just resonates of such a huge problem. See, I had similar issues with wife #1. She hated my music. I mean HATED it! She resented my daughter being interested in it and being able (at THREE YEARS OLD!!!) to pick up on harmony vocals in a song and sing with THAT part. The other interests I had, like training horses (this was how we met, for goodness sake) - she got to where she hated that. She hated me fishing (she grew up fishing with her dad and loved it, would never go with me). I went to the mall with her, took her to movies, always asked if she'd like to take little trips, go to a romantic dinner, etc. I finally figured out she just hated my a-- when I wanted counseling and recomended we get counseling and start making some needed changes. She said (more than once) "If you don't like things like they are, there's the door". I finally took the ol' hag up on that and when she said "You love that damn red Telecaster more than me", I said "That's exactly right".
Fast forward to the current, perfect and final Mrs. 'Spreacher. She loves a home filled with music. She recognizes that it brings me joy and that I want to share that joy with my family. She encourages all the kids to participate and learn. She sings and dances around the house while I play, with the kids, too. She loves my modding of guitars (as long as we can afford it) and really likes when I take Jacob out to the shop with me and let him help. (Hey! A 5 year old has such a nice touch when doing that light sanding). I also allow her her hobbies and make sure she knows that she is #1. Uh...it helps to find out her favorite songs and LEARN THEM! Also to write a song or two for her.
Musicians (or people with anything that they are passionate about) need to find someone who is secure and not a jealous type. Jealousy leads to one wanting to control the other and the only thing that happens then is people will resent or maybe even learn to hate each other. Jealousy leading to control issues - one of the uglier things that can happen in a relationship and can do irreversible damage. This is coming from someone who does not give up easily. For me to say "the damage is done and permanent" was a big deal for me. Not saying it's your case, but be aware it does happen and sometimes it is all one persons fault.