At what point do you, become "you"?

[backporch guy]

Originally Posted by Brad Pittiful

im much more assertive and confident than i was in my 20s...i guess once youve put some miles on life you dont seem to care about the little bs things anymore

I agree. As I get older, and have experienced life, I find that I care less about " consensus". I do my own thinking, and resent so called self proiclaimed and self appointed "experts" trying to tell me what I should think. I would expound further, but I might get reprimanded for being "political".

[DonB52]

Big Bend said it correctly...you become you at conception. You will never be the same tomorrow as you are not the same as you were yesterday. We all change in many small ways over time, however, what made you unique never really changes from birth to death. We are what we were created to be, each different and special. Our attitudes to the rest of the world evolve, but our basic core remains.

[ce24]

I was so much older then I'm younger than that now. Picasso strove to draw like a 5 year old....become as little children......I want to view every morning as little affected by yesterday as possible. in other words "Be Here Now" live in the moment as much as possible.........this is my quest!

[Scantron08]

27

[KellyCaster71]

I am me. But thankfully I am constantly evolving. I truly came into my own when I stopped explaining who I was and was content on existing. Life is the journey not the destination, 'cause were all going to end up in the same place.

I have a song I'm working on that answers this. "I spent my whole life trying to branch out, now I'm trying to get back to my roots".

[slauson slim]

You become more You as you age...learrning, and changing and discerning.

[Alex W]

Originally Posted by hekawi

i really found out what i was made of when i became a parent.

+1

Parenthood changed my life. Accepting responsibility for my child naturally resulted in helping me mature and grow in numerous ways. Selfish needs, insecurities, need for approval or attention, and all sorts of immature things evaporated. Even boredom. Imagine how much of a teenager's point of view reflects boredom and in turn the seeking of excitement. Not a whole lot of time to be bored now that I'm a parent!

[telleutelleme]

For me it has been an evolution, sometimes revolution to reach this point.

If birth is your core, I don't remember it very well.
Childhood, lots of change, very little consistency, along for the ride, not too happy.
Early teens great time to play and enjoy things, all about me.
Late teens gained some hard knowledge about life and death.
20's to find my direction at great cost, still all about me, lots of failure.
30's to recover from failure, find a path and learn to share. Not so much about me.
40's to accept balance and learn to create things. Plays well with others.
50's to practice what I had learned up to that point and to share my knowledge.
60's I've reached sagehood and time to exit one path (hopefully) and to find a new more relaxed one. Starting to be more about me again but not in a bad way.

Based on the question, I would guess sometime in my 30's I became the me I prefer and like.

[stnmtthw]

Originally Posted by hekawi

i really found out what i was made of when i became a parent.

This is true, but its only part of the answer. You see who you are in the face of adversity. Every day as a father is a new challenge, but how do you respond when your mom gets sick? When your wife is breaking your balls after a 12 hour shift? When your neighbor needs help? When someone lets you down? And when this happens, and we screw up (cause we will), do we justify it or do we try to do better, and recognize that we need to do better? Those are all the things that come with growing up. I'm not the same person I was a year ago, or even a month ago, because who we are is constantly being changed by our experiences.
I love Mal Paso's threads.

[6942]

I feel most like 'me' when I'm around animals.
I've grown too old to tolerate the BS games that often accompany social interaction with other people?

Steve

[Tim Armstrong]

I've always been me, my essential personality is pretty much the same as it's been my whole life.

Having said that, my AWARENESS and self-knowledge has grown tremendously over the almost 53 years I've been alive! Like all of us, I sure wish I knew then what I know now!

Tim

[Big John Studd]

While I agree that becoming a parent is a "life changing" event, I don't know that I'd call it a "me changing" event. What I mean is, even though for the first part of my life they weren't even there, I feel like my kids have always been a part of me. I still feel like the same person...me. Does that make any sense?

[63dot]

I became me at 17, when I got my license. It was also when I think I was wanting to be an adult and vote and do other things but realized I was not an "adult" yet. I got a girlfriend and developed my ability to do more than just open chords on guitar. So much happened that year that shaped my life and it made 16 seem so uneventful and 18 like no big deal. After that, each year was less interesting. ;)

[Rolling Estonian]

Another thougt: How old were you when you couldn't look back 5 years and not do a face palm for how immature you were? I think I was about 35.......

M

[Jack S]

I think I was me as a child and lost it as I went through school. It then took me many years to get back to the person I really was as a child. That is, I formed strong ideas about life when I was pretty young, but got lost along the way and allowed myself to veer from the path. Once I got into my thirties I began to realize how much I veered and began to move back to being the person I thought I should be as a child. I may never reach the ideal, but I am closer to that person than I have been since grade school.

[cowboytwang]

5 years old.
That's when I knew, or at least remember knowing, what I wanted to do and be. All I wanted was to play music, wear cowboys cloths, have a horse, and travel. For the past 45 years that has been my life.
My grandmother, and dad, both used to say I was born old. I believe it and I think that's why I knew what I was going to be from day one.

[Justinvs]

You are who you are at this moment, at this time, this point in the wheel of stars. The past is who you were, the future never obtainable. Each step you take takes who you are with it, each breath the first and last breath of the moment passing.

God, I can be so full of crap when I want to be! <G>

[macdog]

I think it began when I started to break away from the toxicity imposed on me by my family. Getting married was the biggest help in this area. I also think that we are multiple people depending on the circumstances. I sometimes wonder how different I would have been growing up in a different family. We are all works in progress.

[Westerly Sunn]

In those little moments when I have forgotten about what I need, want or desire or what I fear, or worry about... or what I'd like to be or know or think about...

When I am suddenly overwhelmed with the beauty of something or someone else...

Then I am truly myself.

[Wattie]

I am the echos of my actions, the reflections of my deeds,
When people lose their memories, imagination fits their needs,
I am not who I think I am, nor am I what I think,
I'm imprinted on a notion, and live in but a blink.