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Okay, so it's not a Tele - but it is a watermelon (albeit scratched up and seven years old now) I made in the back shed. Anyhow, it got me thinking about your "clear finish needs to be sooo thick" problem. Have you thought about using resin? Either epoxy or polyester. It's cheap, and goes on with a brush. Is cured enough to sand in a couple of hours - and if you've seen a surfboard or two - finishes to a sweet gloss with a bit of elbow grease.
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Yeah, resin would definately cover it. You can lay that stuff on and it's crystal clear. When I was an art student some of the masters students used it alot. The only thing is, its very dangerous... sanding it presents huge and/or fatal problems and if you get the liquid in your eye it desolves your eye. Read the warning lables and take precautions!!!