Worst Faux Pas By You Or Your Band

[refin]

Oh boy.........this should be funny.
What's the worst goof up made live by you or your band while performing?
I have a few,but I want to hear your stories.

[Tim Armstrong]

I think it was a gig at the University of Maryland in 1986, three bands, hardly any PA system, absolutely no monitors, band playing way too loud, me trying to sing and play a fretless bass....

shudder!

Tim

[swooda]

Man there's been so many. One really sticks out in my mind. Back in the 80's I was playing with Freddy Fender. We were doing a show up in Pennsylvania at some motor speedway. Must of been about 10,000 people there. Anyway his last song was always his big hit Wasted Days and Wasted Nights. The intro was me playing a B aug arpeggio in the second position, you know B, E flat, G, B. Well I was a half step high. Out pops a great big C maj7. When I did, it was like a lightning bolt went through me. In my panic I played it again. Freddy looks over at me and over the mic says "Stevie that's not right". I finally realized what I had done and played the B aug. Freddy over the mic goes "that's it". I swear I felt like I was one foot tall. The bass player nearly fell off the stage laughing.

By the way Refin I listened to your stuff on soundclick. That's some sweet playin bro.

[guit145]

Cut myself shaving before a new years gig (dressed in a cowboy tux). Bled like a stuck hog for 2 hours. Had to wipe the blood off my neck between every song. Floor was filled with bloody paper towels. Ruined the shirt needless to say.

Fell on my face one time running around on stage. No damage to guitar or its operator.

Of course I've had the occational start in the wrong key, space on the next chord, sing the same verse 3 times (did that this weekend) etc. That stuff is always worse when you're playing bass...

[refin]

Yipes---some sidesplitters here!

One time I was in a 4 piece band,and we had 3 songlists on stage,written pretty big with a marker.The drummer gives a 4 count,and 2 of us started playing one song,and the other 2 another song! Since both songs were similiar in tempo,it was hard to tell.What a laugh,almost ruined the night.

Swooda,thanks for listening and you kind words....your story left me laughing and feeling your pain.There's no backline big enough to hide behind!
My biggest goofs have always been in church or playing at weddings.

[51mike]

Hey refin,
Watch out for the big blow coming your way.
Take care and be safe man!

[refin]

Thanks,51mike....I think it is gonna miss us,but I'll keep my eyes open.


We were playing in an Air Force hanger one time on a flatbed---our drummer leaned back too far and fell off.Could've killed him,but he was okay.We laughed till tear ducts were dry.

[Reno Sepulveda]

I was playing in Church I'd just joined this church but a bunch of people there knew me from "before" word was out that I was a musician. I get up there with my old Alvarez I kick off Dolly's Coat Of Many Colors. I got all the way to "There were rags of many colors and all of them were small" then my mind went blank and I just stood there like a freaking deer in the headlights strumming a D chord. For the life of me I couldn't remember any of the words so I apologized and sat down. Afterwords all these little old baptist ladies (God bless every last one of them) came up and hugged me saying "it's OK honey that song chokes me up everytime too."

[woodman]

in the late '60s, i had a psychedelic garage band in San Fran called Blind, Crippled & Crazy that played wherever we could (parties, picnics, jam night at the Fillmore). we finally got a paying gig in Rodeo, Calif., and we were stoked, it meant we'd finally become pro's.

we went in there guns a-blazin, playing our change-the-world, canyons-of-your-mind original stuff, and every song was met with sullen silence. we couldn't figure it out, cuz folks in the city really grooved to it. (we had failed to take into consideration that although Rodeo was only 25 miles from SF, it was largely a farming town free of freaks.)

finally an old boy in a cowboy hat came up to the stage and calls me over and says, "Hey bud, how bout turning down so's we can drink some beer?"

That pretty much cut our water off to a drip. the only song we knew that they liked was "Crying Time," and we played it every other song for the rest of the night.

my first crushing blow as a bandleader/songwriter! even more embarrasing than the time i was table-walking and the table fell apart and i fell on my a$$.

