My neighbor's a psycho-jerk....

[CancerLeoCam]

I was watching as many, the SC ND game and saw SC going down. Knowing that many in the neighborhood are Trojan fans (SC lic. plates and the like) I hooted and hollered for ND. My neighbor gets all psychotic and starts yelling SC, SC, SC! when SC scored in the 4th. I came right back when ND made their drive with 2 minutes to go with my yahoo! yeahs!. SC came back with the Leinart miracle and he goes even louder SC, SC ,SC!


Now, mind you, my neighbor NEVER talks about football. But now he does. If he had a problem wiht the noise he should have walked on over and knocked on the door. I would have toned it down. Now seeing he wants to go jihad (psycho) it just caps many things I have been feeling about them since we moved in....psycho jerks. It's a game buddy. You're supposed to hoot and holler.


In addition, the guy has a definite compulsion to slam doors around as he's doing at this very minute. He always acts like he's mr. cool to my wife and is always icey with me. His wife on the other hand is nice to me but a jerk to my wife. The are both real uppity, in their late 40's early fifties and snooty and act like their you-know-what doesn't stink.


We live in a townhome and are separated by a common wall and it really feels like glamorized apartment living. Whether his wife doesn't treat him well or it's a function of work the guy definitely has some issues. I'm working in the garage and the guy comes out and starts slamming doors, goes back in the house for a few seconds, comes back in the garage, does it again, goes back in the house-repeat. This repeats for more times than I would like to recall.

I mean when we moved here two years ago they NEVER came over to welcome us to the neighborhood or say hello-it just kinda happened. The neighbors on the other side of us are hella cool and are super mellow around our age -middle aged. Aside from the neighbors using the guest parking out here as an extra garage I don't have many complaints. However, these guys are just the most standoffish bunch. I talked to the wife today and we are gonna discuss a move as I think it's time. Any ideas or comments are welcomed. This is a drag.

[PraiseCaster]

..... this seems to be indicitive of living out here in California. I'm kinda outgoing, and gregarious, and I like to talk to people, yet i notice a lot of the aloofness of fellow Californians, and it doesnt seem to matter there background.

Only a couple options I can think of:

1) Try to get to know em a little better. you'll have to have a strong anti-gag reflex. But maybe if you get beyond the walls between the two of you, it might get better (I said might, as in maybe, maybe not).

But that may not be an option if he is mental (dont put yourself in his line of fire!!!!)

2) call the police and complain when it gets past 8:00pm and he is getting loud, but, I would only do this if you share walls with him, and he also shares walls with others in the complex. If its only you two sharin walls, DONT DO IT!

3) Ignore it. I know that seems hard, especially since he seems to be tryin so hard to put off an air of arrogance, but, some times being the bigger and better man, and saying to yourself, 'He only slams some doors some times, and acts like a yahoo. He doesnt call me names, threaten me, my wife or kids, or my dog, so he really isnt hurting me, he's just a bit of a minor irritant.' Then once you put it in that perspective, it wont gnaw at you as much. you took the high road, ther is peace in your house, and your wifey will think you are so cool!

Personally, I'd pick number three for now, and wait and see if an opportunity arises in the future, to possibly make in-roads with him.

But dont let this get under your skin, all it will do is give ya tummy ache, and a bitter taste in your mouth. Your bigger and better than that, your a Tele Player!

Oh, its only my 2 cents werth, and its been devalued to junk bond status :? !

[chickenpicker]

What might have happened if you hadn't started cheering ND?

Seems to me that you contributed to the situation.

[CancerLeoCam]

true, I guess it may not have happened. that's 20/20 hindsight I guess but still...it's just a game.

[John Harrison]

Well, it was quite a game, wasn't it?

That might be the beginning of a conversation that might lead to some better understanding between you. Break the ice and, if the opportunity presents itself, you might inquire if there's some "dead elephant in the living room" that you're (both) tip-toeing around.

If he's a jerk, you're not going to be able to change him. However, you might at least gain some insights into avoiding getting caught up in his issues.

Then again, you could be like many other Angelenos (and others) and just ignore your neighbors.

[gitarjoe]

I have the same problem. I have one nice neighbor on one side, and a complete ass on the other. This guy knocked on my door one day, and told me to move my car(which was in front of his house). He told me that it is where he parks his car, and it's his spot. He has a 2 car driveway and a garage. Some people need to get a life.

[StratDal]

He's an sc fan...what do you expect.

I've got a lot of band wagoners out where I live too. 5 years ago you'd see some sc gear here and there but now, it's all over town. They love to dish it out but can't take it. When they lose, they will fall hard and will cry for blood.

[eryque]

Seems that your actions just incited a predictable response from your neighbor. It also sounds like it's a game that you'll never win. If he's got a quick temper that he doesn't quite control (kind of what it sounds like to me), you're not going to win at his game. Better find some non-confrontational ways to fix the issue.

