Make up a lie about the poster above you!

Penny was the Dancing Queen, young and sweet, when she was only 17.

Esaaal can't believe that he just set himself up for a comment from me about him also being a dancing queen. Fortunately for E, I'm above that sort of thing.

TGFM is not The World's Most Interesting Man, but he does drink Mexican Beer which is interesting. Given enough beer he dances gender neutral.

TUTM will only call that yellow barley brew "cerveza". This makes him a hit at the Mexican restaurants, until he calls for some fermented cactus juice as "ta-kill-ya".

Penny will only go to Chi-Chi's on Eli Wallach look-a-like night.

Whenever Esaaal sings "South of the Border" he does it with such feeling and intensity that his wife thinks it must be autobiographical and she becomes quite jealous.

being Oz'y and Musician. Chez crosses borders with impunity,being of dual citizenship and all.

eyerish was on the movie Snatch. So was turkish.

Everyone who buys something from DOGMA Dunn gets a free dog (and done).

rsg bakes his lies in pies.

You can call Boblets "Susan" if it makes ya happy.

http://cdn.guyism.com/wp-content/uploads/bullet_tooth_tony.jpg

PS: Phantom page again???

of Penny Century it is said; "ya doesn't have to call her Johnson".

As a child, Esaaal was traumatized when presented with a hotdog on a square bun at a Howard Johnson's on the Pennsylvania turnpike. His father,a prominent Philadelphia attorney sued and H.J. agreed in future to trim the square edges from E's buns.

Esaaal wants to play accordion real bad

dohn plays accordian, real bad.



(LOL my spelling !)

Esaaal has a Honda driving friend he calls "Accord Ian".

RSG's Army Surplus Tapioca Factory shuts down on Flag Day for re-tooling and a top down scrub.

E repurposes Army Surplus Tapioca into something somewhat like Gorilla Snot. He calls it Cassava Crud.

TGFM enjoys his quarter-sawn swordfish with a white wine sauce and capers.

PC savors the flavor of old growth, line caught halibut, hand plucked Arborio rice pilaf, free range organic arugula and a diet Tab.

Esaaal's favourite dessert is fig rolls marinated in Amaretto, served in pecan custard with Madagascan vanilla pods, a sprinkle of ground cinnamon and topped with a generous dollop each of crunchy peanut butter and strawberry jam.

RSG won't sleep anywhere near a Madagascan vanilla pod.

Esaaal is studying Madagascan so he can expand his foreign film library to include the Director's cut of Madagascar Escape 2 Africa.

86605

Tell u tele me has human paraquat marking on his unmentionables.

DOGMA Dunn's unmentionables are simply unmentionalbe, at least according to his significant other.

The Tigerlilies are adding a fourth member on clarinet and it looks like jimpri is a shoe in for the job.

Because of his prehensile feet Jack has a devil of a job buying suitable shoes.

His greatest accolade ever delivered to a shoe salesman was " I'll take them. They fit me like a glove."

Chezdeluxe was an extra in the movie "Quigley Down Under". He's regularly invited to Tom Sellecks ranch to carry the bucket out for Tom to shoot at. Chez always shows up with dried wallaby meat, one of Toms favorites.

Spudcrafter brushes his teeth with anchovy paste.

http://media.onsugar.com/files/2010/07/29/5/192/1922195/7a7abdf72ed619bc_Anchovy_paste.preview.JPG

Penny had a hard days night.

She had been working like a dog.

Yes, a hard days night.

She should be sleeping like a log.

But,

When she gets home to you.

You know the things that you do.

It makes her feel all right.

Boblets subbed for Rikki Fataar in the 1980 Rutles tour of Australia.

qEEfJGp6VLw

< may not be a lie> Heavens above, my secret is out. Penny has tracked down the only remaining footage of me in my white skirt - I blame it on the lunar eclipse, of course!! <may not be a lie>

PennyCentury once stood in for Dingo Rutle when the world renown percussionist has a mild case of the pollywaffles.

Boblets' feet don't quite reach the ground.

Like Boblets W3stie is also a recidivist mollydooker.

