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ever feel like just giving it all up?

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by popthree, Jan 2, 2018.

  1. popthree

    popthree Poster Extraordinaire

    this is a different kind of post for me. i don't usually send my blue thoughts out onto the internet for the masses to read. i'm feeling very much like selling all but one acoustic and just forgetting about music, songwriting, and all that. i know i'm not great at it, but i have always told myself that i get something, some kind of connection, feeling, meaning from playing. now i'm not so sure.

    i record videos occasionally and share them with friends on facebook. i get very little positive response. i have done similar stuff here on the twanger central..same kind of thing. not much positive reaction to what i'm doing.

    i see other people, talented people, share songs in a similar way and get tons of love from friends and strangers alike.

    i'm only fooling myself, peoples lack of response does not lie....so why do this anymore ? sometimes it has to be about more than me playing for me and it making me feel good because i like it. it has to be about more than that.
     

  2. Billnchristy

    Billnchristy Tele-Holic

    820
    Sep 21, 2017
    Georgia
    It's all for you. If it doesn't do anything for you then find something that will.
     
    Gibson, KyAnne, Obsessed and 11 others like this.

  3. jackinjax

    jackinjax Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

    Sep 11, 2016
    Jacksonville
    Popthree, I don't know you, and I'm hesitant to be blunt, but, if you no longer play for your own enjoyment maybe it is time to give it up. Sorry.
     
    8barlouie, Nubs and Piggy Stu like this.

  4. tdoty

    tdoty Tele-Meister

    169
    Oct 17, 2011
    Albuquerque, NM
    I did that. Got tired of the band dynamic, had a family to feed, a full-time job, etc. Sold everything off....and muddled through for a while. I'd buy a cheap guitar now and then, keep it for a while, then sell it. Did that for about 17 years. Got a decent guitar a few years back and I'm sticking with it.

    I'm not worried about anyone else's thoughts on my playing, as I'm decidedly mediocre; I play for me.....and I think that's what it's all about.
     
    Gibson, KyAnne, zippofan and 13 others like this.

  5. Strum und Twang

    Strum und Twang Tele-Meister Silver Supporter

    245
    Sep 4, 2011
    Amarillo, TX
    Popthree, I think the effort of output (writing, recording, performance) requires occasional opportunities to engage in down time to recharge. It sounds as though you might need to cut back on getting yourself and your material out there and spend some time falling back in love with music itself.

    Play your guitar(s). Listen to the sounds you produce. Try different techniques, learn different chord voicings - and let the rest of the world handle it’s own affairs for a bit. Play for the fun of it - play for you. I think it’s OK to play music solely for oneself from time to time. God only knows the therapeutic value it has brought to many of us on this forum.

    I also recommend hanging on to your gear for a bit longer.

    Hang in there. Remember why it’s called “playing the guitar.”

    All the best to you.
     
    Gene O., ponce, Omiewise65 and 4 others like this.

  6. Frontman

    Frontman Tele-Holic

    751
    Jul 10, 2014
    Tokyo
    I don't play for other people's sake, which is a good thing, because most people would think I suck. Bad as I might sound to others, to myself I play passably well, and that is enough to keep me going.

    I don't do Fakebook, and never have, it's bad enough that I come here as often as I do.
     

  7. Piggy Stu

    Piggy Stu Friend of Leo's

    Feb 26, 2017
    UK
    Sometimes you got to get lost to find yourself

    If you walk across a desert for years then come to a river you want to dive into, it doesn't mean you can never get out of it again

    If I were you I would down tools and not worry about ever picking them up again

    Seasons change
     

  8. Mjark

    Mjark Doctor of Teleocity Silver Supporter

    Feb 14, 2011
    Annapolis, MD
    If approval is what you seek, create music people like. I mean hone your craft. Not create music calculated to appeal to the less discerning.
     
    Last edited: Jan 2, 2018

  9. xafinity

    xafinity Friend of Leo's Silver Supporter

    Dec 24, 2015
    my Mom's basement

  10. Kebmel

    Kebmel Tele-Afflicted

    Aug 8, 2008
    45 south
    I have the same thoughts and emotions, but to me, music is therapy and a good stress reliever.
    You could also join Fandalism and get plenty of good response for your music.

    Sometimes I take a break or ' holiday' from music for a few months, and
    come back to it really refreshed.
     
    Tommy Biggs likes this.

