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Band drama

Discussion in 'Band Wagon' started by poiureza, Jan 23, 2013.

  1. poiureza

    poiureza Tele-Holic

    Apr 19, 2012
    I love these threads, you're always in for a good read.
    But this time it's my turn ... not so fun

    I play keys in a Pink Floyd cover band and I absolutely LOVE playing PF songs.
    I can't think of any other cover I would rather do.
    Seriously !!
    We are a strong band and our following is growing, slowy but steadily.

    I found this small gig (we are currently having a REALLY hard time finding gigs) and had to change the schedule several times because of the drummer while he was initially fine when I asked. I sure look like a tool towards the venue owner.
    Instead of keeping a low profile when I made the point, the drummer yelled back pretty ugly. I mean really ugly.

    I've pretty much had enough of this ongoing BS.
    I'm pulling this band alone and I keep getting frustrated.
    Sometimes I think I deserve better.

    I called the venue yesterday, cancelled the gig and looked for musician ads on the web.

    It's pretty easy for me to find a spot in a band. I play keys, guitar and I can somewhat sing. After less than an hour searching I'm now wanted in 3 bands. Among those, that INXS cover looks good. They are locally known musicians. I'm not, and nobody in the PF band is. I think they could pull me up musically speaking (nothing sure of course, I haven't met them yet).

    Our drummer apologized today for being a dork (well sort of, he never really apologizes). Until next time ...
    Being the mellow guy I am, I'm torn now of course. But still angry/frustrated.

    So I would be about to quit a band that I love being in, for something less appealing.
    Not sure that's a smart move for the hobby musician I am.
    Putting everything in balance, it keeps moving up and down ...

  2. CountryVoodoo

    CountryVoodoo Tele-Meister

    Oct 27, 2012
    I have no clue how to say youf user name bud. But I say send the drummer to the dungeon! Or atleast replace him

  3. GigsbyBoyUK

    GigsbyBoyUK Friend of Leo's

    Apr 30, 2008
    Peterborough, UK
    You need to establish ground rules with the band. Things like, if the band all commit to a gig then they stick to that date unless there is a genuine emergency. If the band isn't willing to agree to that rule, it is time to move on.

  4. poiureza

    poiureza Tele-Holic

    Apr 19, 2012
    Username is just a backwards row on my azerty keyboard.
    VERY easy to type :D

    Replacing the drummer is not an option

  5. Big_Bend

    Big_Bend Poster Extraordinaire

    Feb 19, 2010
    Houston, TX

    :eek: What, there are no other drummers in Belgium? Well if thats the case then it sounds like you're screwed. Good luck getting gigs in the future with this jerk playing the drums and ruining your good opportunities.

  6. muudcat

    muudcat Tele-Holic

    Jan 3, 2010
    Fountain City, Wi
    Sometimes people get defensive when you hit on something they just can't accept in themselves. To me a commitment to do a gig is a done deal. Now I'm not a PF fan, INXS I dig, but that's just me. You said it was hard to get gigs, that says a lot. Personally I'd think seriously about the offer for the INXS band, especially if the other players are more pro like. That's a good thing and might challenge you musically. If you stay put and the drummer does this again,( starts a pattern of behavior) you're wasting your time with him.

  7. Space Pickle

    Space Pickle Tele-Meister

    Jan 23, 2010
    You could always get a sub.

  8. mrboson

    mrboson Tele-Afflicted

    Aug 9, 2011
    Brookings, OR
    This sounds like a win. I wouldn't let this one pass by, if it was me. Anyway, any reason why you can't do both at the same time for a while? Or bring some Floyd to the INXS cover band...

  9. stratomite

    stratomite Tele-Meister

    Oct 10, 2007
    Exactly right! If your drummer is the reason you are constantly calling to cancel or reschedule gigs your days in this band are numbered anyway. To keep him around is just delaying the inevitable.

  10. Zillinois

    Zillinois Friend of Leo's

    Feb 25, 2009
    Move on, it's just music. an INXS tribute band sounds like a blast.

  11. bender66

    bender66 Friend of Leo's

    Jan 18, 2010
    on my bike
    It sounds like the drummer has already been repeating the pattern. Although you were having fun, he sounds dead set against you having your fun. Move along. The INXS band won't be your last either.

  12. String Tree

    String Tree Doctor of Teleocity

    Dec 8, 2010
    Up North

    Life is short.
    Play the music you want to play with the people who want to play it.

    Can't push a River, gotta go with the Flow.

    Playing with people who raise you Blood Pressure are not worth it.
    Sometimes, saving a friendship means not playing Music together anymore.

  13. poiureza

    poiureza Tele-Holic

    Apr 19, 2012
    I always appreciate your comments and opinions ST.

    I dived into the INXS material last night. I dig (to some extend) but I'm not nearly fan enough to play in a tribute band.

    This is so very true

    My current options are :
    - keep playing music I like with people who love to play this stuff too but who are jerks (it's not only the drummer, the others too are there for the fun but not for the work - I do ALL the work)
    - playing music I don't much like with people who seem to be more pro

    Looks like I'll be playing alone in my basement soon ...

    PS : On a funny note, yesterday a guy I played with some years ago (we're still friends) called back and asked me I was in for a band revival.
    Funny, but no I'm not in. I never look back

  14. MrTwang

    MrTwang Friend of Leo's

    Feb 9, 2009
    London, England
    I think I see where you went wrong. If you're in a PF tribute band, surely the bass player is supposed to be the pain in the butt?

  15. Norton72

    Norton72 Tele-Afflicted

    Jan 14, 2011
    Burton, Texas

  16. Tle4

    Tle4 Tele-Afflicted

    Dec 28, 2010
    Warrington, Pa. USA
    If you get along with everyone else in the band...I would look for a good back up drummer. That way you dont have to cancel gigs or worry about your current drummer. If the current drummer keeps acting up, maybe everyone else will want to use the backup drummer full time. The backup drummer will show your current drummer that he is replaceable....

    The hardest part of being in a band is finding a group of guys that all get along or without egos. I would rather play with less experienced players if we all get along. I am surprised that it is the drummer though, it is usually the singer

  17. poiureza

    poiureza Tele-Holic

    Apr 19, 2012
    Haha :D

    Oddly enough, our bass player is the wisest guy of the bunch.
    A nice dude but don't ask him anything other than to play his bass.

  18. poiureza

    poiureza Tele-Holic

    Apr 19, 2012
    We all get along with each other pretty well most of the time.

    I think that this drummer-gig-cancel thingy was merely the last straw that broke the camel's back and got me tilted.
    As I said before, I carry the whole band on my shoulders but I was fine with that for years. They're all youngsters in the band (late 20's, early 30's) besides the bass player and I find they act more and more like spoiled kids now (drummer being the worst).

    Oh and the drummer is the guitarist's brother. They go hand in hand.
    If the drummer AND guitarist leave, might as well scrape the whole thing.

  19. blowtorch

    blowtorch Doctor of Teleocity Ad Free Member

    May 2, 2003
    it's always the drummer...

  20. paul74

    paul74 Tele-Meister

    Jan 17, 2012
    Chesterfield, UK
    Don't know about where you live but near me bassists and keyboard players are much harder to find than guitarists and drummers.

    Speak to the guitarist about his brother, he may be just as tired as you. If the drummer can't sort his attitude find another drummer. If the guitarist then decides to leave place an advert saying "lead guitarist required for PF tribute band", lots of players would jump at playing Gilmour every gig.

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