The ministrations of three nuns were to no avail. Membership of the Otis Rush/Albert King appreciation club was easy. The Libba Cotten Association was much more stringent in it's membership examination and both boys failed the entrance test.

"Shoot" said W3stie "I can whistle Freight Train with a mouthfull of Chiko Roll. I blame it all on you Boblets". Thus began the great Brisbane and environs Tele lovers standoff.

chez, w3 and bobl coordinated the above 3 posts via a conference call during their tea breaks.

As he's often pushed for time, Dr M usually makes do with an ell break.

The last time RSG was pushed for time, he punched the drummer.

TUTM has been known to use Sockratic questioning to solve issues of poor hygiene among some of his employees.

I have a redstring guitar, a whitestring guitar and a bluestring guitar. They all hide be hind a flag when it's convenient, and wear flag pins on their trucker hats.

DD tells lies by osmosis. Eventually one will get to RSG.

TUTM learns music by osmosis. His favorite musicians are still uncomfortable with his constant seductive and somewhat sexual rubbing of his body on them. They are suspicious of his reasons,when he says,"Its OK,this is for educational purposes".

Eyerish and his family still celebrate the anniversary of his Great-Grandfather coming to America because of the Irish Potato Famine with a 21 potato gun salute.

The potatos I use as weels under my amp are called spudcasters.

Dogma looks under tele pickguards with a hand mirror , then has a moment alone...

Displaying a serious habit of misplacing things, he is now on Telecaster803.

All of Spud's underwear is chartreuse.

All of TGFM's guitars have speed stripes.

Penny keeps a tethered goat called Ethyl in her back yard. No-one knows why.

w3stie feeds pigeons to the park

Donh keeps a detailed diary of every meal he eats...he has had the diary since the age of 12

When calling for advice on the latest technology, TeleManMeSelf uses a rotary phone.

E never calls for advice on the latest technology. His motto is - If I don't know about it, how important can it be?

TGFM is a hula hoop expert and was on the Ted Mack Amature Hour as a child. He still puts on clinics in Culver City.

Spud visits a clinic every 3rd Tuesday. But not in his own neighbourhood.

ChzDlx has a safe house in an unamed neighborhood. Using military training, old maps and a compass, he practices finding it from various parts of the city. He tries to do this without being noticed. So far he has been very successful.

TUTM keeps a jar on top of his toilet labeled "Butt Hole Hairs - Keepers".

Direwolf meets with TUTM's approval via his outstanding debut and consideration in adding his beard and moustache trimmings to said jar.

redstringuitar eats a flying vee every morning for breakfast

donh doesn't eat breakfast. He wears edible undies, and chews by wriggling his buttocks.

w3site is related to lucite, and both were banned from manufactures of toilets because of RoHS.

Duggie MacDunn is related to Mr. Mxyzptlk on his brother's mother's side thrice removed and then eventually replaced.

One of DD's proudest items is a GQ layout of his Man Cave's designs using Lucite, vinyl and Chrome. Sadly his gear has suffered because of the part losses.

tuti is known in pro bass circles as the fish whisperer.

JS is known in pro bass circles as Low-Down Jack, since he never plays above the fourth fret.

Mike is convinced tofu comes from a mysterious chicken-fish hybrid...and he eats it daily to try to possess it's powers

T..elf takes great pride in his ever increasing sprocket collection. He claims one can never have too much gear.

<no lie> Groan <no lie>

Chez intends to market a line of musical instruments,made from rusty car parts. His determination,"I will use no parts,newer then 1975,thus insuring their VINTAGE status". Its sure to be a hit with the "relic" crowd.

chez touched Dieter's monkey when told to do so.

JS finally deleted his original welcome post asking what the major and minor fish scales were.

telleutelleme built his own bat-signal spotlight

upside-down -- oops!

so he sent it to Australia

Donh is rewriting poetic history:

Listen my children and you shall hear
of the midnight antics of Bubbles DeVere...

(that's as much as he's written thus far)

Don on why he plays his Tele: "it needed frettin'"

The idea is to obtain a PennyCentury with two heads and no tails. Because if you flip that coin 100 times the possibility will be heads 100%.