  11. charlie chitlin

    charlie chitlin Doctor of Teleocity Silver Supporter

    Age:
    56
    Mar 17, 2003
    Spring City, Pa
    Above is an answer not displaying an understanding of the problem.
    I've given up for 7 years...that was awhile ago...but was recently on the cusp of pitching it in again.
    I'm an average player but write good songs and have a good, well-rehearsed band that I've been with for 8 years.
    We do not have a following.
    We're signed to a small label and our album was played on almost 200 broadcast radio stations and we got some REALLY good reviews in places liike No Depression.
    If we can get a festival (or festival-type) gig where people are there to hear Blues/Roots-type music, they eat it up.
    People are shocked that all the songs are original and they say stuff like, "Who ARE you guys? Where have you BEEN?!?"
    The answer is, slogging it out for small groups of sullen inebriates in $h!tty joints.
    I enjoy playing music immensely, but I'm a PERFORMER...that's a huge part of it.
    The local music scene ain't what it used to be and, at 56, a lot of the people who like my kind of music are older yet, and don't come out much anymore.
    I think of it like acting.
    If I were putting on plays that nobody was coming to see, even if I LOVED acting, it would be depressing and sucky.
    Even if you can convince yourself (or have other people convince you) that you don't actually suck, if you can't get any positive feedback, it's basically the same as sucking.
    I don't need to be famous or anything, but I do REALLY miss the days of looking off the bandstand at a roomful of enthusiastic fans that I recognize.
    So, OP...I feel ya!
    Some can just sit in their room and play, or go out to the open mic, or whatever...they play for the love of playing.
    And there are those of us who want to perform in some way...a big part of the fun is being able to bring it to people; and if you can't get that done, things start to look glum.
    I wish I had the cure...
     
    Gibson, Skub, Southpole and 9 others like this.

  12. adjason

    adjason Friend of Leo's

    Jan 9, 2010
    virginia
    I kind of understand how you feel as I have recorded about 100 songs through the years at various studios and I share them with people. There are plenty of times when I feel that my best songwriting days are behind me. I've had some positive feedback but in the end I am my own biggest fan and when I play there are times when I get into a zone that is just theraputic. The beauty of songwriting is that maybe the next one will be good. I'd take songwriting any day over covering other's work. Heck play for yourself-if others like it great but if not, so what , most people have bad musical taste anyway. The other thing you might like is a looper pedal to play leads over-that is pretty fun too.
     

  13. backporchmusic

    backporchmusic Friend of Leo's

    Nov 28, 2006
    USA
    You keep doing because generally you get better at it if you do. At the same time, don't bother with approval to tell you if what you do is good. If you're not selling it, that doesn't matter.

    Do it for yourself, as an exercise and something that makes you happy. Your issue seems to be that you need other's approval to think it's of value. F*#k 'em. Make your motive pure, the happiness and satisfaction will follow.
     
    El Tele Lobo and Strum und Twang like this.

  14. heltershelton

    heltershelton Tele-Afflicted

    Sep 14, 2016
    not houston
    sometimes i want to get rid of pretty much everything i own and give everything up. not just music, but everything, including people.
    id like to go to either the mountains somewhere or a deserted tropical island and live by myself till the day i die.
     

  15. charlie chitlin

    charlie chitlin Doctor of Teleocity Silver Supporter

    Age:
    56
    Mar 17, 2003
    Spring City, Pa
    Would you say this to an actor?
    You can't get an audience?
    Make your motive pure.
    Just stay home and act in your bedroom for the PURE unselfish enjoyment of it.
     
    KyAnne likes this.

  16. Rbriggs82

    Rbriggs82 TDPRI Member

    31
    Jan 5, 2016
    Summerville, SC
    I'm terrible and only play for myself. I can't ever imagine playing for others. Friends ask and i decline, just don't have the confidence to do it. Never thought about throwing in the towel I just keep plugging away hoping that one day I'll have the confidence to share.

    I'd just take a little break if I were you, but I wouldn't go selling everything just yet.
     
    Last edited: Jan 3, 2018
    KyAnne and chiefline like this.

  17. popthree

    popthree Poster Extraordinaire

    as a song writer, i feel a need to share my work with others. i have a hope that it will be well received. that's kind of the point. i am very unfulfilled in this endeavor. perhaps if you are a gunslinger guitarist, and not creating original music, pouring your deepest thoughts and personality into lyrical content, it is not the same. i don't know. i have been fighting this type of thinking for a very long time. i have no idea what to do about it. it's hard to give up on something i love, but at the same time, its breaking my heart either way.
     
    Tommy Biggs likes this.

  18. RodeoTex

    RodeoTex Poster Extraordinaire

    Sep 14, 2005
    Nueces Strip
    I understand completely Pop. It is very human to seek approval. Nothing wrong with that, just human nature.
    No one produces art just to fulfill their own pleasure alone.
    Everyone is looking for approval.

    If no one is looking/listening/commenting, then why bother?
    I've been thinking about this myself too lately.
    (I'm 57 and still waiting for the talent to show up)
     
    popthree likes this.

  19. backporchmusic

    backporchmusic Friend of Leo's

    Nov 28, 2006
    USA

    Actors need an audience. That's the whole game. Illusion. Music is very different. If you need an audience, that's something you're bringing to it. It in no way NEEDS to be that way.
     

  20. christhee68

    christhee68 Friend of Leo's

    Aug 1, 2011
    south carolina
    There’s a band from North Carolina, American Aquarium. They slogged it out for years playing crappy places. Finally they gave up and decided to do one last album and tour and then get real jobs.

    The album was about how they tried their hardest but it didn’t work out and they were moving on.

    It was a big hit. Now they’ve “made it” and things are going great. They used that angst and sense of failure as a source for some great new songs.
    I’m sure I don’t have the whole story straight but you can google them and see what I’m talking about.
     

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