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getbent · May 13th, 2008, 01:47 PM

I hate when friends come to gigs...even worse if it is family...

They will look at the music very differently from the regular patron and all that stuff is stuff I have to try to 'control' which I don't want to do. A couple of neighbors showed up sunday.... they love 70's classic rock (think bad company) nothing wrong with that, but when we are wearing cowboy outfits and playing 'blues plus booze means I lose' and twanging with fiddles, steel and teles... it is just painful for them. Their comment 'we loved it when you rocked out on hot rod lincoln'... just a drag to watch their faces waiting for a zep tune or something.

I don't much like going to friends gigs either: A) I don't want to sit in, I just want to listen B) I end up 'rooting for the band' instead of just enjoying it.

The exception is watching my nephew's band, but there the crowds are large and I can hang back and just enjoy watching him have fun...

I love the anonymity of playing in front of strangers or folks who just like to hear us play.... we had about 10 random folks who came up to the bandstand recently and said, "cool! I saw you guys awhile back, this will be fun!" We give out wooden nickels with our promo stuff on it and the people who dig the music will want to come.... for everyone else it has that 'recital' vibe which is not what I want at this stage....

my goal is to be like the band in the bar fight scene in Junior Bonner... cool, twangin' and anonymous.

So, I think it gets harder as we get older because all of our friends have to go to countless 'support' events for which they get nothing other than 'duty' points. Graduations, ball games, recitals, school plays, awards ceremonies etc... I'm always glad that I've gone, but I kinda dread going.... to that end, I think lots of folks in the 40-60 range are just worn out from doing duty.

I stopped going to see one of my favorite artists when I realized that he'd slipped and I was now just going to 'support him'... that sucks! A tribute,sure, a fundraiser in his honor, sure... but for everything to be vital and growing and improving... it has got to be music you want to hear by people you want to hear play....

There is a guy I know of who publically decries corporations and marketing and shilling and self promotion... and yet when I was on his myspace site the other day his marketing was the cheesiest! He's selling shirts, cups, the whole wad of CRAP and pushing his shows like a used car guy... Kind of 'everyone else sucks when they do it, except me'.... but he is very young and probably doesn't have the perspective (yet) to recognize the duplicity.

Last... I heard a woman on NPR yesterday talking about dances they used to have in Dublin when she was very young... she said the dances were essentially for the sole purpose of getting working class men and women together so that they could mate. When I was in my teens and 20's I went to clubs A) to mate B) because I loved music. I played in bands because A) I dug the music and wanted to make it for myself and B) it improved the odds of getting to mate.

If you are 50 and married.... it would have to be the music that would be the draw (I'd guess) and all the folks who are at the venue to mate get annoying really quick.

sorry for the long post...

pps. the best way to get folks to shows is to be good. have a good press kit, have a sound and play a lot. you'll build your following without having to create 'false' fans who are fans of you and not your music.

May 13th, 2008, 01:47 PM	#5 (permalink)
getbent Moderator Poster Extraordinaire Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: San Benito County, California Age: 48 Posts: 9,452 37 Photos	I hate when friends come to gigs...even worse if it is family... They will look at the music very differently from the regular patron and all that stuff is stuff I have to try to 'control' which I don't want to do. A couple of neighbors showed up sunday.... they love 70's classic rock (think bad company) nothing wrong with that, but when we are wearing cowboy outfits and playing 'blues plus booze means I lose' and twanging with fiddles, steel and teles... it is just painful for them. Their comment 'we loved it when you rocked out on hot rod lincoln'... just a drag to watch their faces waiting for a zep tune or something. I don't much like going to friends gigs either: A) I don't want to sit in, I just want to listen B) I end up 'rooting for the band' instead of just enjoying it. The exception is watching my nephew's band, but there the crowds are large and I can hang back and just enjoy watching him have fun... I love the anonymity of playing in front of strangers or folks who just like to hear us play.... we had about 10 random folks who came up to the bandstand recently and said, "cool! I saw you guys awhile back, this will be fun!" We give out wooden nickels with our promo stuff on it and the people who dig the music will want to come.... for everyone else it has that 'recital' vibe which is not what I want at this stage.... my goal is to be like the band in the bar fight scene in Junior Bonner... cool, twangin' and anonymous. So, I think it gets harder as we get older because all of our friends have to go to countless 'support' events for which they get nothing other than 'duty' points. Graduations, ball games, recitals, school plays, awards ceremonies etc... I'm always glad that I've gone, but I kinda dread going.... to that end, I think lots of folks in the 40-60 range are just worn out from doing duty. I stopped going to see one of my favorite artists when I realized that he'd slipped and I was now just going to 'support him'... that sucks! A tribute,sure, a fundraiser in his honor, sure... but for everything to be vital and growing and improving... it has got to be music you want to hear by people you want to hear play.... There is a guy I know of who publically decries corporations and marketing and shilling and self promotion... and yet when I was on his myspace site the other day his marketing was the cheesiest! He's selling shirts, cups, the whole wad of CRAP and pushing his shows like a used car guy... Kind of 'everyone else sucks when they do it, except me'.... but he is very young and probably doesn't have the perspective (yet) to recognize the duplicity. Last... I heard a woman on NPR yesterday talking about dances they used to have in Dublin when she was very young... she said the dances were essentially for the sole purpose of getting working class men and women together so that they could mate. When I was in my teens and 20's I went to clubs A) to mate B) because I loved music. I played in bands because A) I dug the music and wanted to make it for myself and B) it improved the odds of getting to mate. If you are 50 and married.... it would have to be the music that would be the draw (I'd guess) and all the folks who are at the venue to mate get annoying really quick. sorry for the long post... pps. the best way to get folks to shows is to be good. have a good press kit, have a sound and play a lot. you'll build your following without having to create 'false' fans who are fans of you and not your music. __________________