DD has a dancing Elvis on his truck's dashboard. It's not artificial.

w3stie used to be 3astie before he moved.

Mike refuses to move.Even his house is called "Dunroamin"

Chezdeluxe is good one! I think that he is the best man in the world! :D

effacient is off his facient.

There is a tiny photo of chezdeluxe on the lower left corner of every single billboard all over the world.

People think w3stie has turned to drink since he invented the world's first spin-drying shower cubicle.

w3stie is a protocol droid who has partially mastered one language.

JackStraw is the same Jack from Jack and the beanstalk.

Do NOT accept beans from him.

Simonc always walks looking up in case the sky starts to fall. When asked if he is trippin, he always says yes.

TUTM has just spent Sunday putting new bumper stickers on his Silverado.

His favourite is "Women bus drivers demand longer routes"

chezdeluxe has training wheels on his tele

donh has a training BRA on his tele

Direwolf uses his Tele to paddle his pirogue on the bayou.

Spudcaster knows it's not the sky falling, it's the ground rising up!

PennyCentury has a tele-shaped bicycle

Don had bewitched his tele and rides it like a broom

eyerish is realy from the Pilippines and claims to be Spanish. Because he is ashamed of his parents.

Dog Ma has had three litters so far.

TGFM has a rare medical condition. If he hears the word spelt "gee ay arr ell eye see" he is compelled to put a paper bag over his head and sing "It's raining men."

dubyathreesty is often called Speedo but his real name is Mr. Earl.

JS doesn't know any Earls but he sure misses his copy of Duke of Earl.

TUTM has a couple of coon hounds named Duke and Earl. Earl has actually been trained to fetch TUTM beer out of the icebox.

Spudc has three miniature coon hounds that he named Dopey, Doc and Sneezy. They spend all their time looking for the other four dwarves.

tg recently received an award from the Sierra Club for letting his in ground pool revert to a oxygen generating algae filled pond replete with frogs and a pair of blue herons. Actually t just got tired of vacuuming the damn thing.

Jack writes bodice ripping novels for ladies using the nome-de-plume Jean Poole.

His most recent published work is "An Officer's Triumph and her Global Warming ".

Chez was the inspiration for using Fabio on romance book covers. at the first shoot,the photos later to be made in to paintings. Chez was heard to say many times over and over. "UMMM UMMM now thats a man"

He is now working on getting his teen romance books to feature Beiber covers. Chez having stated many times again. "That B,Umm Umm ,now theres a....a...ummm....aahhh...well there it is none the less"

Every time eyerish opens the fridge he can't help saying "I can't believe it's not Fabio", grabs a beer, looks at Fabio's picture on the door and walks off chuckling.

The poster above has a imitation crab meat gyro that smells like feet.

Doggoneit sent back an order of flounder stuffed with crabmeat complaining it smelled like hands.

Jackstraw has a dog with no nose. It smells badly.

w3, a cowboy and a rabbi walked into a bar. The bartender looked up and said, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

TGFM used to write jokes for Ron White. The feeble attempts like the previous joke got him fired. Now he sells T-shirts on the Amy Winehouse tour. Oh yeah, that tours cancelled, too bad, sorry about your luck.

The four potatos under spudcasters amp are realy potatos.

Dogman has a new cause to fight. He walks up and down outside the MGM Grand Hotel & Casino wearing a sandwich board which proclaims "Disarm All Crapshooters"

Chezdeluxe was a co-inventor of the Nads hair removal system. His body has been clean as a whistle and hairless for over 20 years.

Over the last 20 years, Spuds has perfected his whistling. He is about ready to upload his version of Stairway to Youtube.

telleutelleme covers his stairs with 1960s paisley shag

donh uses muffin tops as acoustic baffles in his home studio. Ants are an ongoing problem.

JS uses his aunts as acoustic baffles in his home studio. He feeds them muffin tops.

Last time TGFM fed them muffin tops he waited in vain for a heads up.

redstring heads up a sinister brotherhood of strat players. No strings attached.

