Divorce (son)

[EJG1]

So my son is getting a divorce. They have no kids and no property to speak of. We have been paying his legal bills and we just learned that his wife has dropped her lawyer and will represent herself at the pre-settlement conference next month.

I'm wondering if this is bad for my son; i.e., will the fact that she cannot afford a lawyer make her look more pitiful?

[Red Square]

No, the "pre settlement" conference is merely mediation. That is a good thing. Her not having a lawyer and your son having one is a very good thing.
With no kids involved it shouldn't be too harsh of a deal.

[Tim Armstrong]

Generally courts don't do any favors for folks who aren't represented by counsel.

[czook]

Sorry. I have two married sons. Can't imagine going thru that with them. Hope all works out amicably.

[EJG1]

Its all very sad. They were married for 10 years and accumulated nothing, but she was a part of the family.

Of course we're supporting our son, but its so sad to see his wife reduced to this. On the other hand, I feel she needs to buck up and get on with her life and figure out a way to support herself (she has the same degree from the same university that my son has).

[Scantron08]

Originally Posted by Tim Armstrong

Generally courts don't do any favors for folks who aren't represented by counsel.

Yep. In fact, the courts usually go out of their way to tell the unrepresented that they strongly encourage obtaining counsel, as they'll be held to the same standards and knowledge that their attorney would be.

Unless alimony is involved, this is the kind of matter the judge doesn't want to make any decisions on - the more your son and his wife can work on the front end (via a property settlement agreement), the better. The judge will prefer to get something he/she can simply rubber stamp.

[brookdalebill]

The "law" is a language that regular folks don't speak.
I have had a lot of experience with lawyers, more than I would have
ever dreamed.
I have represented myself, and hired lawyers.
That truism about the man who represents himself having a fool for a client
resonates.
She should hire a lawyer, if she expects to win.
Lucky for y'all if she doesn't.

[Toto'sDad]

According to Abraham Lincoln: He who represents himself has a fool for a client.

[jimd]

My brother in law didn't have a lawyer and got screwed beyond belief and still is. Lawyer up, better yet get two! Even if you just want a nice simple fair settlement, a lawyer is the best way to go.

[emu!]

I got to ask...if they didn't have any community assets (house, land, furniture, etc.), then why go to trail?

Is she trying to get MORE than half of the bank accounts or something?

[EJG1]

Originally Posted by emu!

I got to ask...if they didn't have any community assets (house, land, furniture, etc.), then why go to trail?

Is she trying to get MORE than half of the bank accounts or something?

She already took everything in their joint account. She wants him to support her (i.e., alimony) because she doesn't have a full-time job.

My son worked full-time throughout their marriage. But he's in journalism and for many years was so underpaid that she actually got more then him while she was on unemployment.

When her unemployment benefits ran out, she got a part-time job. Then, right before they split, my son caught a break and got a new job with a barely liveable wage, at least here in Central New Jersey.

[Red Square]

The alimony thing is not likely going to happen, especially without a lawyer....but if it does it will be minimal.

[vjf1968]

Originally Posted by EJG1

She already took everything in their joint account. She wants him to support her (i.e., alimony) because she doesn't have a full-time job.

My son worked full-time throughout their marriage. But he's in journalism and for many years was so underpaid that she actually got more then him while she was on unemployment.

When her unemployment benefits ran out, she got a part-time job. Then, right before they split, my son caught a break and got a new job with a barely liveable wage, at least here in Central New Jersey.

Did he let her have what was in the joint account? The law in PA is that all maritial property gets split 50/50 unless otherwise stated in a prenup. I can't say what the deal is in New Jersey. If she thinks she is getting alimony she is not playing with a full deck. I hope they don't have joint credit cards.

And that is all for my 2 cents. Your son has a lawyer and she doesn't. Let the lawyer handle it.

[SamClemons]

Best thing they can do is put their marriage back together.

[vjf1968]

Originally Posted by SamClemons

Best thing they can do is put their marriage back together.

Based on what?

[pondcaster]

Originally Posted by SamClemons

Best thing they can do is put their marriage back together.

Ahhhh,... some comic relief.

[Arbiter]

Originally Posted by EJG1

She already took everything in their joint account. She wants him to support her (i.e., alimony) because she doesn't have a full-time job.

Don't know what Jersey's like, but if it were here in California she'd get alimony. That's almost automatic if the alimony-seeking spouse has not been working (i.e. housewife).

Best of luck, be ready to help out your son if she gets alimony, I've seen plenty of guys freak out when it's awarded - as it's frequently half your income, which would put me into the "living in a cardboard box" tax bracket - and then they do something REALLY stupid, like not pay it.

[emu!]

There oughta be a law against marriage.

[walleyeman]

It adds up to more then this cowboy makes!



Marriage is a union of give and take ... he gives and she takes!
http://www.nomarriage.com/

[timgreene]

At least he wont have to worry about paying her attorney's fees.