Band mate wants to take over and change everything? What do I do?

I'm in a band, which has basically become a weekend warrior without practices due to things always coming up, and causing an error at the place where we are supposed to practice. He also happens to want to make us from a small alt band into a synth pop band, which the rest of us disagree with. This is probably a noob question, but what do I do? I've already tried stating that I was not going to flow with the idea, but he used the argument that "He owns the P.A. and thus makes the decisions". I feel slightly compelled, but as the owner of the bass amp and nearly 3/4 of the instruments, am I entitled to an opinion?

Band mate wants to take over and change everything? What do I do?

You should fire Big Bend from your band!

:mrgreen:

Kidding,

Kind of.

You should fire Big Bend from your band!

:mrgreen:

Kidding,

Kind of.

I agree. Talk to the other guys, and ditch him.


PA systems are for sale everywhere, he doesn't have the only one.

In any case, each band member should at least have his own mic(s), mic stand(s), and cables.

I agree. Talk to the other guys, and ditch him.


PA systems are for sale everywhere, he doesn't have the only one.

In any case, each band member should at least have his own mic(s), mic stand(s), and cables.

Gotta go as #3. PA equipment isn't that hard to come by, but
putting up with control freaks is hard.

To borrow an old catch phrase: Just say NO.

Tim

I've owned all the gear and the trailer to haul it in, and yes, it was my band. But you would never have known it, because without the other guys, it would just be me and a trailer full of gear!

Finding the right bunch of guys to make/play music with is harder now than ever before. Finding jerks & a$$holes is pretty easy tho! Buying used PA gear is easy to do, putting up with crap from a newbie band member, not so much. Get rid of him and get yourself some PA gear. Then look for another member who wants the same as the rest of you.

I agree with everyone else. Let the guy know that he, and his PA can take a walk if that's how he's going to be.

I have been playing 47 years now, and have seen too many people like this. :roll:

If the other guys are with you on this, I'd just tell him that his choice of music is not what you guys were founded on, and if he is adamant about it tell him to start his own band, simple.

CL is full of used PA gear (probably from people like him :lol:).

Let him move to a new sandbox and take his toys with him. A p.a. is easy and cheap to pickup on craigs list these days. Cheaper to get a p.a. then have a lousy band member.

How many people are in your band? It's good to appoint a leader, but only by mutual consent. Having the PA is a non-factor. Then you sit down like adults and have a reasonable conversation about what kind of places you want to play (if in fact you want to play out) and what kind of music you should play together. Emphasis on together.

The PA guy however deserves help. Don't leave him alone to load in and out and setup, it's not fair.

Sounds like you, and the other guys, all do not want to go in the "synth" direction...

I say let him know that he is welcome to start a "Synth Band", but the rest of you will not be involved. Let him go his way....no sense in trying to work on a new band that already is experiencing "musical differences". It's doomed, as it currently stands.

I have been playing 47 years now, and have seen too many people like this. :roll:

If the other guys are with you on this, I'd just tell him that his choice of music is not what you guys were founded on, and if he is adamant about it tell him to start his own band, simple.

CL is full of used PA gear (probably from people like him :lol:).

They've had synth pop for 47 years?

You, individually, need to express your opinion. It sounds like you would like Mr. P.A. to go away, and you should say that. You should force a vote of the band members.

However, if you go this route you must be able to walk away from the band if the other members don't actively come down on your side. Otherwise you're just making noise.

It seems to me there are three positions the other members could take:
- side with you, no SynthPop and expel Mr. P.A. Buy another P.A.
- side with Mr. P.A. You'd have to leave if the vote went this way. If you own most of the instruments, the band will be left without, but that would no longer be your problem.
- waffle ("gee, i don't know, maybe we can work this out ..."), which is a vote not to resolve the situation; in this case you would also have to leave since you appear to find Mr. P.A.'s position intolerable.

Expect friction and hostility.

ditch him. good luck getting gigs with a synth pop band.

You won't believe how many bands I've quit and how many musician's I've fired in my 40+ years of playing. I have had some very successful bands because somebody in band has to have the iron fist to control members. Not to be the dictator, but fire him or quit and start over. I have great members in my current band of 4 years. We get along great, no arguments, and everyone will play for anything. I fired two people to make this band work.