W3stie's post above was a left-handed compliment.

What PC lacks in satire, she more than makes up for with her left jab.

And what TUTM lacks in savoir-faire he makes up for with his collection of truck hood ornaments.

What chez lacks in panache, he makes up in chutzpah.

tgfm was overheard at a cocktail party recently saying " Now you take gristle, even when gravy is applied it's still gristle. Marrow? Same thing. Mississippi Fred used a beef bone as a slide and wouldn't touch a chicken fried steak if the gristle wasn't trimmed off." His audience was spellbound.

JackStraw, likes a little mechanicaly seperated chicken beaks with Frog eyes in his soup.

DD is still trying to find out the difference between Frog Eyes and Doe eyes. He did figure out both freeze in headlights.

when asked if he wanted paper or plastic at the store Telleutelleme simply replied more cow bell garçon,the cashier being inspired by the Telleutelleme's desire for more cow bell travelled many miles during many moons searching for the unheard sound of more cow bell only to have come up short.......so he said screw it and wrote Don't Fear The Reaper!!!!!

ggg sells porcupine quills in bundles of three, because he can.

Boblets wishes he could roll sushi like an expert

When asked if 'everything is a tone control' meant that sushi was a tone control, donh replied, "Of course not. Sushi isn't everything."

TgfMike was heard saying that Fender guitars are a lot like sperm...........only one in a million work........Mikes funeral was beautiful though.......lol

tgfmike likes cycling. Currently he's on the "up" cycle.

w3stie and his new semi-retro fusion outfit can't decide whether to call themselves "Crash Test Dolls" or "Pussycat Dummies".

Definitely no "The" though, they ain't no fiddy percent Matt Johnson fans.

RSG was a towel boy for the "Pussycat Dolls".

No Pussycat Dolls for Spud, only genuine Marie Osmond ones.

Ever since the Kirn twins came to stay TUTM has decided he deserves a stage name.

The poll is now open:-

Bullmoose McVarmint
Dainty Manners
Con Sarnit.

Vote early and Vote often

Chez doesn't know the Kirn Twins, but he has secretly lusted after the Kim Sisters ever since that USO tour backing Bob Hope.

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3152/2820700481_c0b31a0a94_o.jpg

(they sang "spanks" for the memories)

I can't make up a lie about the above poster. I'm laughing too hard at that photo.

Dogman laughing.

FdghRwWfaOQ&NR=1

Chezdeluxe is the MP in the Kim Sisters pic. Penny C is the one on the left hanging on to the pole. Chez and PC have been dating ever since. Nice legs PC.

Spuds no matter how hard he tries cannot get "Brack is Brack" by the Kirn Sisters out of his mind. He now buys only Asian covers of his favorite songs.

W3stie is a bogan in any other state, except NSW, where he derived his tdpri username.

edit : whoops....where did I get westie from?

TUTM is Houstons one and only bona fide ridgey didge Bogan.

Simon loves the tunes on Japan-a-radio streaming internet station -- Pop music from Japan!

Seven legs on a squid is what is for dinner. PennyCentury invites sea urchins to dine with wasabi napkins.

DD was a postie in another life.

Bob lets anybody play his Tele and never gets mad about how you treat it. But, one of these days, he's gonna snap and I hope I'm not the poor bastard that's hanging on to it.

spudcaster has fashioned a new fangled telecaster out of a kumara.
Although he swears it has a sweeter tone, the potato caster purists are tsk tsk-isng about its lack of traditional tone-spud material, the ruby lou.

Spudcaster keeps a potato on a rope around his neck. He can be seen, when under pressure, to pull it out and mutter an ancient mantra succurro mihi oh valde solanum tuberosum

My Opeth poster has a picture of a Big Mac on the reverse side and was originally spawned in the oven of a retired watchmaker by a complete and utter nonsensical celestial error whilst she was trying to bake cereal.

patioplatemunchkin claims descent from Aaron Willard in his sales brochure but exhibits none of his supposed forbears delicacy or accuracy in the fine tuning of the internal mechanism.