[stephent2]

You're right, it's time to move. Life's too short to endure idiots.

[CancerLeoCam]

...the wife and I talked and I felt like there's just no way I'm gonna move and upset her life for this bozo unless he's threatening us.... but if he's got a short fuse and wants to remain socially isolated from us then I'll grant him the wish.

I sincerely appreciate the comments and I think the best thing I could do is when I see him next is to just smile and wave like nothing ever happened. As the flip side of this could have occurred. Meaning he also was jabbing but not trying to be a jerk-just an SC fan shooting back. What-ev. I still think the guy is psycho.

I think there may be some resentment though as when we met I told him I worked in research. He quickly pointed back that he did too. I told him I build drugs to save people. He said he works testing foods for a well-known food supplier. Maybe it bothers him that I'm 20 years younger than he is and have the more traditional "research" title and it bugs him. Dunno. I never really brag about it as I am a researcher that isn't rich ----so nothing to brag about. I am proud of what I do but I certainly don't think my "you know what" doesn't stink. Come by after I've eaten a carnitas burrito and a healthy serving of beer and I will prove it.

[CancerLeoCam]

yes... more the reason I was hootin' and hollerin' was the bandwagonning around here has reached epic proportions over SC. It is really obnoxious and annoying. I was listening to the radio yesterday after the game and they mentioned why are people so quick to hate a multi-year winner. I think people can't stand Goliaths and the way their fans brag as if they were literally on the team itself. Too many people in SoCal stir the pot with that team but still......it's just a game.

[Darrell]

he acts that way, WITHOUT sports being involved.

Personally, I think he is that way to prove something to his wife, not necessarily to prove anything to me.

I found out later, that when he is around me, he is great...as soon as his wife walks in, the treats me like crap. So I came to the conclussion that he is always trying to impress his wife, by treat others, OTHER THAN HER like crap.

IE...don't be sure that this is about you. It could be about him trying to prove hisself, around her.

[CancerLeoCam]

...that's an interesting take Darrell. Never thought of that one. I guess he's just short of beating his chest and bellowing. :)

....anyway. One thing that occurred to me, he might have been takin' a nap when this happened. Though I don't quite get it. I have walked by his place in the afternoon sometimes and saw him napping on his couch-not all the time but sometimes.

I think my excitement woke him up but how would he know what I was hootin' and hollerin' about to punch back? Maybe he quicklly turned on the tube and saw the drama unfolding in South Bend then unleashed his anger. ??? Anyway, I can't live my life around my neighbor who decides to sleep in the middle of a weekend day and expets everyone to kiss his a$$ by keeping low so he can nap in peace. If that's the case I got a suggestion for his dog that barks @6:30-7 in the morning on Sat. when they got out for the morning dump-a muzzle. Forget sleeping in with that one.

If it's noisy he should close his sliding door for one and go into his bedroom if he wants it totally silent. All the windows in our association townhomes are double-paned and the walls are thick. If you're in the garage test-driving a new amp people will hear you but inside the house you're pretty well-insulated.

I've asked the neighbors (including them-his wife) if they can hear my guitar playing and they said barely. That's with a Champ on 3 with a signal boost going in.

The other thing I was gonna mention is sometimes he takes a few doobies inthe garage and tokes. I get the contact coming into ours when I have the garage door propped. I've got nothing against the stuff but it tells me he's trying to chill out from something. With all the banging it leads you to think.

[Arby]

Does his behavior worsen when it's a full moon?
I have known a few people who become dangerously unhinged during the full moon phase.

[CancerLeoCam]

I did think of that. Kinda bizarre. If so, I'll know when to keep the slidin' door shut.

[Nub]

I've been watching this thread since it started, and I just can't keep it in any more:

"Geez, what are you guys, still in Jr. High? It sounds like you both need to grow up a little! And your wives, too! Now get off my lawn!!!"

Ahhh, I feel better now. :)

[CancerLeoCam]

well, the wife and i saw him out yesterday after work washing his car and he seemed to be in a good mood. As I walked up (after I parked the truck) I said with a smile, "I still think USC sucks.." He smiled and said," Ahh, that was you. I was wondering who that was. I'm a UCLA fan really but that was exciting to watch."

We joked a bit and I just realize that I guess however bizarre he was not pissed. If you heard him yelling back it was really an angry growl rather than a yell you'd hear at the game (mine). What-ev. I still think he's different but then again maybe he thinks I should be committed. I still am stumped on the door slamming thing.

I'm pretty happy now to know that things are ok. I really get bummed out when I feel myself and someone else are not getting along-be it neighbor, family or work folk. Thanks to all for the insight.

[PraiseCaster]

Good for you! You took the high road, and you can rest your head on your pillow in peace when you go to bed (well, as long as you know who aint slammin doors!).