Daddy Hojo, too funny...no they haven't had synth pop...they've had rock though. :lol::wink:

It sounds like he doesn't want to be in your band anymore and wants to start a band of his own. I'd get together with the rest of the band and if it's alright with them, wish this guy luck in forming the band he really wants to play in. Then, either go out and find your own PA or get something cheap to practice with and rent one for gigs.

-DJ

I have adopted a new strategy when it comes to this kind of stuff.

Be the leader of the band (not in name, but in deed) and have a band meeting... hand out an agenda, let the meeting time be no more than 30 minutes.

In the agenda, note that TODD (aren't these guys all named Todd?) has a vision for the band that he wants to realize and that you want to support that. Ask Todd as part of the agenda to map out what the band should look and sound like and what the result will be in terms of gigs, popularity and a future and a timeline for those things to happen.

Listen and don't interrupt (try to coach the other guys to do the same)

When Todd is done, agree with him and define a timeline... set the timeline for 6 weeks... go be a synth band for 6 weeks and have fun with it. (I played in a punk band as a fill in for 4 months once and had a blast even though I had no interest at all in punk or ska or mod or any of that stuff... fun though, especially if you don't overthink it and have it be about your 'identity' or something.)

What may happen is that he may not be a bad guy... his whole 'vision' thing may be a desperate attempt to allay his own fears... sometimes those guys, once they feel heard, back off and become sheepish and ask what the rest of the guys think...

Firing people is easy, working with them is the greater challenge but with the greater reward... inhale, exhale and play some music, don't take it too seriously man.

I'm in a band, which has basically become a weekend warrior without practices due to things always coming up, and causing an error at the place where we are supposed to practice. He also happens to want to make us from a small alt band into a synth pop band, which the rest of us disagree with. This is probably a noob question, but what do I do? I've already tried stating that I was not going to flow with the idea, but he used the argument that "He owns the P.A. and thus makes the decisions". I feel slightly compelled, but as the owner of the bass amp and nearly 3/4 of the instruments, am I entitled to an opinion?


Sure you're entitled to an opinion. My opinion, would be to find another band. Or privately ask the others what they think and see if anyone else feels the way you do.

You'll always need someone with a PA, and you'll always be at their mercy.

Was fired from a band where I didn't own the PA-never let that happen again!!!

I'd say send Sam and his synth-pop packing, if it's not something you love, then you're gonna make yourself miserable, and playing something you don't want to play either is gonna make you quit anyways, or find out what it means to be a true professional...:mrgreen:

And just for grins, here's some classic synth-pop...
Uu6MDdxBork

Franc Robert

I have adopted a new strategy when it comes to this kind of stuff.

Be the leader of the band (not in name, but in deed) and have a band meeting... hand out an agenda, let the meeting time be no more than 30 minutes.

In the agenda, note that TODD (aren't these guys all named Todd?) has a vision for the band that he wants to realize and that you want to support that. Ask Todd as part of the agenda to map out what the band should look and sound like and what the result will be in terms of gigs, popularity and a future and a timeline for those things to happen.

Listen and don't interrupt (try to coach the other guys to do the same)

When Todd is done, agree with him and define a timeline... set the timeline for 6 weeks... go be a synth band for 6 weeks and have fun with it. (I played in a punk band as a fill in for 4 months once and had a blast even though I had no interest at all in punk or ska or mod or any of that stuff... fun though, especially if you don't overthink it and have it be about your 'identity' or something.)

What may happen is that he may not be a bad guy... his whole 'vision' thing may be a desperate attempt to allay his own fears... sometimes those guys, once they feel heard, back off and become sheepish and ask what the rest of the guys think...

Firing people is easy, working with them is the greater challenge but with the greater reward... inhale, exhale and play some music, don't take it too seriously man.

BURN THE WITCH!!!!!!

Tim

Tell him Quacktastic said "This ain't no flock of seagulls b.s. and that he's fired like Kurt Busch. See if you can borrow someone else's pa for a bit until you can get your own.

i love Synth Pop so I say roll with it.

The last Cat that did that to me was canned.

Woof!

Besides the PA, what else does he bring to the band? I'm guessing he's replaceable, so you should cut him loose to follow his dreams.

