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Blasphemy? "Yes, cargo shorts really are that bad — here's what you should wear instead"

Discussion in 'Bad Dog Cafe' started by jackinjax, May 13, 2017.

  1. jackinjax

    jackinjax Tele-Afflicted

    Sep 11, 2016
    Jacksonville
    I don't have a single pair of cargo shorts and haven't worn them since the early '90s, and that was only when I got into offshore fishing. I don't pass judgement on another man's tastes in apparel since I still frequently wear my "loose fit" Levis 505 jeans I bought in the late'80s. I mean, they're comfortable!
    I found this article this morning from "Business Insider" that dares to suggest, "Why no man should wear cargo shorts".
    Who do these people think they are?


    http://www.businessinsider.com/why-no-man-should-wear-cargo-shorts-2017-5
     
  2. Jupiter

    Jupiter Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Jun 22, 2010
    Osaka, Japan
    That there was the douchiest article I read all day--and I spent the whole day on the Internet.

    I prolly shouldn't have admitted that...
     
  3. Manual Slim

    Manual Slim Tele-Meister

    152
    Mar 21, 2017
    Baltimore
    Hogwash. Not everyone cares about creating the perfect silhouette. If your butthole is covered you're in compliance with the only important fashion guideline.
     
    PapaBeef, ftbtx, waparker4 and 8 others like this.
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  5. Sparky2

    Sparky2 Tele-Meister

    Age:
    57
    239
    Apr 15, 2017
    Harvest, Alabama
    I like to wear my read leather shorts really short, but loose enough at the waist that I get to wear my festive suspenders.

    I slept in the same bed with my mom until almost high school.
    It's complicated, I guess that's what I'm saying.

    :oops:

    [​IMG]
     
  6. goonie

    goonie Friend of Leo's

    Dec 20, 2011
    Australia
    This resonated with me -

    The first issue: A gentleman does not wear shorts that cover the knees.

    I'm like that. Just don't feel right in shorts that cover my knees.
     
    middy and jackinjax like this.
  7. Tremade

    Tremade Tele-Holic

    588
    Jan 30, 2016
    Sthlm, Sweden
    Some people wear pants/shorts that doesn't cover their butts either...
     
    Alamo, TigerG and jackinjax like this.
  8. Obsessed

    Obsessed Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Nov 21, 2012
    Montana
    I live in cargo shorts half the year (non snow season, although it is snowing here a bit this morning:lol:), but none of mine cover the knees. He kind of dismisses that. So, the concrete jungle slimeball millennial that wrote that article probably spends his free time as a dark room, video games loser instead of enjoying nature, hiking, fly fishing and white water kayaking ... or jammin' his guitar with buddies (that he wish he had).

    BTW, did you noticed the bumched shrits? Definitely de rigueur with cargo shorts.
     
    PapaBeef, headly21, Andy B and 2 others like this.
  9. Manual Slim

    Manual Slim Tele-Meister

    152
    Mar 21, 2017
    Baltimore
    Sure, but I rarely see exposed anuses and when I do I consider the bearer to be out of compliance.
     
    Greenmachine likes this.
  10. Brad Pittiful

    Brad Pittiful Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    Dec 22, 2008
    Philly Burbs
    i never listen to critics...theyre too critical
     
    Teleterr and src9000 like this.
  11. blowtorch

    blowtorch Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    May 2, 2003
    Wisco
    Shorts for guys should really only for the beach, running/working out, or doing lawnwork when it's hot out.

    Unless you're Angus Young. (HINT-you are not Angus Young)
     
  12. Controller

    Controller Friend of Leo's

    Jun 11, 2010
    Montana
    No pockets? Yes, as a matter of fact I do build things (poorly) and I put tape measure, screws, lint, guitar picks, partly eaten Cliff bar, billfold, checkbook, phone and other surprises and I don't need a bag for all that stuff.

    The guy in the "chino shorts" has shaved legs. Why wear shorts if you have those puny pasty sticks coming out of them? OK, full disclosure, my legs are blindingly white!

    And for those who are keeping score, Business Insider recommends $1000 men's dress shoes. Thousand dollar guitar I can see, shoes? I don't think so.
     
  13. Tremade

    Tremade Tele-Holic

    588
    Jan 30, 2016
    Sthlm, Sweden
    Well, you wouldn't see their anuses even if they totally removed the pants/shorts.
     
  14. Manual Slim

    Manual Slim Tele-Meister

    152
    Mar 21, 2017
    Baltimore
    People do bend over, of course.
     
  15. Michael A.

    Michael A. Tele-Holic Ad Free Member

    681
    Jan 12, 2013
    Virginia Beach, VA

    Wow, had not seen that image since the movie came out. The producers must have had to offer Sean an extra percentage to agree to wear that getup!
     
  16. Tremade

    Tremade Tele-Holic

    588
    Jan 30, 2016
    Sthlm, Sweden
    Through the underpants? Ahh wait a minute, you're the comando type of guy!
     
    Last edited: May 13, 2017
    Manual Slim likes this.
  17. Piggy Stu

    Piggy Stu Tele-Holic

    Age:
    38
    611
    Feb 26, 2017
    Manchester UK
    You don't know the lives we lead, what we see and don't see - whatever happened to walking a mile in another man's moccasins before judging his world?

    You sound like a person who has never accidentally navigated into a German nudist beach for retirees

    If you had you could never say this, or look with innocence upon a sandcastle

    Also: isn't covering the 'third eye' priority 2, after concealment of your baby-gravy dispenser? (Unsure of polite term that doesn't get converted to a stream of asterixes)
     
    schnulli likes this.
  18. Manual Slim

    Manual Slim Tele-Meister

    152
    Mar 21, 2017
    Baltimore
    Eh. Different preferences regarding exposed anatomy are to be expected.
     
  19. elmoscafeo

    elmoscafeo Tele-Holic

    Age:
    56
    968
    Jun 29, 2012
    Chicago Suburbs
  20. Toto'sDad

    Toto'sDad Telefied Ad Free Member

    Jun 21, 2011
    Bakersfield
    No secret how I feel about cargoes I wear 'em every day. IF, I was gonna listen to someone's advice about fashion (which I'm not) it certainly would have to come from someone who doesn't sit down to pee, it's obvious from his choice in shorts Mr. Article Writer does just that.
     
  21. LutherBurger

    LutherBurger Tele-Afflicted

    Oct 29, 2013
    NYC
    OMG! Mah silhouette is unbalanced!

    Business Insider, please help meh!
     
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