I wish I could play in front of people! :(

[wmsimpson]

There's an open mic the first Friday of the month at the local grange, and my G.F. has been challenging me to play. I should have known better. I've never been able to perform solo in front of people. I always tense up and lose focus. I thought maybe I could psych myself up this time, be confident and just let the music flow as if I was playing all alone. Wrong. I stunk the place up pretty bad. I wonder if I have attention deficit disorder or something... I lose focus so easy. Could medication be the answer?

[greggorypeccary]

Just sounds like nerves to me.

But I have no way of relating to where you are at your age, I started playing in front of people in my teens.

BTW - after a look at your videos, playing ability is definitely not the problem!

[Tim Armstrong]

If you can play and sing a song okay when you're alone, it isn't an ADD issue.

My suggestion is to desensitize yourself by playing first to just your girlfriend, then perhaps her and another friend, and then a few more folks. I found that any stage fright I had tended to go away with repetition. Do that a few times and work on keeping your focus on the microphone in front of you rather than the people on the other side of the mic, and I suspect you'll be just fine!

Tim

[piece of ash]

Yes... ability is NO issue here. I'm dead serious here... do some busking. Just go sit on corner or a park bench and play. Or a coffee shop... go someplace where the focus is not entirely on you... that will get get you past the "nerves thing". Any coffee shop with half a brain would slip you free java and be GLAD to have you play.

[Budda]

Maybe start going to a local jam session? Learn the Rhythm parts to 2 or 3 of the more commonly played tunes there, and then go back again, and ask if you can "back someone up" when they play. Get used to being onstage, just not in the center of all of the attention. This can help you to ease into it all.

[zatoichi]

I'm sure you've practiced your guitar plenty...but have you practiced playing in front of others? Sounds like not. Why expect to be good at that if you haven't practiced that?

Get some friends to listen to you play. Have one of them introduce you. Pretend it's an actual gig, say hi, give 'em a tune and a joke, and another tune. You're gonna be as tense as you were the first time you took your driving test, so PLAN FOR IT.

Think it through: of all the things that are NOT rocket science, playing music and singing are as old as humanity, and as universal as death. Doctorate not required.

Breathe. Stretch, scratch, breathe, play, smile, sing, breathe, stretch, smile. Practice *these* things. Pick 5 songs to perform beforehand, and practice remembering which they are. Then, invite THOSE SAME FRIENDS to your next open-mic. You've practiced playing for them, so just expand the meaning of "them".

First time I played in front of a bunch o' folks, I was so nervous my hands and my voice and my knees all shook like crazy...but I powered through, figuring that the crowd wanted me to be good. I made it. You will too, if you just do it.

Oh, and BREATHE.

[Jonny_Quest]

Have you thought of offering lessons?

After having many sessions with single and small groups of students in a positive, relaxed, structured setting where you're largely 'in control', it may change your mindset and any other issues with playing in front of larger groups.

Plus, you'll even get paid for it,...if you choose to.

[Jack S]

Don't let it get you down. It was your first attempt, right? Don't let self-consciousness prevent you from going again and again. I promise it gets easier once you get over the initial idea that people are judging you. You just be upfront and say, this is my second time ever so I may make a few mistakes, and you will be amazed at how encouraging most audiences will be. They want you to see you do well. Everyone screws up sometimes, even really big stars, so go knowing it could be bad again, and that is okay. It is an open mic so no one will be expecting their money back for the show.

Good luck.

[roscoestring]

While working at a local amusement park I was once asked to perform a song that I had written just before LeAnn Womack was to perform. I did the song and had no problem. I had to leave immediately afterwards because I was due at a church to perform. There were 14,000 people in attendance at the amusement park. I pulled it off with no problems and was never nervous - well, maybe a little when LeAnn told me to "Go knock 'em dead". I got to the church and performed before a group of folks that I could count on my fingers. Less than 10. My knees shook the entire time.

It's nerves guy. Stop thinking so much. Forget the people are there and just sing. When in front of a group I pick out the one soul that looks like they are enjoying themselves the most and sing to them. I forget that everyone else is there. It works!

[JeradP]

Damn, I wish I could play like YOU.

[garytelecastor]

I was in a warm-up band for a very famous singer/songwriter. One of my heroes.
He was getting ready to go on while we were tearing our gear out of the way.
I walked up to him and said something to the effect "this must be like falling off a bike for you". There was at least 10K people in the arena. He just looked at me and smiled,
He stuck out his hand to shake mine and his hand was sweating. He looked at me and said "it never gets easy".