The one comment I would say is that the band needs to come to a decision as a band, and there should be no backroom talks about others. Sit down with all present and talk it through. If the band decides it does not want to follow that path then let him know. If you are not happy with the decision of the band as a whole then move on. The important thing is you all either play together or not at all. Different factions in a band are like a disease that will eat the band up from the inside out.

theres allways another pa...and another idiot

There has been a lot of good suggestions given to you here. All else aside how are you going to be able to put your heart into music you don't want to play. It is about the music after all isn't it?

Sounds like the "my way or the highway" scenario.

If you've tried saying "no" and he won't budge from his position take your gear and form or find another band. Like previously stated.. PA gear is everywhere and easy to come by. A band works best as a team. When one person tries to fulfill his own agenda it doesn't work...unless the rest of you are willing to be a backup band for that person.

So have a sit down and work it out while being prepared to move on.

Fire him.

In the agenda, note that TODD (aren't these guys all named Todd?)....

This is truth, my guy was also Todd :roll: He called the meeting, the next day he got the call.:lol:

kill him.

Maybe you're thinking of it all wrong... if you and your bandmates are REALLY his friends, don't hold him back. Why WOULDN'T you free him from his current band obligations so he can go on to realize his synth-pop dream? LOL

You should fire Big Bend from your band!

:mrgreen:

Kidding,

Kind of.




Excuse me... I fire people from bands. I do not get fired.


:lol:


Obviously the PA guy here needs to be fired here too.

Oh wait, don't fire him! Stick together forever. You must be a friend of this guy for life and make music together forever. Its bad when you fire someone so don't do it.


Now obviously thats a bunch of crap. A band can only be successful if everybody is on the same page and going in the same direction. If that is not the case, then changes have to be made.

Good luck!

Have you considered "quitting the band"
and then (this works best if it's organized) each of your other members
also "quitting the band"
leaving PA holder holding a 'no members' band and a PA?

This strategy was shared w/ me by a more experienced musician who has seen all varieties of band drama.
I regret that I have lost his name in a moment of senior-itis (I'm only 54!) but it will probably come back as soon as I hit 'send'.

Peace - Deeve

I have adopted a new strategy when it comes to this kind of stuff.

Be the leader of the band (not in name, but in deed) and have a band meeting... hand out an agenda, let the meeting time be no more than 30 minutes.

In the agenda, note that TODD (aren't these guys all named Todd?) has a vision for the band that he wants to realize and that you want to support that. Ask Todd as part of the agenda to map out what the band should look and sound like and what the result will be in terms of gigs, popularity and a future and a timeline for those things to happen.

Listen and don't interrupt (try to coach the other guys to do the same)

When Todd is done, agree with him and define a timeline... set the timeline for 6 weeks... go be a synth band for 6 weeks and have fun with it. (I played in a punk band as a fill in for 4 months once and had a blast even though I had no interest at all in punk or ska or mod or any of that stuff... fun though, especially if you don't overthink it and have it be about your 'identity' or something.)

What may happen is that he may not be a bad guy... his whole 'vision' thing may be a desperate attempt to allay his own fears... sometimes those guys, once they feel heard, back off and become sheepish and ask what the rest of the guys think...

Firing people is easy, working with them is the greater challenge but with the greater reward... inhale, exhale and play some music, don't take it too seriously man.
For once, I agree with you.

Synth pop is not an entirely bad genre, and I've heard great stuff from synth players of the 80's era. Make a compromise, and ask him to pick songs from that era, you pick songs from that era you like, and then contrast. But, you should also keep playing your normal material alongside the new synch-dedicated material. See what fans enjoy more, or what draws in a crowd.

However, if it were me, I would probably leave the band and record my own material, or find another band. I wouldn't leave on bad terms, though.

Who books the gigs?
Has he got gigs playin' synth pop?

Why can't you do both?
Alt band under the original name and synth pop under another namd... twice as many gigs... right?

Me... I'd prolly quit... but then I have a PA

Sorry to hear of your distress.

Move on.
Life is short.
Don't waste your time trying to fix other people.
Working with them might well be the greater challenge, but who has the time to burn?
(An appeasement strategy makes sense if you're a corporate employee, maybe)

Go where the action makes you happy!