[g-Paul]

Quote: We were playing in an Air Force hanger one time on a flatbed---our drummer leaned back too far and fell off.Could've killed him,but he was okay.We laughed till tear ducts were dry.

We had a similar one: playing in a bar one night, the drummer's stool broke and collapsed under him in the middle of a song. We had no idea what was happening - the drums just dropped out of the song. Turned around and he was lying on his back kicking pathetically at the bass drum - we just started killing ourselves laughing! A guy sitting at a table in front ran up with a chair for him, he got back up, and we just kept going.

[ddewerd]

Oh yeah, way too many to count - missed riffs, wrong words, band starting at wrong tempo, band playing 2 different songs at the same time...

Probably my most embarrasing for me was back in the early 80's, playing a college pep rally thingy outside on the quad. Huge PA system, rockin' the house. Well, we had this female keyboard player. She could play and sing well, but had absolutely no stage presence. So she's trying to banter with the crowd and is saying the most stupid, innane stuff. So after a while, I've about had it. She's pre-empting all the other guys in the band and I'm thinking that here we are, playing our asses off and then she's ruining it with with her stupid comments.

So finally I've had enough, and the next time she blurts something out, my frustration got the best of me and I hollered out (and too close to the mic) "Laura will you just shut the fsck up"

I got a somewhat strange reaction from the crowd, and we finished out the night. I was talking with our sound guy afterwards and he says, man was that funny. After I heard Laura saying all that stupid stuff, I shut her off in the main speakers in between songs, but she was still on in the monitors. So the crowd never heard all this crap she was saying, but they sure did hear me

Cheers,
Doug

[guitrr]

I used to play with a drummer who was obsessive about his kit, one of those clear plastic Ludwig sets, a'la John Bonham. He would polish those things all the time, and they gleamed like brand new, even though they were 20 years old.

One night on a bar gig our bass player knocked a nearly full pitcher of beer off his stack, and it fell right onto the drummer's fan. We heard a crash, then turned to see the drummer and kit engulfed in a tidal wave of beer spray and glass fragments. The shock of it all nearly knocked him off his throne. I don't know how in the world we kept playing, because the entire band was laughing hysterically! To this day, it's still one of the funniest memories of my life!

Kane

[furrfurrfurr]

great post.

[freshmattyp]

I jumped off the drum riser, landed funny, and fell straight on my butt. I spent the rest of the gig in a chair with my leg elevated. 2 weeks later I had knee srugery for a shredded meniscus.

Don't let anybody tell you rock and roll isn't dangerous. :D

[dr_twangenstein]

Didn't happen to me, but the funniest I ever saw was back in college. I used to jam with some guys and we'd do a lot of Dead/Floyd/Band covers that sort of thing. Anyway, this dude, Pat used to jam on sax with us sometimes, and one of the singers went over to dance with him Bruce/Clarence style during a song. He tripped over a cable and spilled a full cup of beer right into the bell of his sax. The horn made a sound like a drowning goose and we all just stopped playing and fell to the floor laughing. Pat was pissed.

As for me. I love it when I screw up. I just laugh it off and the crowd seems to think it's endearing.

[harry the filter]

We were doing a show one night in Knoxville before 10's of people, when for dramatic effect, I swung my LP Standard down and to the right to grab the microphone, thinking that my trusty straplocks would keep it hanging on my shoulder. The sound it made as it bounced across the stage and into my amplifier was much louder than I expected. Although I wasn't wearing shiny crotchless pants or sporting a blue mullet, at that moment I felt like the biggest poser on the planet.

[Cam]

With a singer that will remain anonymous in an era that wont be named, the singer introduces a politician and his wife at the gig:
Here is our MLA Mr X and his UGLY wife Mrs. X. The singer meant to say lovely wife....LOL not a musical glitch but one none theless. The rest of the band was biting their cheeks. That was quite a wess up of mords indeed.
The saving grace is the audience and the rest of the folks evidently heard "lovely" as that was what was expected in their brain.

