Steven Seagal: Please quit making movies, there isn't enough room on the screen for you.

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by Toto'sDad, Jun 12, 2019.

  1. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Just his size should be a deterrent, but his awful acting, and his lumbering around beating up people who obviously have to wait on him to catch his breath between moves borders on the disgusting. I got sucked into watching with the aid of the fast forward button one of his movies just a while ago. Okay, I was taking a nap, and waking up in between scenes but it's almost like fast forward. Steve, maybe stick to guitar playing, alone, in your bedroom, and for Pete's sake get a rug that fits!

    I say this to you as a brother Steve. You never fail to use (overuse) that phrase in your movies I thought it apropos to use it myself. And another thing, your wardrobe sucks. Can't you afford anything besides Salvy bedspreads as a costume? I mean c'mon man, at least buy some cargoes.
     
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  2. drf64

    drf64 Poster Extraordinaire Silver Supporter

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    But as long as he's making movies he isn't torturing a guitar.
     
  3. duzie

    duzie Tele-Meister

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    I cheered many years ago during this scene :D
     
  4. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    There is that, at least if you don't like his movies you can switch off the TV. (I doubt any of his movies make it to the big screen) (I always see them in the little three dollar rack on the floor at WalMart) A poor guitar that he's doing cruel and unusual things to, just has to lay there and take it.
     
  5. Erdowonge

    Erdowonge TDPRI Member

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  6. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    So did the audience and Goldie!
     
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  7. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    You just had to go and up the ante didn't you? Did you have to throw in the banjo, AND an accordion? :D
     
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  8. Erdowonge

    Erdowonge TDPRI Member

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    Muhahahaaa ..and dont forget the anvil
     
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  9. PlainAllman

    PlainAllman Tele-Meister

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    Haters gonna hate....:D
     
  10. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I actually saw the anvil lick, but my mind just went ahead and blocked that out like it should have! I'm not sure exactly what you would classify that (music) as. I used to be a grasser, but I don't think it would fit there. I hope they make it out alive wherever they're going!
     
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  11. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Aww like you don't know what I'm talkin' about, hey buddy ain't use a Texican?
     
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  12. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Steven is a party animal though once he gets going.

    [​IMG]
     
  13. Erdowonge

    Erdowonge TDPRI Member

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    They cover metal tunes in that style.they got a big following i believe ,toured the U.S.A few times i think. steve Segal is a boss though.Love his minimalist approach.Sidestep the assailant and send him through the window sort of thing.
    When did he last make a film though ? Is it in the cinema now?
     
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  14. WetBandit

    WetBandit Friend of Leo's

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    It's hard to think of anyone that is more of a worthless miserable sack than Seagal.

    He's about as low and as lame as someone can get...

    And I make these conclusions before ever taking into consideration the molestation of perfectly good and innocent guitars.

    When I was a kid Iiked his movies... but as I began to understand things I started to see him for what he truly is...

    It doesn't help that I know 2 other people exactly like him!!
     
  15. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Dear Mr. Seagal, if you happen onto this thread and get all worked up about it. My real name is Obsessed, I'm a clever man who built his own house out of material I pulled right out of the earth. Poor old TD is just someone I use now and then to post stuff like this. If you think this is hard to do, you really don't appreciate how clever I am and at building stuff. Remember before you go making any rash statements, I can hit a running dear at fifty yards during a urinal evacuation off the front porch.
     
  16. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

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    Something that was on one of the movie channels. It had some other people in it too, but he was the grand poobah. It looked like at the end they were setting it up to make another one just like it. I'll bet the copper cart wouldn't even stop on the set for that thing.
     
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  17. boris bubbanov

    boris bubbanov Telefied Ad Free Member

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    We're going to let you slide.

    Since you like in Van Zandt County. Has to be a cool place, with a name like that.
     
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  18. jrblue

    jrblue Tele-Afflicted

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    Who watches him? Seriously. It's right up there with watching a donkey take a dump. Why look? Life's rich pageant awaits. Watching this load is your best option?
     
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  19. boris bubbanov

    boris bubbanov Telefied Ad Free Member

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    I just don't understand all this rage against Segal.

    I think he's a quite passable singer and stringed instrument player:

     
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  20. PlainAllman

    PlainAllman Tele-Meister

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    To be honest I didn’t know he had anything to do with guitars and wasn’t aware he’d made any movies in the last 10 years but I got no reason to hate on him otherwise.
     
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