I'm in a band, which has basically become a weekend warrior without practices due to things always coming up, and causing an error at the place where we are supposed to practice. He also happens to want to make us from a small alt band into a synth pop band, which the rest of us disagree with. This is probably a noob question, but what do I do? I've already tried stating that I was not going to flow with the idea, but he used the argument that "He owns the P.A. and thus makes the decisions". I feel slightly compelled, but as the owner of the bass amp and nearly 3/4 of the instruments, am I entitled to an opinion?

I don't know how old you are, but you are too old to waste your time chasing somebody else's dream.

I think he will become more and more confrontational as time goes by.

I think he has already made his decision as to how things will be. With you or, without you.

If he isn't willing to change his attitude, lose him.

If you have to ask if you are entitled to an opinion in YOUR OWN BAND, it is already over.

Time for you to take back the band, or hit the bricks and start something YOU want to do.

I have adopted a new strategy when it comes to this kind of stuff.

Be the leader of the band (not in name, but in deed) and have a band meeting... hand out an agenda, let the meeting time be no more than 30 minutes.

In the agenda, note that TODD (aren't these guys all named Todd?) has a vision for the band that he wants to realize and that you want to support that. Ask Todd as part of the agenda to map out what the band should look and sound like and what the result will be in terms of gigs, popularity and a future and a timeline for those things to happen.

Listen and don't interrupt (try to coach the other guys to do the same)

When Todd is done, agree with him and define a timeline... set the timeline for 6 weeks... go be a synth band for 6 weeks and have fun with it. (I played in a punk band as a fill in for 4 months once and had a blast even though I had no interest at all in punk or ska or mod or any of that stuff... fun though, especially if you don't overthink it and have it be about your 'identity' or something.)

What may happen is that he may not be a bad guy... his whole 'vision' thing may be a desperate attempt to allay his own fears... sometimes those guys, once they feel heard, back off and become sheepish and ask what the rest of the guys think...

Firing people is easy, working with them is the greater challenge but with the greater reward... inhale, exhale and play some music, don't take it too seriously man.

That's a good suggestion. Act like a responsible adult and that should encourage him to do the same. If he doesn't act like an adult, then calmly and respectfully say that this wasn't the type of music you signed up for. If playing synth-pop is a deal-breaker, then let him know. Hopefully your friends will join you but you never know. Either way, make your point but don't be petty about it.

One thing nobody is saying:

If the rest of the band feels the same way you do, I'm pretty sure he would have been put in his place by now. It sounds like most of the band (other than you) is cool with this guy stepping in and taking things over. Am I near the target on this guess?

I'm in a band, which has basically become a weekend warrior without practices due to things always coming up, and causing an error at the place where we are supposed to practice. He also happens to want to make us from a small alt band into a synth pop band, which the rest of us disagree with. This is probably a noob question, but what do I do? I've already tried stating that I was not going to flow with the idea, but he used the argument that "He owns the P.A. and thus makes the decisions". I feel slightly compelled, but as the owner of the bass amp and nearly 3/4 of the instruments, am I entitled to an opinion?

If you think he's a PITA now, just give in to him and you life will be pure hell. Extortion is not a productive basis for creativity, success, or happiness. Call his bluff and fire HIM.

"He owns the P.A. and thus makes the decisions".



I saw a picture of a cute blonde laughing and wearing a t-shirt that said almost the same thing, but the P.A. part was spelled differently...... :grin:


Tell him he's acting like a P.A. and join the group or hit the bricks.



.

I don't see the problem here. If the PA guy want to do synth-pop, fine. But this is an alt band. He can do both. I know guys that play different genres in different bands, some share part of their line-up ...

As it turns out I'm a big fan of Greenland humor and never even knew it.

But as for this thread, it ain't blues so I really don't care. What the hell is synth pop anyway and how do you play that on a telecaster? And no, I'm really not looking for an answer to that question.

Tell him Quacktastic said "This ain't no flock of seagulls b.s. and that he's fired like Kurt Busch. See if you can borrow someone else's pa for a bit until you can get your own.

THIS!

His share of the gig money will grease the skids to make this happen!

There are plenty of out of work musicians who will provide a PA for some cash and probably run sound as an added bonus!

This is truth, my guy was also Todd :roll: He called the meeting, the next day he got the call.:lol:

same guy, moves all over the country causing grief...

Sack the singer or go off and start your own band. Life's too short for all this petty "we need to change our sound" stuff.