Hiding purchases from the wife

[Dave Hopping]

John7- MUCH appreciation for the clarification! And congratulations too.
Aside to Pengipete-I think that rule has an amendment saying all members must also buy the new dad a pint.LOL

[ROADMAN]

here ya go mate congrats on the baby..and if you do deploy
BE CAREFUL and GOOD LUCK...

[johnny7]

This turned into quite the thread and a wonderful discussion. And thanks for all the wishes as I am a new Dad. The one thing I realized is that my beer consumption had diminished considerably with the new daughter around. Could be the sleep schedule I am on.

I will be posting pics of my herd in the next little while.

John

[Colt W. Knight]

I would take this one step further and just say don't lie.

[stevedenver]

congrats on the new arrival how very wonderful-a new chapter in your life-start saving toward college!!!-itll take you that long trust me............

and for those who rail re lies-well i think it was a great observatoin about 'innocent gear purchase', and putting things into perspective,

i agree

it is not like an affair, or gambling, or something that is having a huge impact, not pissing away the grocery money on the horses

you know, the issue is communication-and we have that, if im 53 going on 15 when it comes to my interests ....so what, if she likes fashion trends in certain things or it provides some interest and a 'project', so what

if she were to say, do you thin we need new place settings, dishes, the bedroom needs a do over -again- or what have you, unless something is wrong or in poor shape, id probably think "NO" -

i dont think like she does-she doesnt think like me

the issue for many is asking forgiveness rather than permission-we are not all on the same page at any given point in time-she wants x now, i think we should wait, i want x now, she thinks its stupid, we eventually coincide

and the issue can also be, we dont necessarily consult each other on every purchase-face it part of the fun or sickness is impulse, or rather more accurately independence- i rarely buy on impulse-continuing frenzy maybe .....this i can attest to

'hon i have a wild hair for a bf twin-whataya think-whats 'smatter with your marshall and the tweed? well, twins are different... yes this conversation is something i can imagine well............


i hope that i am not so out of touch not to know the difference between a lie of convenience, or more accurately, of timing, and one in which the entire marriage is dysfunctional

ethics are very important to me, but as i mature, i think, i have learned that how and when and what information is delivered is also extemely influencial-often the difference between success and failure-same info-how its said and when-

and the bottom line is, when the purchases have little influence elsewhere financially-the issue is often more about self indulgence than deprivation, or really, control

chose your battles, dont sweat the small stuff, provided of course it is small-i assure you that if it was between necessities and indulgence, or her comfort over mine-there is no contest, -

i have yet to be able to fly using my ears, thank you