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You were fired, by a group that couldn't bring itself to be straightforward and plainspoken about it. That's never pleasant. Moreover, I'm guessing you won't get a straight answer about **why** you were fired, either, since the group seems to have a track record of prevarication. Maybe you transgressed in some way, or maybe they just don't want any new members - you'll probably never know.
You should feel unwanted, because you are, by that group. Based on what you say they are a core group, together many years, and they don't want to accomodate newcomers.
What the minister's wife had to say sounds like an attempt to salve your feelings with no actual content, but you can never tell. Wait and see what happens.
But I think you're going to have to make some choices. What's more important, your feelings that you and your wife are called to a P&W ministry with consequent frustration if you can't do that in your current congregation, or your children's love of the parish and their religious education? This is one of those situations where no available solution is optimal in all ways. I think you're going to have to face the possibility that if you remain in that church that you'll be locked out of the P&W group.
Sigh. Even people in religious communities who profess the love of God are, alas, people, with all their contrariness and selfishness and pig-headedness and misguidedness. Being "saved" (or whatever term you like) doesn't seem to innoculate people against normal human cussedness. Sometimes I think the world would be better off without us, though that would be personally inconvenient to billions. But that's just because I'm a crusty old fart.
Good luck, hope the situation works out as well as it can.
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