[Nazman]

Last Friday my band played gig her at a club in Dallas (O'Rileys).During one song we tune down to drop D ..After the song I forgot to tune back up to reg tuning..about three songs later I figure out why the guitar player is playing the wrong chords..It dawned on me like a bad case of the shi%s that it was me and Iwas still detuned. I had to avoid the top string or play 2 frets higher until the song was over..The band and people I knew in the audience never noticed it..But , I felt like a real dumb sh%t.

[beachkos]

We were playing at a wedding reception on Long Island at one of those large catering hall/wedding mill places. The bride and groom were "older" as this was the 2nd time around for both, and a majority of their 250+ guests were mostly "baby boomers". It was one of those rare wedding receptions where the crowd was more like the local bar crowd than a "wedding" crowd, and we as a band were having as much fun as they were. About 3 hours into the reception, the crowd was way "loose", the drinks flowing, and the crowd up and dancing to everything. Inevitably, we started taking requests ( the Bride and Groom's song list be damned) and it wasn't long before they were yelling out "Louie,Louie" - we cranked it up and I launched into the lead vocals doing the "perceived" lyrics ( you know the verse - ala Belushi- Animal House) not the "AM" radio lyrics or the original Richard Berry lyrics. Most of the crowd loved it, but a few people were a little perplexed, possibly even shocked, by what they thought they heard, especially the minister who officiated at the wedding and who just happened to be sitting at one of the front tables near the band with most of the grand parents.Had I been more aware of the mixed crowd, and not having such a good time myself (aka Absolut on the rocks), I certainly would have done the "AM" version. After the set, the minister came over to me, told me he had always liked the song, but until that night, never really knew what the "real" lyrics were. His question was one I'll always remember - "Did I hear what I think I heard ? " I just smiled, never answered his question, and he smiled back, knowingly.

[mark norwine]

I recall a gig with a previous band.....

We were in a bar, but set up behind a small, waist-high retaining wall that served to separate a sitting / eating area from the standing area of the bar.

Our idiot singer thought it would be fun to climb up on this little wall and "dance". My recollection is that the song / timing / crowd was 100% appropriate for this kind of shenanigan, and our idiot singer was just the kind of knucklehead who could pull it off without seeming weird about it.

So he climbs up, starts dancing, singing……and takes a few steps…and puts his head right into the blade of a ceiling fan! I suppose it could have been a tragic situation, but it was funny as funny gets! We rolled on the floor laughing, unable to continue playing. He’s bleeding, we’re roaring, the crowd is shocked that we don’t seem to care about the well-being of our idiot singer….oh, it was a fine, fine moment, indeed!

[refin]

Oh man,I'm about to wet myself......these are some funny stories!

[stephent2]

OK, I used to do "agency" gigs, weddings, xmas parties, conventions. Well paid jobs I hated. Anyway.

One year we played a Xmas party for a large group of professional women, actually a established group of lesbian women here in Atlanta.

The bonehead singer would grab the mic and say "Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen" every chance he got. We'd remind him where we were and who we were playing for but old habits you know.

No one called us on it but we never were asked back either.

[OceanBoy]

Picture this.

Local rock band has gig out of town. Singer doesn't know who the band is playing for, shows up at gig 10 minutes late. The gig is in a high school theatre where of course, they have plays as well. Band launches into first song which is high energy rockin tune. Singer spies female mannequin at side of stage. End of song - hollywood ending - singer grabs mannequin and wildly thrashes mannequin around. End of song - complete silence. Crowd [full house] is staring at singer in complete disgust.

Who was the gig for?

Hestia House benefit for battered women.

[mark norwine]

OUCH!!!!!!!

[vic108]

I don't know about battered women but I love battered dipped shrimp!