Quote:
Originally Posted by vjf1968
You handled it fine. However, I would be a little wary about someone stating that they want to be the BAND LEADER. Sounds a little egotistical. I was always under the assumption that the role of leader is something that you gradually fall into whether you like it or not.
|
First, you handled it great. I wouldn't have done it any differently, male or female.
Second, a player approaching the forming of a band from the standpoint of wanting to be "The Leader" is not necessarily egotistical. Sometimes the only way to be able to do just what you want, is to put yourself in charge, and form your own band, under your own rules. I finally did this, and don't regret it one bit. After sixteen years of playing in bands that never made me 100% happy (although some were great, and I have no regrets) I just decided that the only way I was ever going to be 100% happy was to do things my way, and find good players who were OK with that. You'd be surprised how many great players are more than OK with it. But it comes with a LOT of responsibility, and accountability. For one person to designate themselves "leader", form a band, and be successful, they have to realize, and be willing to accept that all of the responsibility for making things go right, and all of the accountability when things go wrong, falls squarely on their shoulders.
I'm not always great at handling everything I need to handle, but I work really hard at it, my guys see it, and they respect it. Because I treat them well, and keep them working, and respect their contributions (musically) in return, and give a fair listen when they have input about anything, musical or otherwise, the approach has worked great. For several years now it's been a win/win situation that gets better all the time.