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Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by ce24, Jan 12, 2018.
My wife is a musician.
Me: "I have bought another guitar."
I keep referring to the red guitar when my wife and I talk about my herd. She says, "I like that one". There are 3 red guitars in my collection.
My wife came in and saw a guitar I have had for 8 years and asked where it came from.
I told her, and she says, "how come you never play this one?" which was the reason it was out...
I did just count up, and I have a few too many. Coming to a CL soon...
I always assumed that my wife paid little enough attention that she wouldn't know the difference between my guitars or even notice if I got a new one. Until...
There was a guitar magazine lying around and she found a picture of a guy playing a tele and said "hey that looks a lot like your guitar." I was prepared to condescendingly say 'why yes, they are both telecasters...' but upon glancing at the picture I realized they are both double-bound telecasters with a strat neck pickup and five-hole, three ply pickguards. Other than the color, they're more or less identical. I'm not sure if she noticed all of that but it made me question if I could sneak another one past.
Doesn't matter whether she beats you. It matters whether you like it.
See, I married a woman 12 years younger than me. She'll always be hot and young. Thinking ahead, I was.
My wife wanted me to buy a PRS, because she really likes the headstock. So I did.
Lately, she's been saying that there's room on the wall for another guitar, and that the White Falcon sure is gorgeous.
That's brilliant too and I think it may actually work!
I've heard this quite often "but you already have one in that color", meanwhile the one in the same color is a Les Paul, and I'm looking at a Duo Jet...the Duo Jet is especially challenging cause she also thought it looked exactly the same as the LP
This made me realise something
My girlfriend is a designer and very hot on colours. She could split out 12 indistinguishable shades of beige
Any time I have a new thing she spots it right away, despite not knowing whether something is acoustic or a solid bass or how many I have
I now realise this is down to her spotting 5 different colours of what I think of as blonde wood and knowing from the tiniest swatch she never saw it before
I don't stand a chance, do I?
My wife bought me this on our first anniversary, she told me that the guitar I had on a stand in the living room was the wrong colour, and that this one would suit the furnishings better. Every time I sell a guitar she asks "that's not the guitar I bought you, is it?". I have sold about a dozen guitars inthat time, not one of them sunburst or semi-acoustic.
This thread also made me realise that if someone asked me to describe all my girlfriend's clothes I would stop after blue jeans, black trousers and white t shirt
I could describe every guitar my buddy owns though
If anyone on here ever acted as witness in court you might find people say you have a 'selective memory' because you cannot remember every detail in your life
I flick back 'I remember memorable things' to this
All your guitars should be black. Give her a challenge, at least......
Rotate all guitars daily and place them in front of mirrors when possible .
Naaaaah - this is the internet
How many of us can make the claim that "our wife says we have 10" (or 9 if we're being honest)?
And, no; I am NOT recommending "pics or it ain't true"
I think the critical question here is whether the OP’s wife’s error was due to mis-counting or rounding. If this obscure branch of wife/guitar mathematics is related to rounding, well then...
I presently own four guitars: two Teles, a Hamer Sunburst, and an acoustic. If a wife applies rounding to this smallish herd, the result will be that I own ZERO guitars. This number would make my wife happy. I’m starting a partscaster project. When it’s finished I will own five guitars, but after we apply the wife math, I will suddenly jump from no guitars to ten! Can you imagine the uproar?
I think we need some scholarly types to fully study and describe this branch of mathematics so that we may fully understand its potential results.
My wife knows every thing about every thing I own , and she can count too,
That is a tough one. The outcome is hard to predict if you buy one or two more. Keep in mind the the sayings:
"If Mom ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. If Dad ain't happy, ain't nobody cares."
Least favourite colour. Shows all my fingerprints
Also, she could tell 10 duplicate blacks apart. As I type this I realise this can only have 1 explanation - witchcraft
That story she told me about a house falling from the sky onto her sister now makes sense