A story from my past, and the law of unintended consequences.

Toto'sDad

Tele Axpert
Ad Free Member
Joined
Jun 21, 2011
Posts
57,641
Location
Bakersfield
I'll tell you what, walk outside, look up and down the street till an eighteen year old dude walks by.
Have a close look at that slack jawed vacant eyed sucker, then forgive yourself.
I mean, the male brain is not even fully formed until the age of 25.
Cut yourself some slack :cool:

:::
You have a point. Fate, and my lack of knowledge thrust me into a situation, I was poorly equipped to handle. I'm not excusing myself, but some things as you say take some experience in life before you can even begin to navigate troubled waters. That whole episode had doom written on it from the beginning, but I did/could not read the signs.
 

Toto'sDad

Tele Axpert
Ad Free Member
Joined
Jun 21, 2011
Posts
57,641
Location
Bakersfield
As we age....you look back at events in your life. We see them different now, why?
I think the reason we view events from the past differently, is because we are viewing them, not in real time, but in a speeded-up frame of thought that allows us to view a complicated event, in a millisecond. Whereas in real life, it has taken considerable time for that event to unfold. It only takes me a second to remember jumping on a slow-moving freight with my dad as a child of eight years old, but in truth, it took quite a while for that event to actually happen.

We have only fleeting glimpses of the past, when we might have taken all day to complete something in real time. There has to be some changes in the way we view the past, and the reality of the past.
 

Tarkus60

Tele-Afflicted
Joined
May 10, 2020
Posts
1,175
Age
62
Location
Salem In
Or is it because we are a little smarter and little wiser.....and we can now see the mistakes that were made.
I am not very good at this. But your post sure got me thinking.
 

Tele-beeb

Friend of Leo's
Joined
Apr 2, 2012
Posts
3,647
Location
The Bluegrass
He took the bullet for you, good dog. I would not feel so bad as he had a good life with you.
I had a dog that took a bullet for my family
It’s a long sad story
The dog was a hero, and that is an understatement
His last moments were painful and alone, but he and I had so many great moments
Boy and dog
 

Toto'sDad

Tele Axpert
Ad Free Member
Joined
Jun 21, 2011
Posts
57,641
Location
Bakersfield
Or is it because we are a little smarter and little wiser.....and we can now see the mistakes that were made.
I am not very good at this. But your post sure got me thinking.
You post points out part of the equation of seeing things differently in reflection. When we are young and creating memories, we don't have a lifetime of experience to draw on as we create what will be memories in our future. Still, what we see in memory, is like looking at a video of an event we have participated in, rather than actually living that event. The video may even capture sounds occurring during the event, but not the feelings you had, the wind in your hair, the light filtering through the trees, the touch of your hands.
 

haggardfan1

Friend of Leo's
Joined
Mar 17, 2014
Posts
4,621
Age
58
Location
Texas, Louisiana, Texas again
I have had enough dogs in my life to have a couple such regrettable incidents. Only one was due to circumstances completely within my control; but it doesn't change the fact that it (they) haunt me now and always will. It's never a good feeling to let a canine pal down, they depend on us for everything.
 

JeffroJones

Tele-Meister
Joined
May 2, 2022
Posts
120
Location
Melbourne
but it doesn't change the fact that it (they) haunt me now and always will.
Mr. Haggard, you continue the theme of "past regrets".
I pointed out (in a flippant manner, no offence meant) that the "regrets" were made by our younger selves, who were not quite the fully rounded emotionally mature creatures we are today :)
Also, the regrets don't seem to be "invading Poland", "keeping human heads in the refrigerator" etc, they seem to be things that were badly handled, not deliberate wrongdoing.
In other words, a failure of judgement rather than a failure of morality.
Could it be, with maturity, we see more clearly the moral implications of an innocent lack of judgement?
Then maybe assess ourselves a little too harshly?
I have plenty of regrets too, I find them painful.
If I mentioned them, you would probably find them inconsequential, or maybe even funny 😂
Gosh-darn it!

:::
 

Toto'sDad

Tele Axpert
Ad Free Member
Joined
Jun 21, 2011
Posts
57,641
Location
Bakersfield
Mr. Haggard, you continue the theme of "past regrets".
I pointed out (in a flippant manner, no offence meant) that the "regrets" were made by our younger selves, who were not quite the fully rounded emotionally mature creatures we are today :)
Also, the regrets don't seem to be "invading Poland", "keeping human heads in the refrigerator" etc, they seem to be things that were badly handled, not deliberate wrongdoing.
In other words, a failure of judgement rather than a failure of morality.
Could it be, with maturity, we see more clearly the moral implications of an innocent lack of judgement?
Then maybe assess ourselves a little too harshly?
I have plenty of regrets too, I find them painful.
If I mentioned them, you would probably find them inconsequential, or maybe even funny 😂
Gosh-darn it!

:::
Your comments are very good, and accurate as far as nursing guilt and regret. It's hard not to do though. The longer we live the more baggage we carry around with us. I should say most of us. My wife handles grief and disappointment better than anyone I've ever known. She is just STRONG though physically she's not very big. She can simply put a disappointing, even tragic event in her life behind her, and that's the end of it.
 




Top