JackStraw is slack-jawed at the jackdaw's intelligence and lack of fear. He sits on a perch made of birch and imitates their call in hope of attracting a suitable mate. So far he has been singularly unsuccessful.

Despite countless hours of practice over the years, W3's bird calls always end up sounding like sou_eeeeee pig pig. He has however, been asked to compete in Arkansas.

TUTM's bird calls always end up sounding like, "hey, don't I know you from somewhere?"

There isn't a girl in Wales that hasn't heard RSG's lame opening line "Hey, don't I know you from somewhere?". I mean, how big of country is it?

SPUDCASTER'S most successful opening line is " I seem to have just lost my nerve, would you mind if we just stood here for a few minutes until I regain my composure?"

JS doesn't need an opening line, he just relies on his devilish grin.

Mike's closing remarks are always the same.

"Yeah. Well it seemed longer than a minute and a half to me".

chez's opening line is usually, "Please. It will only take a minute and a half."

Everyone give TGFM a big hand as he heads to New Zealand to pick up the little lost penguin that he's adopted. He'll be bringing it home to Culver City in about two weeks. He promises to keep his backyard pool at 40 degrees and wear his tuxedo everyday to make the little guy feel at home.

We all should send Mike a fish to help offset the expenses he will be facing. Try to overnight those if at all possible so he can get those right in the freezer. Your quite a guy, we're all proud of you. Hurry Mike, they say he's not doing so well, he needs you!

If the rest of us send fish to Mike,Spud will provide the chips.

ChezD is well known to the authorities for his illicit fish-smuggling activities. It has taken over his life to the point where he has lost his Sole.

w3site has religious preoccupations and flighty ideas. Along with monemts of uphoria and depression.

Dogman has the lowdown on gettin' high.

http://www.orangepeel-sm.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/internet_high_five.jpg

chezdeluxe has that pic on his wall so he can back up to it and congratulate himself with a pat on the back for posting it

Ever since DH saw a silhouette of the Mime hugging himself, he knew he had a mobile self-esteem builder he could teach and market.

TUTM wrote The Idiot's Guide to Self Esteem. He also wrote Get Confident, Stupid! and another self-help book in the works called Give Up Now and Cut Your Losses! His dad was quoted as saying "He's a schmuck. I told you he'd never amount to anything."

3 hump camels have a w3site on their tails. They often shake them off in the Afgan oasis of Turdastan.

DD is careless about clearing refuse out of the atlas.

While Atlas may shrug, RSG slumps when encountering poor posting.

TUTM believes women find him attractive because of his good posture. He gives all the credit to his old drill sergeant.

chez believes his success with women is due to his skill playing plaintive courting melodies on the ocarina.

Jackstraw still plays the pan flute in a Zamfir tribute band. The drummer is his old drill sergeant.

SPUDCASTER hates potatoes.

hz longs to be inflated with 906 cubic feet of hydrogen.

I heard the shreiks emanate from Burlington -- TMike has asked Creston Lea to build him a doubleneck!

Camels with four toes and Afgan Poop Farmers enjoy having dinner with Penny Century.

DD is a delight to all.

Tmike is replacing the wainscoting in his dining room with figured pecan, and the ceiling with Telecaster-embossed tin plate.

PennyCentury is having her sidewalk made up with telecaster-neck-pickup pavers

Donh wishes he was hdon.

The always generous Donelson sent 147 plastic buckets to Greece to help with the bail out.

Esaaal was reported to the anti-discrimination office for calling Donelson a grease-ball. He denied it saying I've had about 147 drinsks Occifer.

Bruce Botchy would kill to give the starting spot in the All Star Game to Timmy Lincecum, but tradition dictates that W3esti should take the laurels.

Scott B is a slave to tradition and to fashion. That is why he wears pink satin French pantaloons from the 1800's.

To help out with the Greek situation, Esaaal sent this link (http://download.cnet.com/ZoneAlarm-Free-Firewall/3000-10435_4-10039884.html) to George Papandreou.

RSG is thinking of selling his Franklin Mint collection of Elgin Marbles miniatures and spending the money on one really good piece of art.