There isn't a player on the planet that doesn't experience nerves, and those who say they don't are just lying.
Standing and either performing or speaking in front of a crowd is one of the top anxiety producing behaviors.
But everyone has nailed it, especially Tim. You just need to get some exposure to the whole performance thing. Then you'll soon begin to replace thoughts about the crowd and begin thinking about what you are playing.

[Jack S]

I listened to your Youtube channel and you are very good. Don't be afraid to do it again. People will definitely benefit from hearing you play.

[praisebass]

Originally Posted by wmsimpson

Could medication be the answer?

Possibly, as temporary solution. Busking is a great idea. No medication is better than medication. Try the other advice you get here. However, if out continues to be a problem, you might talk to your doctor about a mild beta blocker or anti anxiety medication. I have on occasion had to take small dose of ativan to make it through an especially emotional situation such as playing a funeral for a 7 year old girl. Its definitely not a long term solution. You also might try a mild homeopathic calming aid although I should approach rhode with caution as well.

[metallicsponge]

OP is not just good, he's terrific. Very smooth and keeps a steady bass.

Its possible that when busking you can get lazy and lose focus. It almost becomes like practice. If it were me, I would just forget open mics and send out your youtube clips to coffee shops and play a 1 or 2 hour set for free (coffee). That way you have time to get in the groove. Open mics can be stressful because its kind of a competition, and you only get 1 or 2 songs to show your stuff.

Since you aren't charging money, in the unlikely case that you do "stink it up", it will be a learning experience. Then start making money of your wicked guitar skills :)

[Joe-Bob]

It gets easier the more you do it. Instead of playing alone, play with other people. Get together with a group of people who jam informally every week. Public performance and group playing are skills that we need to work on, just like the other skills we need as a musician.

[Colt W. Knight]

Originally Posted by wmsimpson

There's an open mic the first Friday of the month at the local grange, and my G.F. has been challenging me to play. I should have known better. I've never been able to perform solo in front of people. I always tense up and lose focus. I thought maybe I could psych myself up this time, be confident and just let the music flow as if I was playing all alone. Wrong. I stunk the place up pretty bad. I wonder if I have attention deficit disorder or something... I lose focus so easy. Could medication be the answer?

If by medication you mean bourbon, yes.

Actually, there are certain type of beta blockers that work to calm nerves. I have to take them for my blood pressure and hand tremors. When I have to give a presentation(for a grade) I pop a few extra to calm the nerves. I don't mind public speaking or singing/playing for folks, but when you have to do it for a grade, my calm collectiveness goes to hell.

[SatelliteOrders]

Let me tell you about the first time I played in front of others. It was a campus open mic, and one of my songs was "Friend of the Devil", and as soon as I started, I could not recall a single word.

I had the fear. It was bad. But nobody threw anything. Looking and feeling foolish is the worst that can happen, and it isn't as bad as you can build it up to be.

[Larry F]

You are playing some very intricate stuff in your videos. One of the hardest things for me is to play the melody with the pinky, while the other fingers are forming chord beneath. It is very hard to make the pinky sound smooth and controlled. For me, that would be a danger area when playing under pressure. I would build my set, no matter how long, with easier actions of the hands and fingers first, then building to more dangerous stuff.

I have dealt with speaking and performing in front of people almost every day since I was in junior high. Sometimes I feel great and sometimes I feel like a hot towel has been draped over my head and I realize I am alone with nothing to show for myself. It is sometimes a random thing that I still get. I hate it, too. Just hate it, as I feel I have not made any progress in my life's calling for 40 years. Sticky hands, jitters, and I say random things and misunderstand what people are saying. It can get pretty bad. On the other hand, I have sat onstage while being introduced for a talk. Sitting there, I can sometimes think: I have no idea how I will begin this. But I am a god right now, and what I say will be funny, smart, and live-changing for someone. So, it's a crapshoot.

[Tonemaster]

Play with other musicians. That will help loads.

T.

[flag72]

to you Sir I take off my hat and say awsome,you should play in a band you are that good.you should start playing with some friends and work your way into bigger groupe you have so much talent.I love you electric guitar solo also you are a very good player keep it up Bill...

wish I could play with you I could learn so much