA (for the codependent)
    Naranon/ Alanon (for family members crazed with the idea that they can fix their addict or alcoholic loved ones)

    ...off the top of my head...
     
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  4. Axegrinder77

    Axegrinder77 Tele-Afflicted Ad Free Member

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    Never a bad decision. Good luck!

    I recently tried (not the first time). After a couple weeks I realized that I can't really do it without help.

    I'm giving moderation one more try, and if it becomes a problem again, then I'll get the help needed to abstain entirely.

    Everyone is different, but there are some commonalities. If you find it's too tough at some point, but still desire to be on the wagon (which is great) then don't be afraid to get help. AA or counseling, whatever. It's not just the physical addiction that happens over time, but your lifestyle, and the daunting changes required in many ways.
     
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  5. braveheart

    braveheart Tele-Afflicted

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    Do you still have weak days,where you have to struggle?
    Clapton said in an interview, that,even after all those years being sober, it's still hard for him to see people drinking beer outside on a hot summer day...
     
  6. braveheart

    braveheart Tele-Afflicted

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    aah,ok,thanks..
     
  7. Old Plank

    Old Plank Tele-Afflicted Gold Supporter

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    Way to go Wilbur, use your happiness at how better you're feeling for further motivation!
     
  8. telemnemonics

    telemnemonics Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I figure it will probably come again one day, but really, I have not seen even the slightest attraction in drinking or drugging for happiness in many years.
    Kind of a mystery, as most I know in long term recovery do report the occasional urge popping up now and then.
    At work I'm offered this or that regularly, and I do not remove myself from that portion of society.
    My wife and her family drink, I sometimes have booze on the shopping list and have no problem buying it.

    I do not suggest this, particularly for the newer individual still learning to live the new way, whatever that ends up being.
    Now and then I have a relapse in a dream, and the feeling is not about "getting" to use.
    The feeling is about "losing" what I've "gained" in the long process of finding new kinds of more lasting fulfillment.

    Kind of like hearing the voice of your child at an Iron Maiden concert.
    (edit: chronic use of) Booze and drugs make it harder to enjoy the deeper joys that are not so loud and extreme.

    Likewise when I'm on the refined sugar treats, a good salad is just food to chew on.
    But get off the refined sugar and a salad is like dessert, just delicious sparkling brilliance of flavors and textures.

    Get off cigarettes and smells everywhere get stronger. (both good and bad of course) (further, I think it's easier to accept bad things in life when using drugs or alcohol, then when sober we may need to change some lousy friends, habits, jobs etc, as our values shift. Therein lies one of the mysteries of clean & sober living: some assume that life is automatically better off the sauce, but in reality there are usually many things to change when we try to find that new way to live)

    Stop shopping for more stuff and the stuff we already have gets more attention, usually resulting in better use of stuff compared to when we spend most of our time looking for the next online retail fix. Maybe we also refine what we have a little, and how we use it.

    I suppose a good long term romantic relationship could be similarly found more fulfilling than a string of one night stands, though we also have a part of us that may feel the need for a new mate, and lost interest in the one we love.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2020
  9. stratoman1

    stratoman1 Friend of Leo's

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    Now and then I have a relapse in a dream, and the feeling is not about "getting" to use.
    The feeling is about "losing" what I've "gained" in the long process of finding new kinds of more lasting fulfillmen



    I've had that dream a few times. It literally scares me to death to think that after all this time I could go back to being that stupid again. I almost woke up crying after one of them.

    I can have a sip of beer while cooking dinner but that's it. There are also some underlying medical issues to deal with as well, Mr. Liver still holds some sort of animosity towards me so that kind of helps keep a lid in things as well. I've seen people die from liver disese, not something I want to try myself
     
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  10. Frodebro

    Frodebro Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

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    I've had "the dream" as well, but not in a very long time. Coming up on fifteen years in September myself, and it has been an interesting journey. The first six months or so was pretty rough and took an awful lot of effort, and then at some point after that it became much easier. Nowadays it's not even a thought, I haven't had any cravings in longer than I can remember, and it doesn't affect me one way or the other to be around people who are drinking. Bars are equally no problem, but with the decline in live music over the past years I haven't had much reason to visit those establishments anyway.
     
  11. eddiewagner

    eddiewagner Poster Extraordinaire

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    Right on. I am also tired of beers right now. Just bought a case of alcoholfree beer.
     
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  12. Wolfschmidt

    Wolfschmidt TDPRI Member

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    I did several years of dry January’s, or 3 months off here and there, and finally decided, why am I putting myself through the misery of quitting, only to start right back again (and quickly get up to full steam again)?

    So a year and a half ago (New Year’s), I decided to just run with it, not set any goals or make any promises to myself, and just see how long I could go.

    So far so good. I do not crave alcohol at all but it is funny what random things trigger my sense memory (a tv show, cooking certain foods, the smell of finished yardwork).

    I cannot say quitting has made my life “better” (i.e., eliminating other personal problems), but it has certainly made my choices much simpler and easier. That is certainly peace of mind.

    Good luck, and always ask for help if you need it, there are plenty of us
     
  13. 24 track

    24 track Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

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    I havent read all of the threads, but My well wishes for your continued sucess are with you, once the initial buzz has passed then day by day is a non issue , great acheivement seriously
     
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  14. Skub

    Skub Poster Extraordinaire

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    Chin up bro,there's better things to be doing with your time and money. :cool:
     
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  15. BuckNekkid

    BuckNekkid Tele-Meister

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    It's estimated that one in ten people have a problem with alcohol. Ten percent. In a room of 100 people, odds are that ten will be alcoholic.

    However, only three or four of these will ever recognize and admit their problem. The end result of untreated alcoholism is insanity, prison and ultimately, death.

    Sobriety has unimaginable rewards. Unimagined when one is drinking, that is.

    Keep it up. One day at a time.

    (Sober 10,533 days).
     
  16. ucnick

    ucnick Tele-Meister Gold Supporter

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    Yeah, not a heavy drinker, but I am thinking it's about that time for me as well. Sure as heck isn't doing me any good.
     
  17. WilburBufferson

    WilburBufferson Friend of Leo's

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    UPDATE: almost two weeks later, 26 consecutive days, I've dropped 10 pounds and my mind is MUCH clearer. Last night was a test. Long day working, supervising schoolwork, cleaning, making meals. I really wanted a "reward" for putting in a good day. Instead, I bubbled up some carbonated water and decided to keep the momentum going. One day at a time (thanks Toto's Dad) got me through it. I'm sure I've already saved hundreds of dollars that would have been spent on libations. So for those of you contemplating a similar move, do it already! For those of you who have lent your support, thanks again!
     
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  18. Jimmy Owen

    Jimmy Owen Tele-Holic

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    Yes. You can do this.


    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
     
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  19. StevesBoogie

    StevesBoogie Tele-Holic Ad Free Member

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    Wow man, that's great! I hear you about the long day reward. I love the way you changed your perspective. I've fooled myself so many times with the silly 'long day reward' bullsheet. I have found flavored carbonated water to be a great substitute as well. Congrats!
     
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  20. Pualee

    Pualee Tele-Holic

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    Dunno how long it has been for me. I think about 10 years? It just struck me one day that I am supposed to stop, so I did.

    The longer it goes, the less you think about it. Fill the void with something else... time with the kids, time with friends, hobbies, whatever. Don't leave the void empty.
     
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