He can't make up his mind however between the Dogs playing Poker or the Dogs Playing Pool.

RSG is thinking of selling his Franklin Mint collection of Elgin Marbles miniatures and spending the money on one really good piece of art.

He can't make up his mind however between the Dogs playing Poker or the Dogs Playing Pool.

<no lie>:lol::lol::lol: cheeky....</no lie>

Chez got around through poaching once.

Afgan four hump camels like redstringuitar's sitar lead on the song Green River.

DD is actually me, re-registered with a new name in an attempt to outdo my 2010 posting pace.

When folks tell him the story of the Hare and the Tortoise, Mike always,always,always puts his money on the Hare.

Chez sells pencils as a Harekrishna at the airport but drinks the profits.

Git makes a strong tea from #2 pencil stubs that really hits the spot.

Jackstraw holds the patent for glow in the dark horseshoes and has tournaments nightly in his backyard.

Mixing it up at the croquet tournaments isn't doing spudcaster's circulation any good at all.

RSG never misses an opportunity to hits somebody elses croque balls with a mallet.

redstring has a collection of super-intelligent potatoes he calls his little project. He's trying to teach them Stairway to Heaven at the moment, but they prefer train spotting.

RSg really goes for Croquet, but hates to skin and clean them.

Esaaal,w3 and PC have formed a three liar tag team to take on RSG. Red has asked me to check the rules but it all seems perfectly legal.

<no lie> Hey I just hit 3000 :shock: Do I get a balloon or something :?:<no lie>

<no lie>Congrats on 3000 posts, Chez and http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_4kkT22kuvoA/S_aQ848r1mI/AAAAAAAACdk/zR8kgcufVkw/s1600/red-balloon-laura-buxton.jpg</no lie>

Chez's love of balloons stems from his belief that they were designed to control inflation.

No kidding it is the real deal.

DOGMA Dunn wrote the original "man from pawtucket" poem...ironically enough, as a children's tale.

homer played the role of the policeman in the stage production of Spike Milligan's "Bad Jelly the Witch".

Boblets collects pictures of stage productions of Spike Milligan's "Bad Jelly the Witch".

Freethenoise was fed royal jelly as an infant. Naturally he developed into a queen.

W3stie uses Buckminsterfullereens to polish the crome on his geodesic vespa garage. The result is too small to notice.

Esaaal supplies the aforementioned 'fullereens.

Hoodie has more Rupert Grint autographs than anyone in Tamworth.

...and I only have the one.

Esaaal is a "Facebook Friend" of Rupert Grint. He was suggested to Rupert by mutual friend Joel Terry.

"...and I only have the one" is the conclusion of a long story that Hoodie tells towards the end of parties, involving a koala, a Martin D-28, two loaves of Sunblest Soft White Sandwich bread, a can of sardines and two members of the 2006 Tamworth Rugby Union Football Club.

Mike enjoys Culver Citys favorite past time.....aging.

3 githeads walk into a bar. One has a bass, one has a tele, and the other has a Les Paul. They all play ice pick in the ear music through 23 fx pedals.

The icepick thing doesn't bother DD. He's lost all his high end over 6K due to all the years of being Pete Townshends guitar tech.

Spud enjoys Whitebird Idahos favorite past time...falling off of bar stools.

GH thinks a big night out is a visit to South Ridgeville.



Mike enjoys Culver Citys favorite past time.....aging.
You must be right. I spend practically all my time doing it.

TGFM has always said if he only had a year to live he'd want to live in Culver City. Because it would seem like forever!

Back in Mordor, SC was a dentist but in Whitebird, he's only a dental assistant.

Esaaal still gets jobs as "the work-experience kid".

His current placement is at Tony's Parakeet and Lorikeet Grooming Parlour.

Whenever Chez sees a mouse he freaks out and starts swinging until Moe or Larry gives him some cheese.

Esaaal freaks out whenever he sees a tassel. Then Moe has to rip off the tassel and tickle his chin with it. I can't wait til Esaaal sees TMike's new Tele with its fancy tassel strap!

Penny retired her tassels. These days she's into bangles and bows.

Penny learned of Esaaals tassel fetish when she used to exotic dance. Remember the Kim Sisters picture. I still think you have nice legs PC.

Spudcaster is just a spudboy looking for a real tomato.

SimonC thinks he is SimonT and has bought an appropriate vehicle.

http://theautocloud.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/VolvoandtheSaint.jpg

Simon likes drarwings of PennyCentury.

DD joins Englishmen out in the noonday sun.

Only fools and horses work and RSG is no stallion.

<no lie> RSG I just love Del-boy. Trotters Independent Traders have a great corporate philosophy.<no lie>

Alone at night, in his Fortress of Solidtude, Chezdeluxe ruminates over the circle of fifths.

The last time Esaaal circled a fifth he woke up in county lockup.:shock:

SPUDCASTER took the "fifth" once; he ended up spending 90 days in jail and 1000 hours of community service work peeling potatoes.

Like his hero Keef, jp prefers quarts.

Only fools and horses work and RSG is no stallion.

<no lie> RSG I just love Del-boy. Trotters Independent Traders have a great corporate philosophy.<no lie>

<no lie>Cushty! http://www.motoringpicturelibrary.com/docs/pic1334c.jpg...says it all really, eh?</no lie>

Mike limits himself to a single, but starts with a fifth. He once got slapped for saying "pukka" to a girl.

The tables of time have redguitarslinger on a stone hinge and sundial.

Dogma uses Stonehenge to double check his Timex.

Esaaal has willed his childhood Timex to TDPRI. The Mickey Mouse watch however is to accompany him to the hereafter.

tutm locks his Masterlock with a .30-06 Winchester and opens it with a 36-inch Klein bolt cutter.

tgfm uses a Klein flathead screwdriver to start his '73 Plymouth Gold Duster.

Plymouth Rock was Jack's old highschool band name.

His latest outfit is called Pilgrim's Progressive.

chez has a dyslexic best friend who feeds geese to his water rats.

Not wanting to be outdone by the Watertown Rats, Boblets is starting a skateboard club in Brisbane intent on establishing a new senior's movement. This is not to be confused with his usual senior's movement.

Not to be outdone by Beethoven, TUTM now insists on two bowls of fibrous breakfast cereal daily.

RSG is taking evening classes in an attempt to tell wheat from chaff.

Next semester (if he passes) it's sheep and goats.

Chez is learning to distinguish Shinola from Kiwi.

PC prefers Wax to Nair, especially if it involves her nostalgia.

tutm prefers soup to nuts, especially when it involves his pygalgia.

Three Backier9s had compulsive saturations with 2 Frontier9s. The latter lost to insufficent funds and intellect.

Sometimes Frontier9's pygalgia just can't be arsed to get involved.

DD had compulsive nightly saturations until age 15.

Redstrings strings are actually standard nickel plated.

NHClassic 30's Classic 30 is really a Classic 29 and 5/8.

NHC30 was a little annoyed to find that NHC and NHC1 through NHC29 were already taken. He was quite pleased to get NHC30 just a few minutes before poor, unfortunate NHC31.

gtc has been waiting a week to post at just the right moment to mess up my NHC30 lie. <no lie>But it didn't work.</no lie>

Mike has restricted his posting to an illicit connection via the call box down on the corner.

Summer fashions parading on the street keep him very distracted however and his timing can sometimes be a little off.

Chez runs all his lies through a DS-1.

As Esaal runs his through a bad monkey...

Our new pal Bray had a bad monkey named "Mrs. Tom Selleck" who picked a lock, escaped her cage and ran wild, down in Pine Bluff for 3 months. Bray got her back after leaving some Beluga Caviar, a little Brie and some Triskets on the back porch one night. Now, thier organ grinder act can continue.

Esaaal used to be a organ grinder monkey. It was a tough job to get but he was highly qualified.

Last weekend at the North Ridgeville Renaisance Faire and Tractor Pull, Githead defeated the evil King, slayed a fierce dragon and saved a fair maiden named Britney Anne Kowalski. The gratefull lass Britney, brought her hero a flagon of ale and "friended him" on Facebook.